


What if Mickey Fuckin' Milkovich had a journal

by Raine_on_me



Category: Shameless - Fandom
Genre: Anal Sex, Flirting, Gay, M/M, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-01
Updated: 2017-12-05
Packaged: 2018-12-22 09:34:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 39
Words: 47,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11964651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raine_on_me/pseuds/Raine_on_me
Summary: What if instead of going to juve Mickey ended up having to do anger management and write about his Fuckin' feelings, feelings that make him aware of what he wants…who he wants





	1. Chapter 1

"Damn Fuckin' theripist thinks I need a god damn journal what am I a twelve year old girl?" He growled throwing the book agisnt his wall. "Well maybe don't get your ass in anger management" his sister smirked from his door way "isn't this better than juve again?" Mandy asked not that it was a real question. "Yeah" Mick grunted "I need a beer" he pushed past his sister going into the kitchen "what are you doing?" He asked not that he fully cared of the answer. "I have a friend coming over" she was too bubbly  "dear God tell me it's not a fuck buddy" rolling his eyes he took a swig of his beer going back to his room slamming the door. He sat in his bed picking up the black leather book

 _Entry 1._  
_Fuck writing, fuck this stupid book._

He threw the book back down. Feeling around for his smokes with no luck "shit" he muttered remembering he left them in his jacket. He sighed knowing it meant going out of his room probably running into mandy and whatever idiot she had out there.

Begrudgingly he opened his door storming past the living room to get his coat "hey Mickey" a voice he recognized called out "Gallagher?" Mick turned his head "what the fuck you doing here" he played with the lighter in his hand "well you haven't robbed the Kash-N-Grab in like a week so I stopped by to see ya" he and Mandy laughed, Mickey didn't see the humor. "Well I was just grabbing my smokes I'll let you two girls get back to your hair." He snarled walking back into his room. He could hear the two of them laughing, the noise seeming to bother him he placed the cigarette between his lips the lighter took three turns before finally lighting. He took a deep breathe in blowing the smoke out of his nose. Mickey picked the book up again

 _Entry 2_  
_What the fuck is with people. Coming into my house…and Red hair is that even a real fuckin hair colour just trying to get attention if ya ask me…fucking worked too can't take your eyes off it._

He took a long drag of his smoke leaning his head back on his bed. "Hey" Mickey jolted started by the voice in his door way coughing out a pillow of smoke "sorry didn't mean to scare you" the boy smiled; damn why did he have to smile. "Yeah well whayda want" Mickey asked straighting up on the bed, "was lookin' for a smoke" he admitted "just got the one" Mickey showed him "thanks" is grabbed the cigarette pressing it up against his lips. Mickey moaned instantly realizing the sound turned it into a groan "I wasn't offering it to you" he muttered. Ian was one of those people that made smoking look attractive, the way he held the cigarette, the was the smoke came out between the small gap in his lips.

"Sorry" he passed the cigarette back after taking another quick puff. Mickey looked at the cigarette that had just rested on the soft lips of the ginger. He licked his lips and placed the cigarette on his lips letting it rest there a moment before peircing his lips together inhaling. "Anything else?" He asked from the corner of his mouth. "No" he smirked "but ya know…" Ian locked eyes with mickey "it's kinda like we're kissing...can you taste my lips on your cig?"

"God don't be so fucking gay or I'll put this out on your face" Mickey barked. Ian laughed and walked back out to find mandy. Yet Mickey didn't take the cigarette out of his mouth. He laid on his bed eyes closed puffing away at the last of his smoke. He opened the little black book once more

 _Entr_ y 3.  
_This book is stupid I still wanna beat on people…I'm gonna go fuck Angie zago now_

Mickey threw down the book, standing up adjusting the semi he was sporting; he assumed threatening people was now turing him on. He gave a half hearted wave "later" and slammed the door

_****_

Mickey sat in a square box of a room with not much to look at. Finally after what felt like forever the theripist walked in "thank you for coming" the doctor smiled "yeah like there was a fuckin choice" he rolled his eyes "let's talk about the journal" the doctor sat in his chair "what about it I wrote in it like ya told me too" Mickey snapped "true, but you haven't dove into feelings like why you want to hurt people or why you feel the need to have intercourse with someone named Angie" the doctor pointed out "why? cause everyone fucks Angie" he informed her. She was a very attractive older woman probably only maybe coming into her forties but still having her looks that parolees and kids outta juve would do anything for her "so who's the red head?" She asked running her hair through her box coloured red. "what?" Slightly confused Mickey

"Is that Angie zago? The red head that caught your attention?" She pushed "listen doc you are reading too much into that, you told me to write in the book I did, my sister had a friend over it was annoying that's it" he stood up "we good?"

She nodded "you may leave, but next week try for more in this book" she tossed it to him. Mick fumbled to grab it "see ya doc" Mickey walked out. He shoved the book into his jacket pocket. Nearly home he remembered he was out of cigarettes rolling his head back he took the next left arriving at the Kash-n-Grab. Pushing the doors open he strolled to the counter

"Gallagher, throw me some smokes" he ordered  
"Miss me did ya Mick?" Ian smiled behind the counter "no you took my last cigarette so give me a new pack" he demanded "you mean give you one and you'll pay right?" Ian held the cigarettes taunting him "no I mean give them to me" he reached.  "Listen ya fucking ginger just give it to me" Mickey was getting annoyed at this little game "oh I'll give it to you Mickey if that's what you want" the comment caught Mickey off guard what was this kid saying "yeah right Gallagher" Mickey rolled his eyes yanking the cigarettes from Ian's hand storming out the door. He was barely two steps out before opening the pack and placing a cigarette between his lips. Storming home he was grateful he only lived another few blocks, also grateful when he got home no one was there.

It was usually only he and Mandy living in the house, so it wasn't surprising for it to be empty but he'd rather not talk to anyone. He flopped onto the sofa, feeling around his jacket to take out the journal and pen

 _Entry 4._  
_What the fuck was that._  
_What's "oh I'll give it to ya"_  
_Why was it intriguing ?_


	2. Chapter 2

Mandy was the first to wake up; not that was anything new. She sluggishly made her way to the kitchen to make the coffee. Her eyes barely open she waited watching the coffee slowly perculate "we really need to get a fucking Keurig" she muttered to herself. She paced through the kitchen and into the living room, about to turn around she noticed Mickey's black book. "Something to read with my coffee" she grinned taking the book back to the kitchen.

Now with the book in her hand there was no time to wait she removed the glass carafe and placed her oversized mug under till it filled. She placed the carafe back and sat in the chair bringing a knee up to her chest. It's as if his Spidey senses were tingling cause as Mandy finished the very short first entry his door flung open, he grunted what could have been a decant hello/good morning but seeing the book in her hands he lunged across the table "not yours" he grumbled taking the book tucking it under his arm and grabbing a mug for coffee. "So you actual wrote in it?" She sounded surprised "not enough according to the doc" he answered filling his cup of coffee.

"Then can I read it?" She asked too perky for Mickey just being up. "Not a chance" his low horse morning voice stated as he had the first sip of coffee his eyes closed swallowing the first gulp he exhaled. Mickey didn't believe in God but the first cup of coffee in the morning was the closest thing to a religious experience he was gonna get. "Why did you talk about me?" She asked "no, god not everything is about you" Mickey hissed sitting down across form her "so who is in it?" Her interests perked. Mickey shrugged he had to get his sister off his back "I mentioned going to fuck Angie zago"

"Everyone does that, that's not juicy" she sighed obviously hoping for more. "Well when it gets good I wanna know." She smiled before lowering her head to her coffee

"Oh good there's coffee" a voice came from behind Mickey "fuck--" he jolted his head  up in surprise. Ian casually walked into the kitchen filled up his cup and open the fridge sniffing the milk ensuring it was useable "morning to you too Mickey" closing the door he sat next to Mandy "why are you here?" He groaned "Mandy and I had a sleepover" Ian informed him "funny I didn't hear Mandy and her loud sex noises at all last night." The two laughed, laughed harder and longer than Mickey thought necessary he didn't think he said anything humorous. "What?" Their laughing annoyed him not that he really cared of their answer

"I don't want to have sex with Mandy!" Ian proclaimed "I mean Reds adorbs, but I'm not his type" Mandy added "yeah alright still don't know why that so so Fuckin' funny" he stood up annoyed with the pair of them "it's funny cause he's gay!" Mandy yelled louder than she meant to "you knew that tho" Ian added "you always  call me out for it…" Ian lingered his gaze on Mickey yeah he knew he must have… " fuck I call everyone gay don't think you're so special just cause you are" Mickey spat breaking the gaze with Ian that lasted longer than  it probably should  have. He grabbed his cup  of coffee and book walking away and slamming his bedroom door

 _Entry 5._  
_God damnit ginger._  
_How the fuck was I gonna know that._  
_Why the hell would I care._

_***_

Mickey wasn't sure how long he was in his room but the snickering seemed to have stopped so he felt it safe to leave his room again, his coffee needed refilling and he really needed to stop leaving his cigarettes in his jacket.

As he made it to the living room he could hear the old pipes creaking mandy must be in the shower. Mickey sat down, he reached behind him to get the jacket on the back of the chair, once in his hands he stretched out in the chair. It wasn't till he was lighting the cigarette that he noticed the ginger sleeping on the sofa in front of him.

Mickey paused unsure what to do next. The cigarette burned between his lips. He looked at Ian, he'd never really looked at him before, I mean a guy just can't look at another guy, people might talk. Mickey noticed Ian's long eyelashes, his pale porcelain skin, his thin lips… Mickey shook his head and dove into his book

 _Entry 6._  
_Why do I enjoying watching you sleep?_  
_Who the fuck are you, what is going on?_

Mickey was intrupted by groaning sounds on the couch. "Hey" Ian have a sleepy smile "must of dozed off" he admitted "yeah looks that way" Mickey gave a nonchalant shrug "you gotta phone?" Ian asked "yeah" Mickey digging the phone out of his jeans, tossed it to him without a second thought. "Thanks" Ian's thumbs quickly went across the numbers then threw the phone back "uh- ok" Mick looked at his phone to see Ian's name now had a slot in the contracts "what's this shit?" He asked. It was Ian's turn to shrug "in case you ever wanna hang out" Mickey grunted at the thought  "you're always here anyway, Don't think I'll need it but thanks" he shoved the phone back into his pocket "so what's the book?" Ian asked "probation…anger management shit. And if you fucking make fun of it I'll punch you out" Mickey threatened,  most people feared his threats not Ian; he chuckled. He was sure Mickey could kick his ass, but he also trained as an ROTC when he was a teen he could probably get a few good punches in. "I see it's going well"

Ian liked odd people, he grew up in an fucked up family, he didn't fit in he was drawn to those types of people people with a story, raw people and Mickey was definitely one of those people that "alright Gallagher" Mickey got up "I'm goin out, let yourself out…or not I don't really give a shit" before closing the door he looked back Red waved Mickey almost had what people might think is a smile on his face

Mickey had a bunch of pent up emotions happening and the only way he knew how to deal with it was to steal, and beat people. Mickey would have robbed his usual Kash-n-Grab but the woman was working and he had a rule about not beating woman, he wasn't Terry, he was better than his father. Every store he past seemed to have woman working "fuck" Mickey cursed sitting finding a near by bench to sit on

 _Entry 7._  
_I just want to fucking punch someone_  
_When did so many God damn woman start working , I dont wallop on 'em I ain't Terry._  
_Don't feel like fucking Angie zago either she's an ugly bitch._

Mickey put the book away and took out his phone. Staring at Ian's blank text page

 _Hey you still at my place?_ [Message sent 2:47]

           ...  
 _Yeah [_ message received 2:47]

Mickey swallowed hard, turning to head home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope ya'll weren't expecting gallavich. Nope I'm gonna make you wait... Ok jk it's probably about to happen 
> 
> Comment with thoughts and ideas!!


	3. Chapter 3

Mickey rushed into his house, still unsure why he was rushing "Mandy!" He yelled not even scanning the room. "She's gone to work" Ian responded calmly standing up from the chair "everything alright?" Concern in his voice.

Mickey looked around as if not believing they were alone. His hands were tense he kept clenching and releasing his fingers before he found them on Ian's face bringing their lips together. It was impulse he plowed into the slim ginger; their bodies colliding, kissing him a bit too roughly; not that Ian seemed to complain he even open his mouth to Mickey his tounge pushing to be let in to Mickey's mouth.

Mickey pushed off him wiping his mouth on his sleeve "get out" he ordered. "Mickey, wait can we talk about his" Ian tried to step closer "I said out" Mickey shrugged away from Ian's reaching hand. Ian sheepishly agreed it wasn't the time to fight Mickey on this.

 _Entry 8._  
_What the fuck did I just do, I can't hit people so I kiss the first person i see?_  
_Damn it was a great kiss…_  
_No_  
_Fuck this book_  
_Fuck feelings_  
_I'm gonna ignore it all cause this shit is fucked up._

_****_

Mickey was back in the same boring room with the doctors accomplishments on the wall "Mickey" she smiled entering the room "why don't you tell me about the last few days" she spoke in a soft typical theripist voice. "Why don't you just fucking read about it Liz" he huffed "oh I have" Elizabeth tapped the top of the book "I'd say you have something else on your mind besides the abuse of others" she looked impressed "don't run from your feelings Mr milkovich, if you like her you should try this, a healthy relationship might be what you need" the word _her_ sent a sharp pain through Mickey and an anger he wasn't expecting "fuck you doc" he stood up in a furry "Mr milkovich what just happened?" She asked unsurprisingly a little nervous of Mickey's demeanor "you and your fucking feelings, and you think you can figure out mine…no this is bullshit I'm done" he headed for the door "oh I hope that's not true" the doctor turned in her chair reaming calm "because If you don't show up, I have to report that, and then you'll be going to jail Mr milkovich" it was a hard truth but she needed to get through to him

Mickey lowered his head nodding, he removed his hand from the door. "Give me the stupid book then" he mumbled. Elizabeth outstretched her hand with the book keeping a tight grasp on her end "and mickey…i know you hate the book, you don't need to keep writing about how stupid it is" she arched an eyebrow "fine Liz" his huffed "and stop calling me Liz you know I hate it" she sighed releasing her grip "sure Lizzy" Mickey smirked leaving the office.

Back home no one was there and Mickey wasn't entirely sure that was a good thing.

 _Entry 9_  
_Ok stupid book…sorry I ain't going to stop thinking this is stupid._  
_Fuck_  
_It was a damn good kiss_  
_I want to fucking do it again_  
_I want to do more_  
_I shouldn't want to tho_  
_If Terry were here he'd kick my ass_  
_....Terry's not here though..._

Mickey dug out his home

    _Hey…sorry…_ [message sent 4:02]  
           ...  
   _Yeah what the fuck Mick_ [message received 4:03]  
          ...  
    _I dunno... I'm fucked up you knew that_ [message sent 4:03]

  _Want me to come over?_ [Message received 4:04]

Mickey's heart started to race of course he wanted to see the ginger again, looking over their shirts message made him smile something so small as seeing Ian type out Mick…only Mandy ever called him that, he was pretty sure everyone else was too scared to try out a nickname.

 _Yeah ok_ [message sent 4:06]

Mickey went to his fridge a beer was definitely something he required. He chugged at least half of it before taking a breath and lowering the bottle from his lips.

Either Ian was close by or he wasted no time in Getting to the house. He didn't bother knocking he  walked in. Instantly Mickey heard the door knob turn his senses hightened. He felt neevous, why the fuck was he nervous. He finished the beer meeting Ian in the living room "hey, Gallagher" hoping he sounded calmer than he felt. 

Mickey gazed into Ian's eyes. He never noticed how green they were. Mickey actually made it a point not to look at him, or any guy, or anyone at all really; looking at people would make them want to talk to you and Mickey didn't do chit chat.

Ian closed the gap between them, Mickey couldn't stand it anymore, he never realized another guy could smell so good, it was intoxicating. The next thing Mick realized his hands were caught up in the fabric of Ian's shirt pulling it off over his head. Ian had followed suit and was removing Mickey's clothes. "Oh fuck" Mickey panted opening his mouth allowing Ian's tounge to flick in. He cupped Ian's face pushing them closer. Ian's hand traveled down past Mick's hip. Mickey exhaled as he felt Ian's long fingertips wrap around his swelling cock. "Whatdya want Mickey?" Ian whispered in his ear taking the opportunity to nibble at the lobe, running his tounge along the side.

Mickey didn't know how to answer fuck, he didn't know what he was doing. "Fuck me" he instructed . Ian smirked he pushed Mickey against the wall, returning his hand around Mickey's throbbing cock. He kissed him biting Mick's lower lip. Mickey moaned he'd never felt so good, and definitely never let someone else be in charge.

"Come on" Ian instructed tugging at Mickey's dick. He pushed him face first to the sofa. Mickey was glad his face was being smothered by a pillow, it meant no one would be able to see the smile on him face. It turned out Ian came prepared, mickey missed the part where Ian brought lube and apparently had thrown it onto the sofa he was now occuping. The sound of the cap opening sent a shiver down his spine. Ian poured the lube into his fingers and brought them against Mickey's entrance, starting to open him up. One finger slid in. Ian slowly stocked his finger in and out before exiting completely. Mickey was muttering something into the pillow. All Ian knew is it wasn't stop so he continued

Added the lube to himself he let out a small moan. He pushed himself against Mickey, who took a deep breath in anticipation. Mick gave a small nodded letting Ian know he was ready and he wanted his

The first entry is always the hardest, it's hard to relax when you know what's coming, but you don't know how good it's going to be. Ian held onto Mickey's hip aligning himself, slowing pushing into him, and releasing back. Mickey was starting to think Ian was teasing him "come on" he grunted pushing his hips back into ian, causing him to slide in further. Mick clenched his teeth it was painful but also fucking amazing. Feeling his ass push into the gingers pelvis over and over made him throb, moan and a little sweaty "fuck me" he huffed "I am!" Ian informed him "prehaps what you want is for me to fuck you harder" turned out Mickey liked it a little rough. Ian slowed leaning himself into Mickey, going deeper he stopped there. Reached his hand around Mick's waist grabbing hold of Mickey who'd already started to ooze, he gave Mickey a few fast and powerful pumps before straightening his posture the pace quickened again

He was close

Oh God he'd never been the first. He grabbed his cock ready to spew he let out a string of curses as he felt Ian fill his whole. The ginger made some animal noises but overall was quiet in contrast to Mickey's vocals

Mick went limp his body trembling, the two stayed in their position for a moment before Ian slowly pulled out. "I'm gonna go clean up a bit" he ran his fingers through Mickey's dark hair giving it a slight tug "maybe you should too" he had a develish grin on his face as he walked away.

Mickey flipped over on the couch resting his head back "fuck" he muttered again. He felt he said that a lot, and that's saying something. He looked around he and the sofa definitely needed to be cleaned up before Mandy got home. He took a few more deep breathes

 _Entry 10_  
_Ok, fuck, did that do it? did I get it out of my system? all I needed was a damn good fuck? It was damn good too…_

Ian walked back out into the room "you coming?" He asked "yeah give me a min would ya" he huffed

 _Entry 10_  
_…Yeah I ain't fucking done with Red yet._

Mickey tossed the book to join Ian. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I had every intention of getting this to you last night. Damn real life getting in the way you were promised gallavich so here it is


	4. Chapter 4

_Entry 11_

_Fuck that was good_  
_What does that make me?_  
_No …it was just a warm mouth don't mean shit_

Mickey finished writing, closed the book lightly tossing it aside. "Hey" Ian smiled he had his jeans on but was still shirtless Mickey couldn't help but stare. He'd never encountered awkward situations; robbing people was always more awkward for the other person, he never felt awkward or guilty for beating someone who owed him money--or he just wanted their money. And fucking Angie Zago was only awkward in the sense he now realized the sex was shit.

But this, this was an awkward situation and Mickey didn't know what to do or what to say. Everything they did happened so fast, or at least for Mickey it was a blur clothes has flown off they did it right there in the living room, then again in the bathroom. But what had honestly just happened "hey" Mick finally focused on Ian's voice "what's going on?" He genuinely seemed concerned. "Trying to figure you out…all of this" Mick shrugged. God he hated small talk, talking about feelings so he damn well was going to hate small talk about feelings after sex. "Do you want me to go?" Ian sounded caring and supportive but his damn face looked like a wounded puppy, and Mickey made the mistake of making eye contact with him before answering. Rubbing the back of his neck he nodded slowly "yeah…"

Mickey could hear Ian exhale from across the room, the dissipointment caused Mickey to flinch "but maybe just to the store grab us some beers, smokes and a pizza if you're hungry." He added hoping it wasn't too late to save this. "I'm not an errand boy"

"You're right your not so just fucking go" Mickey spat "you're a decent fuck but I don't need any cuddling, or get to know you crap" the words were coming out before Mickey could even process he was too hot headed for his own good. "Don't be a a dick" Ian huffed throwing his shirt on "Mickey's always a dick" Mandy yelled from the front door. Sure she had no idea what they were talking about but she was ready to join in

"What are you doing here?" She asked throwing her arm around his shoulders "came to see you of course" wrapping his long arms around her he glanced at Mickey who was looking far too tense. "So are we just throwing insults or is there a reason Mick's a Dick" she giggled at her little rhyme  "you want just one reason?" The ginger arched his eyebrow "fuck off the both of you" Mickey got up storming past them "aw come back, I come bearing beer!"

Mickey wanted to run, which isn't as usual as one might think, sure he ran from cops, but he never ran from a fight or beer If he left his sister would know something was going on

The best friends were already into the beer. Ian outstretched his hand "one drink" Mick nodded grabbing the beer, their fingers overlapped, electricity fired through him.

***

One drink turned into two which turned into too many. Mickey wasn't a loud drunk like his two drinking companions, Mandy gets a high pitched laugh when she's drunk, Ian's laugh isn't nearly as annoying; Mickey liked the sound of that laugh.

"Wanna play a drinking game" Mandy pounced on Ian. Mickey groaned from behind them "god Mandy no one likes those" he rubbed his eyes. "Yeah I'll play!" Ian answered too chipper for Mick's liking; probably trying to get back at him 

"Twenty questions or never have I ever" she asked   
"Questions" Ian answered "when you know you were gay?" Mandy dove in "for sure probably 12" he answered quickly. He sat up ready for more questions "when did ya first have sex?"   
"13…no 14" he corrected "are you seeing anyone now?" Her questions got Mickey to start paying attention "not really no" Ian said honestly "what's that mean?" She pried "means I've fucked someone,  there could have been more but he didn't want more" Ian wasn't holding back. "Anyone I know?" Her curiosity peaked. Ian nodded. Mandy wasted eight more questions about the person looks or where she would have met them. And another five questions guessing names "last two" Ian informed her "no!" She whined "ok you gonna have sex with this guy again?" Mickey could feel the sweat on his face he was sure of it. Ian shrugged "dunno, maybe, I'd much rather be with someone who ain't afraid to kiss me ya know" Mandy was near in a fit of giggles "you like him!!" "That's not a question" he made sure not to make eye contact with Mick "but he doesn't like you" she harkened back to the first answer "doesn't seem like it"

Mickey took another swig. Grabbed his book

_Entry 12_

_I hate your laugh_  
_I hate that you Smells good_  
_I hate that your pale ass looks good_  
_I hate that this was the Best fuck I've ever had_  
_I hate that when I think of  all the noises you make gets me hard._  
_I hate you think I don't want you_  
_I hate that you're right there and I'm not saying this to you_  
_…I hate mysel_ f

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's late, its not even particularly long so sorry for that. But have you have a chapter that you know how to end it but need to get there... That was this one


	5. Chapter 5

The booze continued into the early hours of the night. Mandy hadn't made it…once she doomed herself into playing never had I ever and she had to take a shot for every question, she was past it curled in the big chair

Mickey wasn't sure when it happened but he and Mickey were sharing a seat, they weren't all lovey dovey intertwined. Ian was just perched on the arm of the chair. Mickey pushed his hand onto the arm of the chair rubbing into Ian's leg "I do like you" Mickey didn't make eye contact for a moment making any kind of declaration was hard for him and this seemed really awkward.

"What?" Ian shifted turning his gaze down to Mickey "when you and mandy we're talking you said I don't like you, that ain't true…" fuck he hated talking feelings it made him sound gay. "You don't act like you like me" Ian pointed out the truth "that's just my fucking charming personality" he tried to give a smile

"Then prove it, I'm right here" Ian dared. Mickey was not gracefully as he adjusted in the chair he pulled Ian's face closer to him, it was a rough first kiss their teeth banged together but Ian shifted down into the chair Mickey relaxed opening his mouth he licked Ian's tounge. He could taste the vodka he and Mandy had gotten into. He didn't care, it was hard to focus on anything except the sound of his heart pounding in his ears

He shifted in the chair, giving Ian more room, soon he was on top, his tounge slipping down the fingers throat. Dry humping him he could feel Ian getting hard. He pulled his mouth away "pants. Off." His grunts making him sound more cave man than ever. Ian wasted no time and followed the commands shimmying himself in the chair till his jeans fell past his ankles. His erection standing in front of Mickey's face. He nodded he was going to do this... He'd never done this before. He grabs hold of the cock in front of him stroking it. Mick flicks his tounge over the tip,round in circles.

Ian leans his head back closing his eyes a slight moan escapes his lips.

Mickey's fingers curled around Ian's hips. He licked his lips, opening his mouth, adjusting his angle, trying to relax, he pushed himself forward, until he can't go any further feeling suffocated by the large cock. Mickey kinda loved how it filled his mouth. He slowly began to bob his teeth gently grazing the sensitive skin.

To his surprise he felt fingers tangled into his hair, holding his head, followed by more groaning  "mick--" gasped Ian. "MmMm" hummed Mickey which sent a shiver through Ian "I--" Mickey didn't seem to care what the ginger was trying to say he pushed forward again, this time causing Ian to finish, spraying the warm liquid into his mouth.

Tracing his thumb over his lips Mickey sat back into the chair "fuck" he muttered grabbing a cigarette, the sound of the lighter seemed extra loud as the two of them leaned back in the chair, after taking a long drag he passed the smoke off to Ian who took it without hesitation. "Fuck" Ian turned his head looking at Mick "so you're turn?" He asked blowing the smoke out from the corner of his mouth "no" Mickey said simply "what the fuck Mickey--" he was cut off before he could finish bitching "it ain't that...we forgot about Mandy" he nodded towards the sofa "oh shit" Ian coughed out a puff of smoke "don't worry she sleeps like a log, but now that I know she's there this is all just too weird" Mickey explained. Ian nodded, not that he needed to his face was becoming flush with embarrassment. "Maybe I should head home then" Ian shifted uncomfortably now. "Or crash here, whatever" Mickey shrugged.

Entry _13_

 _I like him…_  
_But I ain't gay…_


	6. Chapter 6

"so Mr Milkovich, where shall we began" the doctor sat in her chair legs crossed the book resting on her lap. "I don't fucking care I just wanna get this over with" Mickey slouched in a chair his arms crossed he hated that someone else read his words. "It seems like you had a very interesting few days" she was saying words or questions that didn't actually require Mickey to answer and it pissed him off; to talk for the sake of talking "since I last saw you, you've written in the book five times" again they both knew this he didn't have to answer he nodded adding a grunt of agreeance to keep her from questioning if he was listening. "Tell me about the progression" if she worry glasses Mickey felt she's be adjusting them right now to look smarter "think it's pretty obvious progression:  
guy sees guy,  
guy weirdly thinks other guy is good looking,  
First guy doesn't know how to feel about, fucks the guy anyway.  
Admits he likes him  
The end"  
"Oh I think this is far from the end Mickey" she cleared her throat "tell me do you do a lot of things based on how your father would judge it?" She asked a very theripist-y question " I don't Fuckin' know I just know Terry would kill me, whoever I was doing and anyone who knew just so they wouldn't tell anyone else" the way he spoke actually made Elizabeth nervous "and why do you always refer to him as Terry and not dad?" She asked stepping away from the gay thing "if you'd ever met Terry you'd know he ain't a dad, nothing about it fits for him or how he raised us" Mickey squirmed in his seat he didn't like talking about Terry he was actually glad that Terry was in prison. "And how did he raise you?" She pried "he didn't I raised myself…and Mandy" Mick got defensive. The doctor arched back "aye, read the fuckin book doc I'm not gonna hurt you" he said almost upset with her posture "I get you get a lot of fucked up people through those door some of 'em I'd guess try to take a swing, that ain't me" he assured her "and that's because if Terry?" Asking questions she knew the answer to "who'd he hurt? Your mother?"

The word was barley out of her mouth before Mickey flew out of his seat turning his back to her pretending to look at the credentials on the wall, trying to calm down "don't" he huffed "ok we won't" she tried not to sound so worried "just come…sit back down" Liz coached him "Mickey!" She called a little louder "yeah" he sniffed before turning around taking his seat

Elizabeth flipped through the book "so this, this is why you were angry last week. I misspoke I referred to the red head as she" Mickey was actually glad to see the doctor step away and move to another topic, not that this one was any easier "seems so" he sighed "you know there's nothing wrong with that, I apologize for my assumption" she spoke softly "Do you believe in pursuing this? I think it may be good for you, having a meaningful relationship, something to focus your energy into." She smiled "thanks Lizzy but I don't need your premission to go fuck someone" he got up "good talk tho, see ya next time"

****

Somehow the whole day had past, Mickey was laying in bed not tired enough for sleep, but definitely not in the mood to go out.  
_Hey_ [message sent 12:13am]

It was late maybe red was already in bed, after starting at the screen with no sign of anyone responding sighing he tossed the phone on the best next to him. He picked up the stupid book

_Entry 14_

_I'm a Fuckin' girl. Sitting by the phone hoping to hear from him._

**BuzzBuzz**

The muffled sound of Mickey's phone buried in the blankets "fuck" he muttered searching for the phone

  
_Hey, everything alright?_ [message received 12:18am]  
_Uh, yeah..._ [Message sent 12:18am]

  
Mickey stared at the phone wondering why Ian wrote what he did

 _It's after midnight, people only text after midnight if something's wrong or....._ [message received 12:19am]

  
_Or..._ [message sent] Mickey was intrigued to see what the red head would say my

  
_Seriously... Or sex_ [message received]

  
Fuck. Mickey stared at the word longer than he probably needed to, his heart racing he swallowed

  
_Oh.._ [message sent]  
_Well that's disappointing_ [message received]  
_I thought I could finish what we started_ [message received]  
_And how are we going to do that_ [message sent]  
_Omg Mick…have you never  sexted before? [_ Message received]  
_Fuck no, and you laughing about means it ain't happening now_ [message sent]  
_Im not laughing_ [message received]  
_Just means you'll have to do as I say_ [message received]

Mickey smiled a bit curious of where this was going and what was about to happen, the idea alone was starting to get him hard

 _Whatever you say_ [message sent]  
_Put your hands in your pants_ [message received]  
_Wrap you hand around your dick_ [message received]  
_Are you listening_ [message received]  
_Oh God yes_ [message sent]  
_Good_ [message received]  
_Think about how good it feels, rubbing your hand slowly over your cock_ [message received]  
_Picture my mouth, my tounge on you_ [message received]

"Oh God" Mickey moaned. How the fuck did Ian expect him to text back and do this

 _You down on your knees? I can grab that fucking red hair, pull it.._ [message sent]

 _Oh yeah just like that milkovich_ [message received]  
_Im gonna take you so far into my mouth_ [message received]  
Are _you gonna cum in my mouth_ [message received]  
_Am I gonna kick you clean [_ message received]

Mickey had to put down the phone he was also going to need to change. After a minute of cleaning himself up and getting his composure back he grabbed his phone

 _Fuck Gallagher_ [message sent]  
_Night Mick_ [message received]  
_G'night_ [message sent]

 _Entry 15_  
_I'm fucking putty in his hand_  
_I  thought I'd hate it more but I don't hate that he took control._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little sexting to keep you going
> 
> What should happen next?!


	7. Chapter 7

Mickey woke from the best sleep he'd ever had. It was ruined by Mandy rushing into his room "why the fuck you still asleep" she asked bounced onto his bed "because you didn't come storming in here earlier?" He groaned shifting uncomfortably to make room for his sister "whaddya want?"  
"You wanna go on a double date?" She asked her voice too high pitched for early morning "no" he growled "come on! I got a date but he's like weirdly close with his sister and wants her to go on a date too, so I said I had a brother and there ya go" she smiled "no" Mickey repeated "why" she whined "because I don't like you" he grumbled "that's not true!" Mandy squeaked 'you're right it's not true, but ya know we are weirdly close too and you don't see me trying to get you laid" Mick now having to admit to himself he wasn't getting to go back to sleep sat up in bed rubbing his eyes

"I just proves I love you more" Mandy  scruffed up  Mick's already messy hair. "She's not my type" he informed her "you don't know anything about her, she could be!" "Doubt it" Mickey pushed her out of the way to get up "I'ma go for a shower" grabbing a towel he disappeared around the corner "ok we'll leave around 8?" She yelled but no answer from Mickey.

Mickey didn't take a long shower, if he had it wouldn't have ended up as a clean shower, his mind kept wandering back to his texts with Ian. The towel wrapped around his waist his hair still dripping he returned to his room, his sister was clanking around in the kitxhe; probably trying to find food, for a skinny girl she eats a lot. Mick booked up the book

_Entry 16_

_Mandy wants me to go on a double date, with a fuckin girl. Maybe I should just fucking tell her. Out of all the Milkovich's she'd understand the most…and im pretty sure she likes Red more than she likes me, so she'd be ok with it... Right?_

****

Mickey uncomfortably was at dinner with his sister, a very skeezy looking fellow and his sister who had an uncanny resemblance to his own sister. They both had dark hair, too much eye makeup, but Mandy  definitely had a better resting bitch face. Mickey knew they were introduced but can't for the life of him remember her name. She seemed to really want Mickey her arms all over him. He hated the feeling of her on him, but it wasn't till her hand made it up towards his inner thigh that he had enough

"So how fuckin messed up kinda kink are you?" Mickey asked "what the fuck Mick" Mandy hissed next to him "come on no one else sees it, he wants to fuck his sister so he's gonna fuck you since ya look alike ... Like really fuckin alike"

"I could say the same thing to you man" the date grumbled obviously not impressed by Mickey's accusations but not bold or strong enough to take on Mickey  "nah I was set up I didn't know what your sister looked like and I have no plans on fucking her, but you you knew what you were doing" Mickey stood up "I ain't doing this mands if you wanna have some kinda weird thing with him and the sister that's your choice I ain't going to be apart of it" Mickey stormed away not really wanting to leave his sister with such company but she made her own choice and sadly this wasn't the worst decision she'd ever made no matter how he feels about it

 _Sorry I left text if you need me_ [message sent 8:42]

Mick swiped over to Ian's name

 _You wanna come over for coffee_ [message sent 8:43]  
_Be there asap_ [message received 8:43]

Mickey wasted no time getting home. He got the coffee ready then sat down at the table.

_Entry 17_

_I fucking hated having someone else try and grope me,_  
_Fucking horny girl._

Hesring the door open he turned seeing Ian in a trench coat "it ain't raining that bad Gallagher what's with the jacket" Mick had a slight chuckle in his throat

"Don't ruin it Mick" Ian walked in kissing him. Mickey of course kissed him back "ruin what?" He huffed. Hesring the percolator of the coffee Ian turned his head looking embarrassed "you really meant coffee, just like you really meant to just text last night..."

"What are you on about? And take off the stupid jacket" Mickey reached for the belt undoing the tie in a swift motion only to reveal a very naked Ian "so all you think about is sex?" Mickey asked admiring the view "everyone Fuckin' knows coffee never means coffee!" Trying to wrap the coat back up "oy' don't go wasted a perfectly good hard on! You came here with a plan so tell me"

"It was a simple plan, do you!" Ian smiled sheepishly "well how?" Mickey leaned on the table arms crossed "I dunno Mick..." Ian started to feel akward, but still he was hot for Mickey "how about I just show you" his innocent smile changed

It didn't take him long to have Mickey's pants around his ankles, Mickey now face down on the table ass in the air. Slowly tracing his fingers along Mickey's ass cheeks "fuck come in already" Mickey growled Ian leaned into Mickey kissing his neck, trailing his lips down his back, the dip in the small of his back, his hands pushing the ass cheeks apart Ian's tounge flicks against the hole "what the fuck" Mickey yelped "did you just kick my fucking ass?" Shifting and turning to look at Ian "I did and I planned on doing more so turn back around" he sounded his finger around in a circle "you don't do that to people!" "You'll like it" being told you'll like something was very hot apparent so Mickey turned back around with a sigh

It took a moment to relax the muscles now that he knew something was coming. Mickey felt Ian's nose pressed up against him, his tounge starting to push inside. Mickey's breathing  became rapid before yelling "fuck!" This time not so much in anger but surprise pleasure. Mickey wasn't entirely sure what Ian was doing with his tounge but it damn well felt good his muscles started to contract again. Sensing he was close Ian removed his face from Mickey's ass aligned his throbbing cock and slowly insetered. Mickey hit the table "damn you feel good" "funny I was thinking the same thing" Ian smiled grabbing Mickey's hips and rocking back an forth Mickey grabbing his own cock the two finished.

"Fuck you horny bastard but that was...you were...." Mickey didn't even know what to say "I know" Ian grinned "should I get us that coffee now"

 _Entry_ _18_  
_Fuck_  
_The damn gays are good at sex... Or just he is_  
_Should I get to know him ...God THAT sounded gay_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another exciting gallavich for you! Maybe at some point I'll stop the sex and get some feelings and emotion but that time is not now!! 
> 
> Remember I love hearing from you and if you think there's a situation Mickey needs to write about in his diary let me know lol


	8. Chapter 8

They fucking fell asleep. Mickey woke up in a panic. Ian was nuzzled into Mickey shoulder, seeing him sleeping so peacefully caused Mickey to pause, smile and watch him sleep for a moment. He reached for his phone that was nearly out of reach, his stretching caused Red to shift, moaning. Mickey quickly got back to position and Ian drifted back off.

Mick looked at his phone thank God no messages from Mandy. He only slightly felt bad that he'd forgotten about her. He could hear her moving around in the living room, for such a tiny woman she had led feet. Slowly he freed his arm and slid out of bed, opening the door only enough to slink out and close it quickly behind him "when you get home?" He asked "I dunno before midnight I think" she'd just gotten herself a coffee and was curled up on one side of the sofa. Mickey nodded "and you good?" He gave her a once over she looked fine so he went for his own coffee while waiting for her answer "yeah I'm good, you were right…as usual" she hated telling him he was right "went back to their place and what looked like what was gonna be a threesome turned into them just goin at it, so instead of watching I left" she sighed sipping her coffee.

"Sorry mands" he took the other side of the sofa "whatever" she shrugged "so what did you get up to?" He became more nervous than he thought "before I tell ya..." He tossed the black book to her…which she missed nearly dropping her office trying to get "read this"

"All if it?" She asked shocked her brother would give up something so important like his inner more thoughts he shrugged "I gotta talk to you and it's just..." He was cut off by Mandy's annoying squeal "you like Ian?" She glanced up at him "you can't be more than two entries in how the fuck?" "It's not like this is in code" she smiled going back to the book "ok, no, you read what you needed to give it back" he leaned forward "hell no that means it's gonna get good!" She leaned away trying to read faster "oooo you kissed him" she giggled and with that Mickey ripped the book from her hands "that's enough"

"Wait…no, it's you!" She had a gleam in her eyes sitting stright up  "spit it out woman what are you on about" he spat  "nothing" smiling into her cup "just something Ian asked about once" Mickey now feeling hyper aware of the situation his sister had a gay bff what had they told each other "he asked how ya know someone likes you, cause he didn't think you did! But you do! What happened after the kiss?" She felt like she was vibrating in excitement 

"Morning" a groggy voice came from Mickey's doorway heading straight for the coffee "shut up!" Mandy's girly scream was followed by her hitting Mickey's arm "ow, fuck off" Mick pushed at her she bounced over to Ian "so my brother's gay for ya?!" Ian glanced over at Mick "oh more than once too"

"Fuck" Mickey moaned "don't go tellin' her everything" "what you mean how you like--" Ian laughed "you're not fucking funny Gallagher" he yelled. The two friends laughed and teased Mickey from the kitchen. But each jab Ian had a look that he'd give Mickey as if to make sure it was ok that it wasn't going too far, and Mick would nod and the two would continue with their stories or mockery of him.

_Entry 19_

_Damnit_  
_I like his laugh_  
_I like that he's good to Mandy_  
_I like that he's good in bed_  
_I like that this feels right_  
_I don't like how scared that makes me_

***

"So how many dates you been on?" Mandy asked them, as they sat around booze in hand. The boys had a look between them "define date" Ian finally said "ya know a date, nice clothes nice place…" she looked between them, Mickey trying real Fuckin' hard not to make eye contact with her "most of our dates don't have clothes" Ian blushed "she didn't Fuckin' need to know that" Mick sighed  "so no dates just fucking?" She clarified "yeah pretty much" Ian admitted "so do you even know each other?" Mandy wasn't holding back "what's there to know?" Mickey asked "I know I wanna have sex with him..." He paused it was the first time ever not just with Ian but ever he referred to it as sex and not fucking.  "Like right now? should I leave?" She joked only slightly concerned her brother might say yes.

"You know what would be sooooooo romantic" Mandy may have had too much to drink by now "you need to have the night" she told them "I think we've had 'the night'" Mickey informed her "no, no the night where you sit up all night and just talk and fall in love" she was gooey with the idea "stop making shit gay!" Mickey demanded "why? Ian made you gay I don't see you yelling at him!" Mandy squeaked. Ian couldn't help but burst into laughter "go to bed damnit" to Mickey's surprise his sister didn't put up a fight she kissed them both on the head  a stumbled off to bed

"Sorry bout her" Mickey scratched the back of his neck "don't" Ian said simply "I think you forget I like her too, she is my best friend ... Actually probably my only friend." He shrugged admitting "why you come kind of weirdo he can't make friends?" Oh wait no that was him it was Mickey who didn't make friends. "No" Ian chuckled "but with Frank as a father people are too scared to come over" "Frank's got nothin on Terry, Frank's a lazy drunk Terry is a violent one" Mick sighed he didn't wanna he didn't wanna be talking about their peice of shit dad's and who had it worse "so what there's like a dozen of you Gallagher's?" Mickey asked "more like half" Ian replied but Mick's puzzled face made him quickly add "six there's six of us" "and who's your favourite?" He was curious "probably Lip" Ian answered without much hesitation. "Mandy your favourite sibling I take it" he added "only one who's around long enough to like" Mickey said honestly. "So why...Lip? And What kind of Fuckin' name is that?" "Lip short for Phillip.. and I dunno he's my big brother, we've shared a room my whole life and he was the first one I told I was gay..." He smiled softly "so Frank didnt fuck up you Gallagher kids?"Mickey joked "oh no we're fucked and Lip's great and all but we can't actually have him meet like Mandy the two of them would be destructive" he assured Mickey "nah she's dated worse than him I'm sure" Mickey didn't seem to phased

They continued asking random question, some simple like favourite thing to do. Mickey was torn between answering punching people or fucking Ian. While Ian had normal answers like apparently being part of ROTC. which Mickey liked if this was gonna be something he needed him to be ok with guns. Other questions were deep and not at all romantic such as worse holiday experience. Mickey thought Christmas where Terry thought Mandy was their mom and assult her was bad but ultimately that would be worse for her. While Ian was Thanksgiving not too long ago where his mother slit her wrists with the turkey knife. Fucked up shit for both of them they agreed

They moved onto lighter topics: career options Ian wasn't sure but he was thinking something that helped people that was high energy. Mickey didn't know what to do he'd always been a thug he didn't have career ambitions.  What were three things they had in common Mickey only came up with they were both Southside, gay and good looking. Ian laughed but it a bit disappointed he decided to state they both put their siblings first, enjoyed quite nights in with only those closest to them and they had the same dirty sense of humor. Mickey liked Ian's answer better.

They must have talked all night before falling sleep snuggled on the couch. It was the first time they'd gotten together that didn't end in sex, and Mickey really liked the sex but he enjoyed waking up with Ian hugging his waist. Mickey was lost looking down at the sleeping beauty he couldn't believe this was happening

 _Entry 20_  
_I can't be, this was our first real fucking conversation_  
_Maybe it's just cause I'm still drunk_  
_I ain't gonna say..._  
_...at least out loud I won't say I'm...._  
_Nope.._

Mickey closed his eyes resting his chin on Ian's head drifting back to sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh we all know what Mickey wants to say... I'll probably be singing freaking Hercules won't say I'm in love all day now, totally worth it tho!! 
> 
> Leave comments, love, ideas or just talk, I love it all!!


	9. Chapter 9

Somehow Mickey had been convinced to go to a bar, and not the alibi apparently that wasn't fun enough, no Mandy and Ian wanted to drag him somewhere where the music sounded like a cat hacking up a fur ball and you'd assume the power bill hadn't been paid if it wasn't for the colourful strobe lights that happened intermittently.  
  
He was use to going to the bar with Mandy, she caught the eye of everyone and tonight was no exception, the black dress that barely covered her ass probably helped; Mickey tried not to notice. What Mickey wasn't suspecting but not at all surprised by was people noticed Ian. How could they not, flaming red hair, a very tight slightly see threw shirt and dance moves like a fucking stripper. He and Mandy were steaming up the dance floor with they're slutty dry humping moves they called dancing. No wonder people noticed

Mickey sat at the bar ordering another shot. Ian bounced over to him as the song seemed to come to an end; how any one knew baffled Mick they all sounded the same to him. "Come dance?" Ian asked grabbing his hand "I don't dance" he informed him. "Just one, with me" Ian pouted. Mickey didn't want to say no to is, but he also didn't want to look like an idiot he didn't know how to dance, not like this. But he also didn't want to ruin things with Red so he sighed "can it be the next song I just ordered" it seemed to please Ian enough who nodded before strutting back to the dance floor with Mandy. Mickey took the shot before the bartender could even get it set down.

Before Mickey could stand up someone else made their way to the middle of the dance floor, coming up behind Ian, placing their hands on his hips  pushing them self into him. Ian thrusting his ass into some random guy. Mickey could feel his temper flaring he wasn't sure who he was more mad at a guy trying to score or Ian allowing it to happen

He charged to the dance floor "oy" he bellowed over the loud music "hands off" he instructed forcefully placing on of his hands on the the guys shoulder and pulling back "Mick!" Ian yelled "what the fuck?" Ian was so taken by surprise "this fucker getting his hands all over you..." He growled "mickey, seriously look around, that's how everyone is dancing it doesn't mean anything" he glanced between everyone "well it didn't mean anything to me, I came out to dance that's all" he ran his fingers down Mickey's arm "I didn't realize you'd get so jealous"

Jealous, Mickey's never been jealous, then again he never cared for anyone before. He didn't own Ian, hell they've never even classified what they were, so technically Ian could do whatever and whoever the fuck he wanted. But that didn't sit well with Mick, he shifted his body coming between with "he's with me, fuck off" he barked the guy looked to Ian "ya deaf? get out, don't look at him look at me, you really think your twink ass can take me" Mickey took one step to lunged forward and the guy bolted

"That mean we can dance now?" Ian asked Mickey turned their bodies already so close, he grabbed hold of Ian's hips who let out a gasp of excitement, he draped his arms on Mickey's shoulder, their eyes locked Mickey could feel the energy between them, his nails dug in a little harder through the ass of the jeans, Ian nuzzled down, nipping at Mick's ear.

To Mickey's surprise they were grinding to the music, it was making him hard and based on how close they were he was sure Ian knew it too. Mick kissed Ian, pulling at his lower lip. God if he could just make him as his own he would. But did that sound crazy? Ian seemed to enjoy it though so Mickey continued biting any peice of skin that comes near him Ian's neck, shoulder, and of course lips.

Mickey shoved his hands down Ian's pants. His knuckles scraping the denim didn't seem to bother him. Why the fuck did he have to wear such tight pants, Mick can barely arrange his hand to have a good grasp. Finally he has a decent grip, Ian's cock pulsing in his hand, he tightened his hand pulling Ian closer; not that they could get any closer Mickey whispered in Ian's ear "i have you, this is mine you are mine" the growl in his voice was scary and sexy. He ran his thumb across the tip. Ian moaned the sound reminded Mickey of his own hard on as he twitched inside his jeans desperate to get out. His hand was cupping Ian's his thumb sliding across his cheek, he turned his head Mickey's thumb falling into his mouth, Ian licked it moving it with his tounge further into his mouth, he began sucking on it Mickey ached for more. Mickey moved his fingers wiggling them to Ian's balls.

"Mick--" Ian was breathy "don't.." Ian's body twitched if Mickey continued they have a bigger mess to clean up. Mickey's hand hesitated before strocking once more, he could feel pre cum starting to seep out. He wanted to finish Ian here and now, he wanted him to be his, he wanted to be in control. He couldn't do that to Ian, he wasn't an object to him he wanted this to be something and causing him to jizz his pants would probably ruin that.

His grip slowly released and removed from the gingers jeans. He gazed at Ian trying to judge the reaction "you're a fucking bastard" Mickey's heart jumped to his throat he'd gone to far.

Ian let a smile creep onto his face "let's get our of here, finish what you started" Mick exhaled his heart still racing, following him out of the club

 _Entry 21_  
_He's mine_  
_Fucks that's possessive_  
_But I don't share_  
_And I'll kill anyone who tries_  
_He's mine_  
_But I'm pretty sure I'm his..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I think you need a little more heat, that and based on lack of comments in the previous chapter that was all feelings let's get back to smut!
> 
> Comment away darlings  
> Tell me what you need


	10. Chapter 10

_Remember me, you're fucking sister, yeah you and your fuckin new boy toy left me at the club_ [message received 6:14am]  
_Hope the sex was worth it_ [message received 6:14am]  
_Ps on my way home, try to be decent_  
[message received 6:15am]

Mickey lay intertwinted with Ian, inhaling his sent, he'd never done that before; cared about what someone smells like, dripping in the smells of sex, sweat, booze and cigarettes was intoxicating to him he unexpectedly let out a moan. "Morning to you too" Ian smiled softly yet to open his eyes, his fingers trailed down to the inside of Mickey's thigh "god you're always horny" he moaned "I'm not the one with morning wood" Ian pointed out "get away" he pushed "Mandy's on her way home" he rolled away with every intention of getting up, except rolling meant exposing his ass to Ian who grabbed his hips pushing his throbbing cock into the cheeks.

Ian leaned in kissing the back of Mickey's shoulders, neck trailing down "I'll be fast" Ian said breathy reaching for the lube, soaking two of his fingers before entering Mickey's hole

Mickey has always been a lights off in the bedroom kinda guy, hell he barely makes eye contact during sex; which is more because it's hard to make eye contact when you're getting fucked in the ass, but Mickey didn't like the of looking at someone in the eye.  But it's early morning the sun is starting to light the room and as Mickey gazes up he can just see he and Ian in the dresser mirror. Ian's flaming red hair catches his attention first. His eyes travel down to his torsos, he's fit, but in not in an imposing way. Mick watches as Ian grabs hold of his hips and thrusts inside him. Mickey closes his eyes his head arching back "oh fuck" he realized he's curious to see what Ian looks like during sex.

His hair is a hot mess, his body glistening with the sunlight pouring in he's freaking Adonis chiseled body. Ian move his hips with ease as he rocks back and forth. Ian's gaze met Mickey's in the mirror "so you like to watch?" He arched an eyebrow. Mickey groaned. Ian always noticed Mickey's peircing blue eyes but catching them in the mirror looking at him made even harder, so he fucked harder.

Maybe it was the morning sex, or the fact the house was so quit you could hear their skin smacking together, or the reflection adding an extra kink but Mickey was already close. As he looked at Ian's reflection he realized he wasn't the only one about to come. He watched as Ian orgasmed, his hips thrusting forward filling Mick with his warm liquid. Ian leaned over Mickey collapsing himself on his huffing in his ear;it sends shivers through mickey, he's so close, and Ian must know that as he reached his hand around jerking him off "fuck" Mickey moaned as his body spasmed before collapsing onto the bed

"Really!" Mandy's high pitched voice came from the doorway "you two are both fuck bunnies" the boys looked up from the bed "sorry Mandy" they both said; Ian sounding a bit more honest Mickey mostly grumbled

"I gotta go" Mickey told them after getting out of the shower "off to see your shrink?" Mandy grinned knowing the answer "she ain't my shrink..." He looked between them, "ok yes she's a shrink... It's part of that anger management thing I told ya about" he shook the book "don't worry about" Ian smiled "we all got our own baggage"

Mickey hovered before deciding to  leave, he and Ian weren't at a kiss before I leave stage, a touch you on the dance floor stage he could do, domestic crap was hard and what did a fucking peak on the cheek mean anyway;boring. "So we gonna hang out today?" Mandy asked Ian as Mick was leaving "sure! you going to tell me where you ended up after the club" he questioned "are you going to tell me about yours?" She spared. And that was the last Mickey heard before closing the door.

What was his fucking baggage? Mickey wondered waiting for the bus. He wondered for about five minutes he already knew ian grew up poor on the south side  had a crazy mutt of a family and they already talked about Frank and Mickey would have no problem putting a bullet in him if Ian wanted it...ok yes now he was seeing why he needed anger management.

 _Entry 22_  
_I think I'd do anything for him..._

Mickey hated the waiting, knowing someone was reading his words, judging him, analyzing everything things   
"Mr Milkovich" Liz voice could really fill a room when she needed it to "not so fucking loud" Mickey winched "hungover are we?" She asked making her way to her usual seat "yeah, so? Let's just get this over with" he moaned "yes, I'm glad to hear you want to get started I'm very concerned about this" doctor Liz tapped the book "fuck what now?" Mick rolled his head back. "I'm worried about this relationship of yours" she wasn't fucking kidding Mickey thought he was gonna lose it "no, you fucking listen here doc you're the one that told me a relationship was a good idea 'somewhere to focus my energy' those are you're fucking words!" He growled, his head throbbing at the rise of his voice "yes, but after careful review of your own words mr. Milkovich this relationship is possessive. And possessive love is not healthy it can't last... To possess one totally is to destroy love" she sounded like a fucking text book or like a woman who's never had real love. Either way her words drove Mickey to want to hit her; but he refrained clenching his first and jaw.  "You don't know what you're talking about" he gritted his teeth

"I'm fucking happy do you know I've never been fucking happy"

"You ain't taking this away from me" he told her "all I'm required to do is write in the damn book it's not a free pass for you or anyone to tell me what to do" as he spoke his voice got louder "so either you let me walk outta this fucking room or I can shove this book up your ass and still leave"

 _"_ Your call doc" he could feel his chest beating out of his chest but he remained still as a statue "Mickey..." She only called him Mickey when she knew she didn't have the upper hand "my job is to look out for you..." She held out the book "you need to be careful you are a highly emotional person" she informed him "I ain't no pussy, im not emotional, you're way off on this one doc." grabbing the book he walked to the door "you seem emotional right now" she mumbled under her breath. Mickey slammed his hand on the door , made a few animal grunting noises before deciding to leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the chapter seems abrupt but it's been so long since I've given you a chapter it was due! 
> 
> More to come but feel free to tell me what you would want Mickey to go through


	11. Chapter 11

Mickey was fuming, he'd already put a beat down on a few wanna be thugs but even getting his knucles bloody didn't help.

 _Entry 23_  
_Huh, punching people doesn't have the same ~~uforic~~ , ~~eufouric~~ ... Fuck that feeling like on ecstasy....like it use to..._  
_Having sex with him does it tho..._

From across the street a flash of red catches his eye. Turning for a better view he sees Ian, but for the first time seeing the ginger it doesn't make him happy, he's hugging someone, someone in Mickey's mind way more attractive than himself.a dark man thick muscular build. Mick doesn't care about this guy's size or muscle he just knows he's going to have to fight him. Why his thought wasn't to hit Ian he wasn't sure, he didn't actually want to hurt him. But he was hurting therefore someone was getting hurt "Gallagher!" He growled pushing between the two of them. Mickey's hand was already swinging back to hit the guy when he felt Ian's soft hands wrap around his bisep "fuck! What is with you" the brown man taken off guard now changing his stance ready to throw a punch "was this what you meant when you said everyone's got baggage, you can't keep your dick in your pants?" Mickey yelled "it's not what you think" Ian truning Mickey's body so he'd look at him "Caleb is a friend... He's helping he get a job" Mickey looked into those beautiful green eyes ian seemed truthful enough "and you" he turned back to the other man "what you expect in return?" He asked "ay, nothin I just think Ian would be a great ambulance driver so I'm helping him out" he informed Mickey "yeah Caleb is a firefighter so he's got connections to help me out" Ian added "and you don't wanna fuck him"

"No" Ian answered quickly enough but Caleb hesitated and Mickey noticed "nothing in return my ass" he grumbled "you wanna fuck em don't ya" it was a question neither of them really needed to answer "fuck, yeah of course I do, I mean look at him, and he never mentioned a boyfriend " Caleb's honestly shocked Ian "I ain't his boyfriend" the words were out of his mouth before he realized what he said. He hated that someone, someone he didn't know knew his deep dark secret and was saying it loudly. "I mean I--" Mick studdered "so you're not exclusive" Caleb had a glimmer or hope in his eye "no, we might not have talked about it, but I'm not seeing anyone else right now" ian said calmly. As the words reached Mickey's ears a weight was lifted

He also felt like an idiot. "Ah, sorry" he said thinking it was the appropriate thing to say not that he actually meant it "misunderstanding, it's a'right" Caleb gave a side smile. "I'll see ya around Ian" he gave a slight wave, turning and walked away "what the fucks wrong with you" Ian smacked Mickey's back "oy! Fuck off. You said you were spending the day with Mandy then I find you hanging off that guy...." "Hanging off" Ian intrupted "it was a goodbye pat on the back it was barely a god damn hug!"  He corrected "whatever it looked like more" Mickey shrugged "so you really not seeing anyone else" he scruffed his feet not ready to look at Ian, he felt a bit stupid. "Nah, what about you" he asked "yeah I still fuck Angie on the side" he pffted "like I could be fucking anyone else first off you always want it and second ain't no one as good as you Gallagher" he finally looked up a smile across his face. Ian leaned in "don't Fuckin' kiss me" Mickey backed up still uncomfortably with PDA with anyone but with Ian...

"Mickey...." Ian started gently "ya know Terry's not here right... You can be who you're meant to  be... We can really be something but I've been out of the closet for a while I don't want to get dragged back in"

"Are you giving me an ultimatum?" Mickey's eyebrows wrinkled together. "I don't do well with those" what the hell was he saying, he didn't want to lose Ian, his mouth was spewing words before the had a chance to think. But impulse was something Mickey was good at. So he didn't think he steppes closer, grabbed Ian's face pulling him closer locking lips with him "there, ya happy now, can we do home" he asked taking a step back to catch his breath from what he'd just done "you gonna hold my hand" Ian asked with a smirk "don't Fuckin' push it"

_Entry 24_

_Yeah I'm fucking gay_   
_He's my fucking boyfriend,_

 


	12. Chapter 12

"so ambulance driver?" Mickey asked "yeah it seems like it could be a good fit" Ian smiled they were only a few blocks from the house as they sauntered down the road "I'd get to help people it ain't a desk job.." he chuckled "why you wanna help people, I've only wanted to help myself.. and Mandy I guess" Mickey asked. Ian shrugged "I dunno I guess my brother's accidental overdose, mom's attempted suicide makes you feel helpless I don't like being helpless" he sighed "so Lip overdosed?" Ian looked up shaking his head "oh, the other one... Carl? He was kinda badass there for a while I can see how the life of selling drugs turns to doing them, that how he got out? Scared himself sober after that?" Again Ian shook his head Mickey looked confused "you have another brother?" He asked "wait... the fucking baby?" Ian nodded "he was a toddler at the time but yeah..." He sighed "that's fucked up, but he's good now?" Mickey treaded lightly "yeah seems so"

"so that's twice now you've gotten jealous over nothing" Ian pointed out ready for a change of topic "So" Mickey barked "so I think it's time to make it official" is smiled "how?" Mick asked "don't make me put it on like Facebook" he grumbled. Ian laughed "God don't be so old, maybe a selfie posted to Instagram #sofuckinggay or #mygayboyfriend"

"You're not fucking funny" Mickey informed him "oh I am" Ian smiled "all I meant was maybe fucking acknowledge me as your boyfriend in public then you wouldn't have to fight every guy who walks up to me...and though lots of fun hand jobs in public might not be the way to let people know I'm yours" he paused "and Mick I am, I'm yours I'm in this it's not just fucking, I wanna really be with you... And I'm pretty sure you do to..." Ian laid it all out there. Fuck it was everything Mickey was thinking could have wanted to hear, but hearing it made it so terrifyingly real he stood still for a moment nodding trying to find his own words "I like you Gallagher, like really fuckin like you" he glanced up "I've never felt like this for anyone and I sure as shit don't share my feelings so listen to everything god damn word, I meant it when I said you're mine that wasn't just possessive kinky shit... I mean it was-- and it was ... Nevermind what I'm trying to say is you're it." Ian smiled hanging on to every word "just fucking promise me domestic sex won't be boring" Mick added causing them both to laugh breaking the serious mood "let's go find out" Ian grabbing Mickey's hand dragging him in the door

They don't even make it out of the entry way, and he pins Mickey up aginst the door, pushing hard against his face they kiss, hard, Ian tugged on Mickey's lower lip. His hands slide down pulling Mickey's pants down with one hard pull, Mickey's already hard cock popped out. Ian's hands grab hold of Mick's balls adding just enough pressure to make it pleasurable; Mickey groaned, clenching his teeth. It started out like any hand job Mickey was excited for, but Ian was in the mood to show him they'd never be boring he had too many tricks up his sleeve.

His gripped changed from holding in his palm to bending his fingers back engaging his nails "mother fucker" Mick cried out "tell me to stop if you mean it" Ian directed Mickey grunted acknowledging Ian to continue. He nodded pulling at Mickey's thick cock, squeezing. Mickey was biting down on his lower lip while Ian tortured him, yet while his hands were so rough his soft lips were nibbling on his neck.

Ian kneaded Mickey's balls "god damn it ya ain't making bread!" He goraned Ian just smirked knowing if Mickey meant anything by it he'd stop. Still he moved his grip to the tip, softly pinches, this time eminating soft moans from Mickey "ian--" their eyes meet Mickey swallows hard knowing what's about to happen "fucking Christ" Mickey mumbled as he came, shooting down Ian's hand. "What are you Fuckin'smirking for " he huffed "you said not boring, thinking I delivered" Ian wiped his hands on Mickey's jeans seeing as they needed a wash now. He leaned his body into Mickey's opening his mouth allowing Mickey's tounge in.

"Since we don't need to worry about... How'd ya put it ...domestic sex, maybe next thing we could do is a date" Ian smiled "I was actually thinking the next immediate thing to do was you" Mick grinned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick update!   
> J_Q said a date should happen so let's start laying some ground work for that 
> 
> And no journal entry I'm hoping to have the next chapter up tonight that finishes off what Mickey plans on doing! 
> 
> How does Mickey feel what is going on in that head of his .. .hmm got a few ideas but always love hearing from you!


	13. Chapter 13

Mickey's fingers intertwinted in the gingers hair kissing him hard, it was his turn to push him up against the wall. The breathing was hot and heavy still on a high from Ian's little demonstration.  Both let out a moan. Ian's dick is already twitching with excitement, as Mickey lowers himself to his knees, it bobs in front of his lips. Mickey's mouth opens only wide enough for his tounge to slip out just getting a taste of the skin. Going in slow circles around the tip, slowly he allows his mouth to open wider. Mickey feels Ian's long fingers grab into his mess of brown hair, ,pushing him forward, Mick doesn't hesitate allowing Ian to control his head as he moves back and forth, this time the forth nearly gaging him, Mick's hands tighten around Ian's ass grabbing at the cheeks.

"Oh Mick" came a quiet groan from Ian. Now thrusting himself, desperate for more of Mickey's mouth to be around him. It felt as though electricity was sparking through every part of his body.  It wasn't long before there was a jerking release as his muscles went from tight to relaxed. After a moment Mickey stood up brushing his hand across his face. They shared a grin which was abruptly intrupted.

"Fuck! Why's the door locked" Mandy voice cried through the wood door followed by a burst of knocking "anyone in there?" She called out "we never fucking lock the door what the fuck" then came the sound of what they assumed was her kicking the door. The boys looked at each other deciding Ian should open the door he was far less of a mess than Mickey was who chose to run to find a change of clothes

"Mandy hey" Ian smiled opening the door "sorry I got home before you didn't realize you kept the door unlocked" she walked past him with judgy eyes "huh" she huffed "has nothing to do with why it smells like sex in here"

"Nah that's just you" Mickey informed her coming out of his room, to his surprise her first reaction was to sniff herself "you might be right but I still think it was you two!" She claimed "honestly I don't give a fuck what you think" Mickey informed her "and" Ian added "we were honestly just talking about going on a date" he smiled glancing over at Mickey. She squeeled "so this is really happening?!" Mickey reluctantly nodded this is why he didn't tell people things. "Ooo let's plan this out" she dragged Ian to the couch. "Yeah I don't wanna do that I'm gonna grab a smoke and a beer." He informed them

He stepped out onto the back porch lighting his cigarette and placing his beer on the rail. Mickey loves smoking it's not like other people who try it and get hooked, he tried it and loved it. He loved the way the smoke felt exhaling through his mouth or nose, he loves that first deep inhale in the morning or like this one after sex.

He took a drink of beer, a stupid grin on his face. He was fucking happy, stupidly happy. He lifted the cold bottle to his lips, he took a few more gulps of beer. He looked at the beer feeling a lot like it, it was domestic, cheap, and as he downed the last of it empty.

picked up the book and decided to try writing more

 _Entry 25_  
_He has career goals_  
_And wants a date_  
_Like what kind of fucking date_  
_I don't know shit about fancy forks or which one to use when, does he really want that?_  
_Should I have fucking career goals-- local thug isn't gonna pay for this god damn dinner Mandy is gonna have us go on_  
_Who the fuck is Mickey milkovich_  
_A thug_  
_Now a gay thug_  
_I ain't got smarts to be anything else._.  
_He says he wants me but he doesn't realize I got nothing_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short and a bit sad and it probably could have been added to the last chapter since they are so heavily connected but look at it this way it's two in one!! 
> 
> Also I may have done a thing... I may have opened a bottle of wine!! Oh the fun we can have!!
> 
> Comment away darlings


	14. Chapter 14

"No you can't wear that" Mandy informed her brother "why the fuck not" Mickey asked already having three of the buttons done up "because it'll clash" she informed him "with what you're the one that fucking told me this was a good colour for me!" He yelled not believing how gay he sounded "yeah but you'll clash with your boyfriend! Hello his orange hair this red shirt just take it off" she instructed. He grumbled curses taking off his shirt "why do people even do this shit?" He mumbled "what dress up?" She asked tossing everything he owed on to the bed; which honestly wasn't that much three dress shirts in total. "No all of it... So why do we have to go on a fucking date we already know we like each other why I got to spend money on it? So strangers who's option don't matter to me know that I like em?" He ranted

"You just do!" She sighed passing him a shirt and tie "it's like social protocol or something, plus he'll like it, you can be kinda harsh so do this one nice thing"

"What the fuck are you making me wear?" He intrupted her "I ain't going to a funeral, black shirt and a black tie, I'll look stupid" he fussed with the tie "you'll look fucking hot now shut up" Mandy fixed his tie.

***

"So, ah, you like this place?" Mickey asked after the pretentious host showed them to their stupid small table, "I dunno I guess, it is pretty fancy" Ian admitted glancing around it had been the most romantic restaurant he'd ever been in. All Mickey could see was how snooty everyone looked, how stupid dim lights made it difficult to read the menu, that there was too many utensils on the table. How out of place he felt.

"Why the fuck is the water in a wine glass?" Mickey asked putting the glass down disappointed. He cleared his throat "so whatda we talk about" Ian smiled "just calm down. You're wound up to tight" they were interrupted by their waiter "good evening can I start you off with anything from our wine menu?" He asked in the most arrogant voice. Ian maybe sensing Mickey would say something that could kick them out or maybe just needing Mickey to know he didn't expect this to be bloody expensive answered "we'll have the 2010 Pinot noir" the waiter nodded they both knew it was one of the cheapest options "and what shall we start with"

"Nah we'll just order, I'll have the steak, rare" Mickey stated "actually the chef prefers to cook the meat to a perfect med--" he was cut off from his spiel "actually" Mickey started "you are a server, so serve me what I fucking ordered I don't give a fuck what the chef wants to eat, if I wanna eat the meat fresh off the damn cow you'll give me a fork and knife and point me to the damn pasture" his voice become louder than the waiter and Ian would like "yeah sir" the waiter nodded politely "and you sir "I'll also have the steak.. rare" he tried not to smirk as the waiter slinked off to the kitchen "so you're gonna eat the meat off the fucking cow?" He asked "well fuck don't tell me how someone else wants it" Mickey sighed "god damn people think they're know it alls just cause they got a fancy tie on" he rolled his eyes loosening his own

Thank God they didn't order salad or soup or anything else that would have required Mickey to use the tiny silverware on the table. 1. He would have no idea the appropriate one to use and 2. He'd feel like a giant with the tiny fork in his hand. He was actually thrilled to see a regular steak knife come with his meal cutlery he could use! "So what are we suppose to do on this date?" He asked before placing a large peice of cow in his mouth. Ian shrugged "get to know each other I guess" he smiled softly "I thought we did that already, what else?" He spoke from the side of his mouth ensuring no food spat out onto his boyfriend "no come on, why don't you talk, you only ever talk about the past tell me about what you want to do, you listened to me sound crazy wanting to be an EMT "

"That wasn't crazy…yer gonna be really good at that, what am I gonna do?" He asked "unless" he could feel the light bulb go off in his head "anytime you get a call of an old dying dude you could let me know and then I can rob them, fucking estate sales are huge right now" he smiled actually impressed with his idea. "All you think about is screwing over other people ?" Ian asked a slight chuckle to lighten the topic "yeah I guess since all I've done since I got here is figure out three ways to dine and dive this joint" he admitted "really" Ian glanced around "I only saw two"

"Lemme guess the front door and the back?" He didn't give Ian much credit "oh no I thought front door was off limits with the hostess, and usually a manager is close to the front" his statement shocked Mickey this kid actually wasn't so vanilla "so the way I see it, you could probably get out by going to the washroom... Or ... If you were ballsy enough you could go out the front claming wallet was in the car... No too stupid they'd see that... But you could say the wallet was in the jacket at coat check and there's an employees only door there to slip out of" he smiled satisfied with the answer "not bad Gallagher" Mickey smiled "bathroom always a good guess, I like the employee door, I was gonna go with the kitchen door after demanding--pushing my way to the back to have a word with the cook" Ian laughed "that is actually believeable ... But we aren't doing that tonight right?" Mickey shugged "I think it might liven up the night but if you don't want to"

"Nah, you're right" Mickey leaned back in the chair not giving Ian the change to answer. "I'm sorry" he sighed "I don't do this, dates, fancy Fuckin' clothes" he explained "Im more of a beers on the couch, House parties, not these great gestures" he admitted "ok" Mick was surprised by Ian's laid-back response "next time let's do that" he nodded "really" he must have sounded too shocked based on Ian's reactions "yeah really, I'm gay not a high maintenance girl" he pointed out. "places like this it's nice but I don't need this all the time" Mickey nodded damnit could this guy get any better.

"Then since we're doing this whole fancy fucking date thing let's order dessert...I'll even use the fucking tiny fork they give us"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> J_Q asked for a date so here's a date


	15. Chapter 15

Mickey's hands were interlaced with Ian's as they walked down the dim lit street. The dinner was actually really nice; no the company was nice, the restaurant was stuffy and annoying, but the food was ok. Mickey could believe how much he liked being around Ian, he was caught up just looking at the ginger he didn't even realize there were other people on the street

"Oy, lookit a couple of fags" some jackass from behind them yelled. "Which one ya think is more gay" "hey which one of ya takes it in the ass like a fucking pussy" he yelled Mickey's blood boiled but before he when had a chance to turn around Ian was already yelling back "Fuckin' come say that to my face ya shithead"

Mickey was actually impressed Ian didn't back down from a fight hell he was actually starting it by the sounds of it. He would have gladly defended Ian's honour but kinda loved that he was his own badass. Mickey was already closing the gap, he didn't care for the chit chat he cared about throwing punches, he only needed to take four swift steps his fist swung hard hitting the guy in the jaw,

After stumbling backwards the guy rubbed his guy "not a bad punch for a queer, you won't be getting another shot in" he shifted his jaw. Mickey huffed this guy was drunk and cocky he could easily take him. Except for the cold hard metal  thing that hit the back of his head.  
**Tink**  
Mickey stumbled trying not to fall flat on the pavement, with his blurred vision he saw red swing. He hit hard the guy fell like instantly.

Shaking his head, Mick sniffed got enough focus to grab the collar, the fabric tight in his grip, he punched, the guy's head going back like a yo-yo Everytime meeting Mickey's fist. Mickey could feel the material tearing with each yank. The guys face almost so bloody you wouldn't be able to see his features. "Mickey come on" Ian rushed over "that's enough, he's had enough" pulling on Mickey's arm "he wouldn't" Mickey growled "you telling me he would have stopped"

"But you're better than he is" Ian informed him "the thing is I ain't" giving a final punch the guy laying in a puddle on the ground "come on I'll take you to the hospital" Ian placed Mickey's arm over his shoulder " no hospital, Mandy can fix this up, she's use to it" he said hearing it out loud he felt almost ashamed.

***

"What the fuck kinda date did you two have?" Mandy asked see the sate of them "what did you do?" She asked examining his head "me, he fucking started it" he yelped "yeah right" Mandy rolled her eyes "no I did I mean Mickey threw the first punch but yeah I should I should have ignored them, sorry" he sighed glancing at Mickey who obviously had gotten the worst of it.

It was then that Mickey realized the only indication that Ian had that's he'd been in a fight was a split lip "so you can fight huh" Mickey decided it was back to the get to know you part of the date in shrugged "when I was a teen I was gonna be an ROTC... Plus I had Frank, ya learn to throw a punch either way" Ian informed him watching Mandy stitch up her brother "so why are you like a nurse or something?" Ian asked her "me, fuck no bandaging up idiots all day no Thanks" "fuck you" Mickey muttered to her " I dunno my neighbour Vi does some kind of nursing shit at an old folks home, she takes tons of drugs cause old people can't remember" Ian informed her "Mick that's kinda a brilliant job right?" "Yeah you gotta actually make it through school first though" he said crushing her new dream in one sentence

"Yeah ok I think that's enough" he pulled away "yeah you're welcome, now get yourself cleaned up" she huffed "so you wanna get a beer and tell me about the rest of the date?" She asked "till Mick gets back sure"

Mickey sat in the living room waiting for the dizzy feeling to subside before changing his very bloody shirt  
  
_Entry 26_  
_Fuck_  
_Date #1_  
_Don't think this counts as a success_  
_I dunno street fight defend your honour that's some ~~shiveroius~~ ~~chiverious~~ fuck.. fucking  knight shit _  
_I dunno the dinner was decent I fucking paid so that's a personal victory_  
_I dunno I did learn more about him_  
_I dunno why does he keeps wanting us to have normal fucking jobs_  
_I dunno I might have a concussion_

_***_

The night winded down Mandy crashed and the two were alone again. "Just so you know it was... It was fucking hot that you know how to use your fists, not needing saving" Mickey admitted "if you think that was hot you should see what else I can do with my fists"

"Wh-What?" Mick studdered. He knew what is was suggesting he just wasn't too sure about it, but there was something about the red head that made him trust him.

"You'll like it" Ian smiled. Mickey nodded. The two didn't waste time losing their clothes; shirts flying  through the air, pants hitting the ground. Lips locked, they were hot and heavy jetting tounges in and out ,unable to keep their hands off each other  Mickey could feel Ian's dick start to throb near his. He moaned 

"On your hands and knees" Ian instructed, Mick did as he was told. Ian grabbed the lube drenching his hand, he slowing nudged his finger on Mickey's hole, slowly he inserted his long finger. Mickey grunted this he knew this was familiar, this he liked. Soon a second finger made its way through. Twisting and turning his fingers to make room for the thrid finger to slide in, followed closing by the fourth. Now with all four digits Ian began. Bending his knuckles stretching further than they've done before.

Ian had finally made his way in up to his thumb he curled his fingers pushing agisnt Mickey's prostate. Mickey hummed a slow creak of a cuss rolled out of his lips "fuck"

Rotating his hand back and forth slowly, thrusting slightly further . Mickey gasped he couldn't believe this was happening, the pain the euphoria, the exhilaration "yes" he moaned. He never begged for sex but with Ian he wanted to test his limits, he'd let him so anything to him. 

Ian manages to slip in thumb in, now he was fully fisting him.  Slowing pushing himself in finding that rhythm, then pushing it further, going faster

The realization that a fucking fist was in his ass, had him ready to come. It was so fucking good, so fucking hard, so filling. His ass is throbbing, his body started to quiver "oh god" he nutters before finishing seconds later "uh, god sorry, I didn't even do you" Mick admitted as Ian slowly, oh so very slowly started removing his hand from Mick's ass "are you kidding me, that was fucking hot I've already fished down my fucking leg" he informed him "I'm gonna hop through the shower" Mickey grunted waving him off "I'mma lie here for a minute" his body collapsing

_Entry 27_

_If that's how the date ends I change my previous thought it was fucking perfect._

_I'm litterally his puppet_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I think that finishes off date number 1 
> 
> Next I guess we should go see the shrink   
> What are her thoughts shall she dive into the date  
> Should we make her get Mickey on the "real job" banwagon?! 
> 
> And as always any other thoughts are always welcome.


	16. Chapter 16

Mickey woke up early, he must of fallen asleep waiting for ian to get out of the shower last night. He sat up, fuck his ass hurt. Worth it. He thought as he watched Ian sleep, this guy was amazing. How the fuck did he get so lucky. He slinked out of bed.

Stepping into the shower the hot water hitting down on his head, so rarely did he get hot showers with Mandy using all the hot water in her marathon long showers. Mickey let his head drop, closing her eyes he listened to the sound of the water bouncing off the tile floor. Steam was starting to fill the room he breathed in the heavy air

Mickey was lost in the relaxation he didn't hear Ian wake up, or come into the washroom, or even piss, it wasn't till the temperature changed as Ian pulled back the curtin steeping into the shower. "Fuck" Mickey snapped out of his daze "I could have fallen and fuckin died what are you doing sneaking into my shower" he asked rubbing the water from his face. "Thought it would have been obvious" Ian smirked glancing down at his hard on.  "Nah, you coming in here, means it's fuckin my turn" softly pushing Ian agisnt the tile wall. Ian's back arched as the cool tiles pushed on his shoulder. He shivered because of the cold or because of the sight of Mickey lowering his body down. He had a small grin on his face as Mickey was on his knees.

Mickey was going to torment the ginger the way he had done to him so many times. He was face to face with Ian's throbbing cock, every teasing breath he took caused it to twitch.  "don't be such a fucking tease" Ian groaned. Looking down at Mick's shiny black  hair with water droplets resting on top.

Mickey's placed his hand on the wet tile to support himself. He opened his mouth putting all of the large cock in his mouth, his head bobbed back and forth. god he hoped he was doing this right he did people fucking fool around in the shower trying to breath through his nose and not inhale water, and still give s fucking unforgettable blowjob. He gives it a harsh suck and tries looking up so he can relish the way Ian's neck arches, Mickey's vision is blurry from the water but he can see the pleasure on reds face.

Mickey seriously doesn't seem to have a gag reflex as he lunges further taking him to the hilt. Ian moans. He can feel him twitch as mickey continues to tease pulling back a little, making circles with his tongue around the head, before engulfing him again . Ian's breathing is growing more rapid. There was a few more grunts before Ian finishes, his warmth filled Mickey mixing with the warm water. Mick sputtered slightly before standing. Ian was still getting over the orgasm panting heavily. Their lips met water dripping down their lips into their mouths as their tounges danced together. The water was only slightly warm now so Mickey gazing at Ian said "think it's time to get out" he turned his face to the water giving it a final wash with his hand then turned the taps till the water came to a stop.

An hour! How the fuck did that quick shower turn into an hour. "I gotta go" he informed Ian "shrink stuff, meet up after" he asked desperately hoping the answer was yes. "Yeah, I think I'm gonna go get started on my EMT stuff, but that shouldn't be long" he stated "yeah alright." Mick said simply not wanting to ask about the fireman who he was sure going to be the one to help Ian. Mickey leaned in for another kiss when they heard mandy "mother fuckers!"

"You two used all the hot water and ya ain't even clean!" She bitched storming back into her room

"Bye" Mickey smiled rushing out the door for now he was surely going to be late.

Rushing in Mickey tossed the book at the poor unsuspecting receptionist "tell her I'm here" he huffed collapsing on the chair. The small slightly terrified receptionist got up taking the book to the back. Mickey was impressed with only being four minutes late. The doctor made him wait an additional twenty minutes. "She'll see you now" the receptionist said in a voice just slightly louder than a whisper

"What the fuck Liz what took so long?" He asked "a lot to read" she states simply "well what ya gotta say about it this time?" He huffed taking a seat in her office. "Can we start with the first entry" she asked which of course didn't matter what he said that's where they were going to start. And honesty Mickey had no idea what he'd said since the last time they met, he gave a slight nod so she's start talking "you start by saying violence doesn't have the same euphoric experience it once had" he glanced up at him see if he agreed or maybe to see if he remembered saying it. Mickey nodded once more "that's wonderful mickey, that is personal growth, that is what a judge is going to want to see" she informed him smiling

"but" her smile faded

" A few entries later there was a fight? What was that about?" She finally asked a question he could answer. He started with a shrug "couplea guys called us fags, I ain't going to fucking stand for that" he informed her. She nodded "so you went out on a date, you were _out_ in public" she emphasize the word. "Yeah what can I say I'm fuckin coming outta my shell" he was snarky he was still mad at her from their last session

"let's go back in the book" she thumbed through the pages "you actually acknowledge being gay, that is --as you put it -- coming out of your fucking shell" her words caused him to laugh, any time curses came from her he found it humorous, when he cursed people expected it, he used the word fuck like a comma, but Liz she was a classy fuckin broad, who didn't seem like the type to cuss all that often. "How does it feel not to just acknowledge it to the world but to yourself?" 

Fuck. How was he supposed to answer that?  awkward emotional questions posted to him made him have the automatic reaction to shrug. This is not how he did emotions it's why the damn journal was working he didn't have to say shit out loud. "Ok.." she could feel the tension. "just tell me about him"

Now that made Mickey smile and in doing so made him feel stupidly in love he cleared his throat and the smile off his face "he's good, and unlike your comment last week I think he's good for me" he informed the doctor "I would like to apologize for that and upon further reading I would agree as I see here on a number of entries 25 which I would like to circle back to, and also 26 you mention real or normal jobs?"

"Yeah he wants to help people, 'Magine that I'm with someone that wants to help people.. and he told mandy she should help people be a nurse or someone who patches people up" he rolled his eyes "why do you dismiss that, your sister has looked after all the men in your family, we both know she's done more stitches and resetting a dislocated bone then most first year med students" Liz pointed out, though she's never met any other milkovich their reputation had made the rounds.

"I dunno, no one in our family does shit. Fuck I'm still shocked Mandy's not a fucking hooker or somethin'" he admitted "not like Terry instilled good morals in us"

"So is that why you don't think you're anything but a thug?" She asked.

Fucking deep questions "yeah, I guess" he reached  his arm back scratching his head. "Look at my file, no one is gonna hire someone with a file let alone one that fuckin big" he sighed "I don't have any damn skills, and if I did I don't looks very inviting" making a first showing off his knuckle tats. "Those were your choices Mr. Milkovich you choose those tattoos, you choose your clothes " Liz  pointed out. "I ain't no Bible thumper I ain't wearing a button up shirt and tie"

"I'm not sure what religion has to play in the attire but.." she trailed off knowing it wasn't a helpful topic

"I know it sounds like I'm asking you to change, and yes I am, but it's for your own good, for a better life." She sighed "this guy sees something in you, he's trying to make a life for himself and if he wants you in it I think you need to find a way to make that work" she outstretched her hand holding the book "keep writing you're really breaking through, but try to write down possible and legal jobs you'd honestly want to do."

"There is more I'd love to talk to you with but that's all our time"

"Ya know Lizzy this wasn't terrible"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prehaps this chapter would have come sooner but I was informed there needed to be Mickey rocking Ian so here's a bit of that and a lot of therapy 
> 
> Thoughts comments suggestions all welcome


	17. Chapter 17

When Mickey got home no one was there. He crashed on the couch expecting to relax, but his brain would not shut off. Ian wasn't here, that meant he was with that Caleb guy, which kept coming back to what could they be doing. Yeah Ian said he wasn't a cheater, but the fireman already said he was interested, he could be forcing himself on him, or they could just be hitting it off laughing having a good time planning Ian's perfect fucking life.

He stood up he needed to do something he needed to get his mind off all these hypothetical situations.going to the kitchen he filled the sink up with soapy water. he placed a cigarette in him mouth lighting it he took a few quick puffs, shifting it in his lips to have it off to the side, he let it rest there while he began to wash some dishes. Obviously this was not something he nor Mandy did all that often.

He's only made it a few dishes in before he realized this was not keeping his mind off things, about the time when he broke the glass after thinking about the hunky fireman being so close to Ian, probably breathing on his neck as he looked over his shoulder at paper work or something. "Fuck" Mickey cursed throwing the broken glass away

_Entry 27_

_Ain't going to be a dishwasher fucking broke a cup._  
_Don't want some low level, get treated like a fuckin slave kinda job anyway._

 _•I don't wanna fucking help people I want to help myself_  
_•Make money_  
_•not a damn desk job, no fucking ties_

_• there was a bartender in town he had an ice cream truck... Wait no he sold drugs outta that...but I guess a food truck seems kinda cool, own hours, definitely no tie. Can I even fucking cook tho?_

_•maybe Mandy would be good in a medical field fuck i gotta apologize.. dont think either of us have the best side manner but if either of us can fake it, it's her._

_• I could be a fucking school counselor scare the damn kids into living a decent life, not being a fuck up like me who can't even think of a real fucking legal job I could do. But it might require ties_

The door opened and Mickey tossed the book away for the first time being worried his sister or boyfriend would want to read his words. Being gay might have been hard to write down it may have even been nerve wreaking to have Mandy read, but that's what he was and he was coming to terms with that and what it looked like. But being a thug with no ambition to be anything else that was down right shameful.

"Hey" Mandy smiled as she walked in "hey" he responded "did you fucking clean?" She asked looking around at a house which to anyone would still look messy, but to her she could see dishes were moved "I tried, didn't work out so well" Mick muttered "so why were you cleaning?" She pried "has he ever mentioned... Never fuckin mind" he growled "who Ian? Mention what?"

Mickey sighed as much as he would never mention it he liked his sister and her option; for the most part. " Has he mentioned a firemen" he fisnlly spit it out Mandy sat down next to him "yeah, bit into that he's gonna help him get a job" she said things Mickey already knew "I know he met him before you two were a thing, but I don't think anything happened if that's what you're looking into"she added, Mickey shrugged it was what he was looking for but he also didn't like sounded like a girl.

"Hey Mandy" he sighed he was about to talk about fucking feelings "I think I gotta say sorry...Ian gave you a legit job, something you could fucking do, and I was an ass"

"You're always an ass" she gave him a side smirk. Obviously use to his deminor. "There's no way I can do schooling for that, you were right"

"ah, fuck don't say that, ya know you're probably the smartest one of us, if you wanna try go do it" he nudged her arm; the closest to an affection touch he was going to give her right now.

The two talked for hours adding booze and pizza to their conversation about what she could do, how she really was good at stitching people up from a bar fight. "Mickey..." Mandy said slowly putting down the beer "we've been thinkin' about this all wrong" she sat up visibly excited about her thoughts "we've been trying to figure out how to be upstanding citizens... That shits not going to happen, but you're good at taking people's money and beating people who don't pay, and in a weird way that makes you a good business guy..." She was rambling and Mickey was not following "what if we ran our own hospital" she smacked his arm with giddy. "A hospital?" He shook his head "that don't even make sense mands" he knew he was crushing her dreams again "no not like a real hospital but like a place for drunks and thugs to get stitched up without having to worry about a record, or stupid hospital fees, we charge just enough to make it desirable for everyone, I stitch them up you make sure they pay up!"

Mickey shook his head "no fucking way, you think I'd let you put yourself in that much fucking danger. I get what you wanna do and I'm sure that's good for someone but it ain't gonna be you"

"Fuck you Mickey" holding back tears "you are an ass and it was a damn good idea" she stood up

_Entry 28_

_What kind of idea is that makes shift hospital for drunks_  
_She thinks cause she can do a few stitches she can handle an entire business_  
_Fuck_  
_Then I'm the bad guy for not going along with the illegal and definitely dangerous idea._  
_Fuck maybe this book is making me soft._  
_Mandy's fuckin smart enough to know it's probably a gold mine ..._  
_Fuck_  
_Well I ain't tellin you if I'm gonna do it or not now am I_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I know ya'll needed another chapter   
> And some Mickey Mandy time seemed like a good idea   
> And if you like the idea of a shady hospital worker you should all jump over to the fic HIT ME cause it's awesome and in later chapters there's actually a doctor character similar to Mandy's idea 
> 
> I'd also like to add I'm not stealing anyone's ideas or words by suggesting Mandy's hospital idea 
> 
> Like always comments are welcome.


	18. Chapter 18

Mickey fell asleep on the couch, sometime after Mandy stormed off. It wasn't until he heard the turn of the door that he was awoken. Mickey milkovich does not do well with being started awake "who the fucks there" he grumbled

"Sorry Mick, it's me" came the fimilar voice "what time is it Gallagher" already changing his grumpy tone. "Late and I'm sorry but your place was closer and I really just want to crash" Ian informed him. "Yeah, No, it's fine come in" he rubbed his face "you good?" He asked "fine I guess" shrugging off the question. "No ya ain't so what is it"

Ian sighed "I just got back from Caleb's..." He hates to admit "fuck em?" Mickey was blunt and not in the mood "No, I mean he tried but..." Ian started "I'll kill em" he blurted "calm the fuck down" Ian raised his voice "I can take care of myfuckingself." He reminded "he seems to think only sex is cheating..."

"So he kiss you or somethin'?" Mick nodded not enjoying a word he was hearing but having a good idea where things were going. Ian nodded "I didn't tho Mick, I fuckin swear. He's fucked up man he thinks he can do that, he thinks going after someone who's taken is ok, fuck he thinks having sex with woman don't count as cheating either"Ian was starting to ramble obviously nervous about the situation, about how Mick would respond. "Don't see him again" Mickey said simply "what? But he's--" Ian was cut off "I ain't telling you how to live your life, but I think your fucking smart enough to get the job on your own, I think he's saying he's trying to help you just to spend time with you and if he already fucking tried something he's gonna try for more" Mickey laid it all out there. "Ok" Ian agreed "can we just go to bed deal with this in the morning?" He asked "no" Mickey told him, Ian's heart started to race was Mickey about to fucking loss his shit.

"we don't gotta deal with. We're good." Mickey explained Ian smiled softly "but in the morning maybe talk with mandy. Shockingly shes fucking pissed at me, but you got her thinking a medical career..so..." He trailed off not sure what else to say about the matter. "Yeah I can do that Mick"

Ian started to walk to Mickey's room "you coming" he turned back seeing Mick still sitting "yeah I'm coming, but I'm going to fucking sleep Gallagher keep your fucking hands to yourself" he instructed getting up and walking past him "what! not even a cuddle?" Ian smirked "go the fuck to sleep"

****

"...It's fucking dangerous that's why..." Mickey woke up hesring Ian and Mandy fighting "when did you turn into a pussy?" She called him out "you weren't always this by the book what the fuck changed? " Mandy demanded to know "I realized there's more to life than being a stupid kid, stealing, and running from the cops" he yelled back "fine you fucking do that, but you don't get a say in my life, you don't get to judge me! Fucking best friend my ass"

"Mandy..." His voice lowered whimpered like a hit puppy "no if you're too fucking good for us now why do you even bother being here"

Shit. Fuck. Mickey rolled out of the bed it was time to break up their little spat that sounded like any moment Mandy was gonna break up with him for the both of them "what the fuck is all the screaming mands I was fuckin sleepin."

"Did you tell him to tell me it was a stupid idea?" She turned her anger on her brother "I never said it was stupid" Ian muttered

"Fuck to your corners the both of ya" he yelled louder than he wanted before even having coffee. "Mandy it's a fucking brillent idea, can probably be very lucrative...." He was cut off "don't fucking tell me it's dangerous!" She yelled "did you ever think that I'm just as much a milkovich as you are. People won't hurt me Mick, especially if I'm the one patching them up. Plus that's why I was trying to ask you to help me, you'd be a great bouncer or repo man or whatever the person is who gets the money" she sighed it was like talking to a brick wall when Mickey made up his mind. But this time there seemed to be a glimmer of hope he liked the idea she just had to keep pushing "you know in highschool they called me MilkoBitch I don't take shit from anyone"

"Ok mandy but this won't be high school, this will drunks, addicts and God knows who else" Ian pipped up again. "And how is that different from anyone Terry has ever had over here?" She in lighten him "she's right...." Mickey started to side with his sister "what I thought you were against it" Ian confused looked between the two of them "I am, or I was, I don't god damn know…"

Mandy's mood changed seeing she was getting her brother to agree "no it's good" she smiled at Mickey "I swear to fuckin God it'll be good" she leaned into her brother "just go make the damn coffee, and I'll think about it" nudging her off him "what about you, you good?" He asked Ian who shrugged "what the fuck was the point in me talking to her, you wanted me to talk to her just so you two could gang up on me?" Mick could hear the hurt in his voice "fuck no." Mickey sighed

"She's my sister, yeah I don't want her to get hurt, and if she was going at it alone I wouldn't let her...but I can't let her go it alone so it's gotta be me, I don't trust anyone else to take care of her... And I don't want to do it. I wanna do some shit you'd fucking be proud of me for something you could show off to all the stuck up business friends you're going to have, but it ain't me and I'm sorry. I'm not much more than a thug" Mickey laid his heart and soul out; he's never done that before, it was fucking terrifying.

"You're a lot more than a thug" Ian started "you're trying so damn hard to be something for everyone, just do what makes you happy. Fuck I know I got a legal job, I never meant you had to..." Ian gazed into Mickey's peircing blue eyes "and I'll be proud show you off no matter what I fucking love you" the words slipped out of his mouth. Ian stood in fear for what he'd just done.

Mickey cleared his throat "you what.." his heart was racing it was one thing to think it, hell Mickey almost wrote it down once. But there's a moment in every relationship when you know it, for Mickey that was after their night of drinking at the time he just blamed it on being drunk. Then there's the moment you want to say it and you don't which was after the date, after the amazing sex. Theres the moment you hear it which was happening right now and Mickeys left with the choice of responding or continue standing there gawking trying to absorb the information

Mickey felt he needed to say more so it didn't just sound like he was saying it just for the sake of saying it. "I don't know how to fucking tell you…" maybe it wasn't the best pausing point because Ian was starting to look worried "I'm not good with words, I might be worse with feelings..." He gazed into Ian's eyes, which just made this that much harder to get out "three fucking words it's both too much and not enough. You might be the best thing that's ever happened to me." He gave a soft smile trying desperately not to get choked up. "I'm not worthy of you but you seem to think so, so I'll take it. I'll try to be better for you, I ain't making any promises on that one though" he let a small chuckled escape his lips "Gallagher.." he cleared his throat again "Ian, I love you."

Mickey didn't remember moving closer maybe he hadn't maybe it was Ian coming closer but the two bodies pushed together, there was a long passionate kiss, Mickey held in face not wanting the moment to end.

"Fuck you two are adorable!" Mandy was still there. Fuck. Mickey turned around "and you didn't sense maybe there was a moment happening here and giving us a damn minute?" He asked his sister "and miss that, I'm near in tears Mick I didn't think you had it in you" she placed her hand over her heart "oh fuck off"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He looooves him!!  
> That's all  
> Night!
> 
> Don't forget to leave comments and love!


	19. Chapter 19

Entry _29_  
_I love him_  
_Fuck I actually said that_  
_To his face_  
_That was terrifying_  
_And wonderful_  
_And how much of a fucking girl am I, writing that I love him and that i was damn near giddy that he said he loves me._

On a high from all that emotion the two sneek off into Mickey's room. Mick can feel his heart ready to jump out of his chest, he's never loved anyone before. He knew he was an asshole, who pushed people away, he knew he was definitely possessive of Ian,  but he never realized how powerful those words felt. He loved him.

Mickey was nervous, why the fuck was he nervous they'd had sex before, they'd have a fuck ton of kinky sex so why was being close to Ian now so heart racing, stomach turning. He wasn't gay enough to say it was because they were going to make love.  He needed to fucking get out of his head and just do what he knew he wanted to do.

  
Placing his hand on the back of Ian's head and pulling him closer. Their lips came together, they fit and knew just were to go. Mickey relaxed into the kiss any tension he had melted away with Ian's touch. The kisses were soft, just a gentle brushing of the lips and a caress of a tongue. Mickey's fingers grabbing the small red hairs on the back of Ian's head.

At some point they manage to get each other’s clothes off. To touch each other skin was electric, Mickey ran the backs of his fingers down Ian's arms, while Ian's reached up Mickey's back his nails gently clawing at the backs of his shoulders. feeling Ian nuzzled into Mick's neck applying soft kisses that make him moan. Ian's tounge glides over the collar bone, the feeling of teeth slowly emurging grabbing flesh between them applying pressure before releasing.

The sensation was driving Mickey wild, arching his head back so Ian would life his head. Mick's kisses were now deep and open they’d both have to come up gasping for air; Their breathing harsh as they force the air out of their noses. Mick softly tosses is onto the bed leaning in ontop of him. Their bodies pulsing, their chests inhaling and exhaling together, all Mickey wanted to do was kiss ian. He kissed his soft lips, trailing down his shoulders across his nipple, down to his hips. Mickey licked his lips slowly closing his mouth over Ian's cock. Mick hums vibrate causing Ian to gasp out. He bobs slowly, deeply, his tounge pushing against the bottom of the cock.   
Suddenly he could taste the sweet warmth of pre cum. Mickey slowly lifted off, bringing his gaze back to Ian.

They'd had sex before, so easily Ian could have teased Mickey but tonight wasn't about holding back, it was about giving everything. Ian flipped Mickey over onto all fours.

Riding him slowly, every move ian made was rhythmic, deep, causing them both to moan. Leaning his body in causing him to go deeper but it was worth it to have his lips touch Mickeys skin, kissing his back, his shoulder, Mick groaned, Ian panted he was close, he couldn't do this slow passionate sex any more, his hands squeezed his hip thrusting himself his pace quickened He only needs to thrusts a few more times, before his head is thrown back as he finished. He rocks a fee more times before slowly slipping out.

Ian tugs on Mickey's hips guiding him to lay on his back. Wasting no time he lowers his head to Mickey's very swollen cock. Mickey was already close just having the ginger that close to him could have made him come. He swirls his tongue over the head, his tongue brushing against the sensitive skin underneath. Mickey grabbed hold of Ian's bright red hair, his body trebling ready to give in. His whole body gets tense as he comes. Ian swallows him.

After a moment Ian shifts back up onto the bed resting his head down on Mickey's chest. Mick's arms move automatically to hold him close. He leaned his cheek ontop the red hair

He was happy, he was content, he was... Cuddling. Unsurprisingly Mickey wasn't the one for after sex cuddling, but until Ian he also wasn't the one to say I love you to anyone. He laid there in the bliss of it all. "You good" Ian broke the silence "better than good" Mick kissed the top of Ian's head.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short and later than I said it would be   
> Sorry  
> Also writing loving, slow gentle sex is hard lol let's get back to kink later
> 
> So what's gonna happen now?  
> we love Ian *gasps* shock I know   
> Mandy needs to see if she can be a black market hospital of sorts.   
> And Mickey's gonna help  
> How's therapy going to go  
> What else is going on in Mickey's head??!


	20. Chapter 20

The next few days were a blur of clam, loving moment with Ian with bursts of loud interruptions from Mandy 

"I found it Mick" Mandy voice yelled through the house, even though the two of them were sitting on the couch in front of her. Upon seeing them she explained she found the perfect place to patch people up; was a small rundown hall or church, to be honest Mickey didn't really listen. He did recall it was a good location close to bars and a good distance between the sketchy areas of town but close enough to main Street that it shouldn't be too many issues.

The next time Mandy ran in with information she didn't even seem to care that the two men were under the sheets, "ok so I contacted you're friend V" she nodded to Ian "she's hooking me up with a starter supply but I'll have to find my own means after this." She was bouncing with excitement "great, fine, get out" Mickey barked

The last time she rushed in they were in domestic bliss cooking together; ok more accurately Ian was cooking and Mickey was doing what ian told him which was currently cutting vegetables.   
"I'm ready!" She announced. "You sure?" Mickey asked completely skeptical. "Yes" she replied rolling her eyes "I've got a place, supplies and even spread the word, V's husband is that guy that works at that shitty bar ... Shit what's it called, the Alamo...no the alibi yeah that's it!" She smiled "yeah so he's gonna let anyone there know"

"Fuck tell Frank, he'll keep ya in business" Ian muttered from the oven "actually, yeah tell Frank" he lifted his head up "hes a drunk and a deadbeat but he does keep company with the people you're looking for" he shrugged going back to stirring his pot.

"I'm so glad you're helping,I was hoping..." She wrapped her arm around his neck "you'd be my medical supplies ,supplier!"

"You want me to steal from the job I don't have yet?" He asked "well, yeah!"

"And how do you know I'll get the job?" He asked "cause ya took the damn test" Mickey responded first "you know you did well and they'd be fucking idiots if they didn't take you" in his own way it was one of the sweetest things he's said, and Ian knew it, he smiled "maybe, I dunno, I don't wanna fuck this up" Ian told her "but as stupid and dangerous as it is, it makes sense for people who can't afford a hospital... As long as you are only doing minor things!" He ordered "then I'll help out when I can" 

_Entry 30_  
_Are things fucking working out_  
_The last few days have been effortless_  
_When the fuck is the other shoe gonna drop?_

"Alright you two figure shit out, ,Mandy I'll meet you there tonight I gotta go to the shrink" he informed them standing up he glided over to ian wrapping an arm around him pulling him in for a kiss "see ya later" he smiled fuck he was happy.

***  
"Thank you for taking my suggestion and thinking of the career options" the doctor smiled "I ain't sayin I'll do any of em..."  "No but just taking the time to think of them, write them down ... I'm proud of you Mickey"  she smiles feeling like she was breaking through. So often cases like Mickey's don't end well, they don't put in the time, they end up back in jail, or worse. But Mickey was he was trying, so maybe she could help him turn his life around.

"I am worried though, is you sister seriously going to do this and are you supporting her?" Liz asked "No, this isn't Bout Mandy." He barked "but I think it is, you're the one that mentioned her you're the one that talks about her career ambitions, potentially joining her... I'm just following up on your entries.." she pointed out; which didn't sit well with Mickey "listen Lizzy" he hissed "I know her plan is dangerous, I know you don't approve, trust me I've heard it I've said it I'm tired of God damn talking about it" he spoke louder "but Mr Milkovich, this endeavor wouldn't be good for you" she leaned forward resting her arms on her knees "you may not see it, but your records so far would impress any judge, you could be off parole as early as next month, but this kind of entry this type of work, it's going to throw you into bad habits, it's going to risk your freedom" she tries to scare him into getting away from this.

Nothing was going to change Mickey's mind he was doing this for his sister, she had a way with him, hell it seemed she had a way with everyone if she really did convince red to help her. "Don't worry about me doc" he said shrugging off her concerns "it's sort of my job to worry about you" she reminded him leaning back in her chair feeling defeated that she wasn't getting through to him. "Ya got anything else to talk about or are we done?" He asked sensing they were both annoyed at this topic

"Yes actually" Liz cleared her throat fixing her posture "entry 29" she simple said "ah fuck, I knew you'd bring that up" he sighed "yes I fucking love him, let everyone know Mickey Fuckin' milkovich has feelings, he's a fucking gay, sap"

With a small chuckle she responded "you know very well I won't go around telling people, but I am impressed that you have. Can you tell me how that made you feel?"

"Don't get all doctor-y  on me now!" He let a smile slip out "I'm not gonna lie down and spill my feelings." He told her

"You don't need to spill your feelings,I just thought you could enlighten me of how this one person has made such a huge change in you"

"I couldn't even tell you" Mickey glanced up to her "and for the first time this ain't me trying to avoid the conversation.. he's ... fuck I don't know he's real,  he cares, he's so much fucking better than I am.... he's damn good looking too" Mickey smiled

"You seem happy; although..." She hesitated "you also seems to be concerned that it's all too good to be true?" She questioned bringing up the final journal entry "don't read into everything Lizzy" he shrugged her off "again it is part of my job to actually read and read into everything"

"Just don't go looking for trouble, or looking to ruin what you have if nothing is happening" she urged before handing the book back "I don't look but trouble always finds me"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if it's kinda boring and mundane but I swear to you I have some good ideas and cameos for upcoming chapters 
> 
> But let's get back to Mickey's head:  
> What's gonna on in there  
> Does he need something to shake him up cause happy and content just doesn't make for good writing 
> 
> Comment away!!


	21. Chapter 21

Mandy was keeping her cool as a line of people started to form, "so what the fuck happened to you?" She asked the burly man sitting in front of her. "Bar fight" he said simply "yeah no shit I just thought there was a story or somethin'" she went back to cleaning up his head wound "normally hospital's don't give a shit" he told her "and do I look like a normal fucking hospital?" She barked. With a slight nod he explained "so how was I supposed to know she had a boyfriend, I'm just havin' a damn conversation and the fucking boyfriend clocks me in the head with the beer bottle"

"Yeah figured" she pulled a peice of green glass from his head "so I ain't a doctor or nothin' but don't drink anymore tonight, maybe don't sleep for a few hours don't look like a concussion tho." Mandy informed him "fuck that's all no damn lecture while ya fix me up?" He asked surprised by how easy it all was "nah I don't give a shit, as long as ya pay" she reminded holding our her hand which he gladly put a few hundred dollars in "fucking best cost, and better service " he assured her "one time I fucking went and for five fucking stitches has to pay almost three grand how fucking stupid is that" he cursed as he walked to the door passing by Mickey who just arrived "any trouble yet?" He asked "nope" she beamed

"So what do you want me to do?" He asked slouching against the wall "make sure all these people have things I can actual deal with... Pretty much go with if it's happened to you or Terry they can stay" she informed him walking away with the next person who hobbled off beside her

"So what the fuck is wrong with you" Mickey asked "fine you can stay" he decided upon hearing they probably had a sprained wrist

"and you" he nodded to the next

"damn what the hell happened to you?" He asked someone else, this went on for two more people till he got to someone who looked fine "what's your fucking story?" He asked "I'm here for the nurse" he stated "yeah and..." Mick insisted on more information "i-- uh-- to help me releave some pressure, ya know to look at something swollen..." He gave a wink

"What the fuck did you just say" Mickey's voice bellowed causing the whole room to go silent "fuck if she doesn't so blow jobs I'll just take a hand job it won't fuckin take long she's smokin hot" he chuckled, everyone now staring fearful for the idiot. Mickey grabbed a hand full of the guys jeans and dick "she's not a fucking hooker, and she's my baby fucking sister. So don't fucking come back here or I'll make sure you have a broken dick" he squeezed harder the man now squriming in pain "nod if you understand" Mick instructed to which he quickly nodding "yes fuckin yes, just let go" Mickey pushed him away with some force, and the guy scurried out the door. Two others slinked away.

Mandy took no time at all with the man with the limp telling him he'd need a tetanus shot and she couldn't help him, grumbling he left without any issue.

Next was a very attractive woman wearing a black mini that barely covered her ass her hair was tousled, makeup smeared "you ok?" Mandy asked "just another night" she sighed "but I got this gouge on my arm" Mandy nodded taking her to the seat to clean her up "how'd this happen?"   
"Did you ever hear the saying keep your pimp and strong?" She asked "it ain't just a sayin'"

"You hear people though you were here for sex?" She informed me while she stitched her up "me? yeah right! I mean I'm good but ..."   
"Hey it's not for everyone and I'm sure this isn't the brightest example but it's good money, I get a car, and I'm good at it" she shrugged "and it seems like a lot less work then all of this" glancing around "thanks but no thanks" Mandy smiled placing a bandage over her arm keep it covered keep it clean" the woman nodded and left

****

Across town Ian was meetings Rita, she was in charge, and she wanted to give him a job, his own ambulance. There was going to be a trail period of course where she'd come on runs with him show him the ropes, but she was so impressed with his scores she gave him the job upon their first meeting. "So that's about everything, any questions?" Ian shook his head "no I'd just love to get a uniform and start" he told her honestly "alright well we have a few spares in the back and obviously they won't have your name on them, but it'll make you feel like one of us" Ian took no time to change excited for the opportunity, ready to start this career. It wasn't long sitting around the break room getting to know everyone when a voice came across the scanner "category C 560"

Ian who had just read the manual knew that it meant some kind of assult. He quickly ran to the ambulance jumping into the passenger side. Rita has gotten the address; Ian knew it to be a gay bar.

It felt like forever for them to get there. He rushed out of the ambulance the moment he felt them come to a stop. Police had already shown up and broken up whatever happened. There was a small man hands cuffed behind his back, face bludgeoned Ian want to him first "are you alright?" He asked kneeling down placing his med kit on the ground."yeah I'm fine" he didnt make eye contact with Ian "can I have a look" he asked placing blue latex gloves on and hesitantly reaching for his chin, turning to see the damage "what happened" he asked grabbing supplies from his kit "fucking jocks can't handle this much of a man" he commented gyrating "so they attacked you, but you're the one in hand cuffs?" Ian was furious "excuse me, officer I need the hand cuffs off to bandage his wounds"

The officer wanted to object, make a scene but there were too many people watching now, so grumbling he uncuffed the man. "He's your responsibility" he grunted walking away

"My hands are fine" the young man stated " I know" Ian smiled and gave a wink. "I'm Ian by the way" he mentioned casually as he put gauze on his eyebrow "Trevor, nice to meet you" he smiled gazing into the paramedics eyes.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Canadian Thanksgiving (or as we like to call it real Thanksgiving!) 
> 
> Not a whole lot of Mickey in this chapter, sorry, but we do have that trouble Mickey knew was coming and his name is Trevor! 
> 
> I'm hoping Mandy's new endeavor doesn't get in the way of what this story is about and that's Mickey and what's going on in his head! 
> 
> Lots of love so leave lots of comments


	22. Chapter 22

Everyone piled into the Milkovich house as the sun was starting to rise. The first two were Mickey and Mandy "why the fuck did you have to do this job in the night" he moaned rubbing his face "you want to complain or do you want your cut?" She asked handing him five hundred dollars "and what kind of cut is this" he asked knowing she made more than a grand "you're the muscles, not the surgeon" Mandy tossed her coat on the chair and flopped "you ain't no surgeon either" he reminded her "yeah well fuck off I did more work so I get more money you, so take it or leave it!"  
"A'right calm your shit" he took her money "when you think ians getting home?" Mickey asked looking at the time "aw you worried?" She teased

Ignoring her he wrote in his book

 _Entry 31_  
_Am I really that pathetic, waiting to see if he comes home_  
_Did I just say home, fuck. I mean he's here all the time ..._  
_maybe I should ask if he fucking wants to move in,_

It was only another ten minutes before Ian was walking in the door. "You two are still up?" He looked surprised "I just got home but yeah Mickey waited up for you" she teased

"You waited up for me?" Ian smiled drapping his arm around Mick. "Fuck you two" he growled "but yeah I wanted to see how you were doing"

"Oh Mickey it was amazing the rush of hearing the call getting there and actually helping people." He smiled

" So you have blood, guts, broken bones?" Mickey asked genuinely interested in Ian's day at work. Day at work how average did they sound now! "Yeah a bit, had one hobo fight, one heart attack, and one gay kid who got in a fight with some jocks" Ian listed his night "I mean it was mostly standard things but helping that kid was the highlight of my night, he'd been handcuffed even though he was the one hurt and I  acted all athoritative and told the cop to let him loose and they fucking listened! It was a rush Mick!"

Mickey smiled knowing Ian was doing something he loved "what about you two?" Ian asked "people thought Mandy was a whore" Mick smirked, it was funny for Mickey to say it but he honestly would have killed anyone who would have touched her "it's true, even had a hooker ask me if I wanted to be one... apparently I'm in the wrong profession" she gave aside smile.

"So, why'd you come here after work?" Mickey asked knowing he was setting the ground work to ask Ian to move in, but his question was harsh and to the point it got Ian on the defensive "what the fuck, thought you'd wanna see me"

"What the fuck you on about of course I wanna see you" Mickey answered his voice going louder than he would have wanted "then I don't get it why are you asking me why I'm here if you want me here?" Ian now confused "I fucking wanted to ask you to move in" he grumbled "but ya got all whiny..."

"So you taking it back to don't want me to move in? Just because you don't know how to start a fucking conversation?" Ian huffed

Mickey looked hurt, no Mickey was hurt he knew what he wanted to say, and yeah he fucking said it wrong but he didn't mean for a fight to happen "god damnit" he muttered barely audible "what are we even fighting about?" He asked "I want you to move in, you want to move in so it sounds like we're fighting but agreeing?" Ian took a deep breathe "ah, yeah.. I guess so" he felt fusterated, but the idea of living with Mickey (and Mandy) seemed really exciting "ya guess so what about the fight or moving in?" Mickey really wanted an answer "to both" Ian let a smirk run across his face.

"Well fuck I guess I gotta go buy some ear plugs you two will be fucking all the damn time" Mandy piped up from the other room obviously eavesdropping on their conversation. "Guess so, but what the fuck are you gonna do about it right now" Mickey gave a wicked grin.

So it wasn't a grand gesture, there wasn't fireworks or even the right mood set. But Mick asked and Ian said yes and he was damn sure to celebrate that.  "Goodnight Mands" he teased guiding Ian to their room.

The door was barely closed behind them and Mickey was pushing Ian's back against it. He'd screwed up how he wanted to ask him to move in,  he was going to make damn sure his words were clear and followed this time.

"I Fuckin' want you" his breath airy against Ian's lips. They kiss but it's quickly broken by Ian's burning questions "so now that I live here do I need to pay rent?" He asked "not what I fucking want to talk about right now Gallagher" Mick hissed trying to get their lips to connect pushing Mick off him slightly Ian asked "yeah but I need to know, if I do pay to live here and we keep doing this does that just make me a hooker"

"Details.." Mickey groaned rolling his eyes "so you'll be my whore that's kinda fucking hot"

"You like that sir?" Ian asked in a sexy tone "don't fucking call me sir" Mickey growled "sorry Daddy" Ian's green sad puppy dog eyes gazed at him. Based on the twitch Mickey felt in his pants that surprisingly turned him on. He looped his thumbs in Ian's pants pressing him closer, so he could feel how turned on he was  dragging him forward, up, down,  grind them together slowly.

Their hands ran along each others’ bodies, ripping their clothes off. mick ran his fingertips pressing lightly against Ian's collarbone and the lines of his muscles, fuck he was beautiful. He kissed Ian's neck running his tounge along the collarbone.

"I think it's time for you to fuck _daddy_ in the ass" god the word, the sentence almost made him lose his hard on. He was not one for dirty talk, role play and especially calling himself daddy; coming out of his mouth it just sounded wrong. He shook his head hoping it didn't make Ian as uncomfortable as it made him.

It took no time for him to be on his knees, naked and waiting; Ian didn't seem phased by Mickey's words. Mick couldn't see Ian but he could hear him unzipping his pants, pushing his boxers off hearing Ian's cock bob out. He moaned. Next he heard the sound of the lube bottle opening the sound of it squirting onto Ian's hands. The cool touch of Ian's fingers running between his ass cheeks

Ian had now spent a good while fingering and loosening Mick up "fuck" Mick cursed as Ian's fingers flung quickly out of his ass. Teasing him he began to rub his cock on his ass. "Just fucking do it Gallagher" mickey gritted his teeth "yes Daddy" Ian responded slowly inserting himself.

Mickey rocked his hips and groaned at the sound of skin slapping together "fuck, yes"  
"You want me to go faster Daddy?" Mickey moaned both hating and loving himself for liking this. Ian took the moan to be a yes because he seemed to be balls deep in him hitting his prostate with every thrust. Ian rolled his hips, drawing another moan from Mickey “Is this how you want it, daddy? Nice and deep?”  
"Yes, oh, fuckin God yes" Mickey roared

Mickey tried to find some balance, needing to touch himself, needing to finish. Seeing him do so Ian's hush voice said "shhh, no daddy I got you" leaning forward, God leaning forward pushed him further in. Finding the rhythm between pumping and thrusting, there's was a shutter from Ian's hip as he filled Mick's hole. With another fee quickened pumps mickey also finished. The two stayed there for a moment, panting, Ian leaned on Mickey's back giving soft kisses the salty taste of their sweat on his lips.

"Holy Fuck" Mickey let out a sigh collapsing on the bed " you're a fucking kinky kid Gallagher"  
" You're one to talk Milkovich..  or was it da--"

"Don't don't fucking say it, it's fucking weird"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is like a bonus chapter cause I was just going to jump into a chapter tormenting you all with Trevor but with such an uproar and demanding of sex, you get this chapter 
> 
> So I haaaate daddy kink, so I thought I'd be fun if Mickey hated the idea of it too, but also kinda liked it. 
> 
> As always comment pleeeaaasse!!


	23. Chapter 23

"hey Rita" Ian beamed coming into the station. "Thought I'd come by early see of you needed any help cleaning up" he stated. He knew both of them kept the ambulance in immaculate condition but there was something about being there, leaving home to come to work, the anticipation of going home. He just liked thinking about home.

"Ian, glad you're here, you have an admire I was about to send him away but since your here--" she smiled guiding him to the lounge.

"Trevor?" Ian looked surprised to see the small brunette. "Yeah" he gave a smile "sorry if this is weird" he started "but I needed to say Thanks"  
"You don't need to say thanks, it's my job" Ian smiled "then I guess I also didn't need to get you something" he said sheepishly bringing his hand from behind his back "sorry it's nothing special, I had thought of getting you scotch or a cigar... But I know nothing about those things and they seem very '50s dapper man and I didn't want to assume that of you" he started to ramble "then my friend Jamie thought I should bake you something which I reminded them I can't bake" he chuckled "and chocolate or a stuffed bear or balloons all seemed to gay" he finally passed him a plant

"Ah--thanks" Ian looked slightly confused but polietly smiled "it's a plant" there was a tag on it _'thanks for your thyme'_ "its an herb actually" he corrected "right thyme, it's clever" Ian nodded "it's stupid you hate it, it's fine I'll go" Trevor mumbled "don't be so hard on yourself" Ian tried to be nice "listen I gotta get to work but I'm glad you're ok, and thanks again"he gestured to the plant "you're welcome" he turned to leave "hey, you have plans after work?" He asked "I work until after midnight" he reminded him "then I'll probably just got home and crash with my boyfriend" he states simply "oh, yeah, of course" Trevor stammered "I'm a fuckin idiot to think someone as hot as you would still be available"

"Don't worry about it man" Ian smiled trying to be nice to the kid it's fucking hard to get rejected, but being nice apprently means try harder for some people "and this is a happy relationship?" He asked adding a small laugh to lighten the question . Ian's eyebrows furried "yes" he said a bit more stern "and no room for another?" Trevor asked "another fucking what?"  
"Another person" Trev was now the one to look confused "you're gay I thought you'd just know what I meant.."  
"Im gay not a brothel" Ian snipped "fuck no man, I was simply inquiring if you were in a monogamous relationship or if this was a poly or open relationship" he hoped that cleared things up. "  
"That just sounds like fancy fucking words for cheating" Ian was now obviously upset, placing the plant down and crossing his arms; it wasn't till he did that, that you could tell how muscular he was "listen it isn't for everyone I know that, just some relationships aren't full  with just one person  and I thought..." He paused he'd already upset the person he was attracted to, he definitely didn't want him to beat the shit out of him. "I thought I felt something last night when you were helping me, you got the cops to let me go, you winked you didn't feel the heat between us?" He asked honestly looking surprised "No!" Ian said louder than he meant "you felt something and that would have been fine but to push that on me, on my relationship."  Ian was furious "I need you to leave now" Trevor nodded fearing if he didn't Ian might hurt him, truning slowly he walked away like a wounded puppy

Ian pulled out his phone to text Mick

 _Fuck people, remind me again why I wanted a job_ [message sent 6:03]

 _Did someone fucking hurt you? I'll fuckin kill 'em_ [message received 6:03]

 _No nevermind it's fine_ [message sent 6:04]  
Ian realized now that telling Mickey probably isn't the best idea, like his text said he'd probably kill the poor gay boy.

 _Ian._ [Message received 6:05]  
_Fuck_ [message received 6:05]  
_It ain't nothing_ [message received 6:05]

 _Mickey!_ [Message sent 6:06]  
_It was seriously nothing_ [ message sent 6:06]  
Fuck if he told Mickey over text he knew he'd spiral before he got home but saying nothing felt like keeping something from him. Sighing Ian  picked his phone up again  
' _Member that kid I told you about last night_  
_He came to the station to say thanks and..._  
_And he hit on me, and was just really persistent..._  
_Just said shit that bothered me_ [message sent 6:08]

There was a long pause as he waited for Mickey to answer looking at those three little dots bounce around was killing him. What was Mickey thinking what would he say or worse what would he do...

 _Ok_ [message received 6:10]

That was it ok...  
Ian waited to see if more dots would appear but after another three minutes of nothing he decided to text back  
_K, well I gotta go back to work_ [message sent 6:13]  
_I love you, I'll be home around 1 if you ain't out with Mandy_ [message sent 6:13]

 _Love you too, Gallagher_ [message received 6:14]

***  
Mickey tossed the phone on the coffee table and collapsed into the old run down sofa "we should really get a new couch and throw this old Chesterfield into the basement." Mandy commented watching her brother sink into the sofa "yeah whatever" he mumbled not listening to her. Staring at his phone wishing there was something could do. "Mick" she said louder obviously by the look on her face she'd been trying to get his attention for a few moments now "what" he spat "what the fuck is with you?" She asked "Ian" he sighed "someone is hittin' on him or somethin'"

"Yeah and?' Mandy was waiting for more, for what could have him so upset "that's it" he finally made eye contact with his sister "fuck off" Mandy rolled her eyes "have you seen your boyfriend. I'm shocked he can leave the house, he's fucking gorgeous, you expect people not to hit on him? It's not public fucking knowledge that's he's Mickey Fuckin' Milkovich's boyfriend" she reminded him

He huffed not wanting to have this discussion with his sister. Mostly he wanted to grab the fucking horny gay boy by the throat. Or better yet show him how much Ian Gallagher was not available.

 _Why the fuck did you tell Mickey_ [message sent]  
_Fuck, what's he doing Mandy?_ [Message received]  
_Obsessing mostly_ [message sent]  
_Fuck, sorry, least I didn't tell him the part about the guy wanting to be part of our relationship_ [message received]  
"Fuckin' shit balls" Mandy gasped not meaning to make an outward nosie her brother would hear  
"What's with you?" He asked "nothing, nevermind, go back to sulking"  
_Don't! nothing about Mickey says he'll share_ [message sent]  
_God no Mandy I'm not even interested_ [message received]

 _Entry 32_  
_Why the fuck should I care that someone hit on him_  
_Mandy's right he's hot, people notice_  
_But the I feel like I'm gonna hurl, or hurt someone_

_***_

"Ian we got a call, let's go" Rita yelled. hearing her he shoved phone into his pocket and ran to meet Rita who informed him as they got ready they had a motorcycle accident.

When they got there it was just the bike tipped over on the road and it's driver at least six feet away. Luckily they were wearing a riding jacket, jeans and a helmet so that would definitely help with the road rash. "Hey, hello can you hear me?" Ian rushed over. Checking for any fallen electrical wires, or other dangers Ian approached "my name's is I'm here to help" still no movement "I'm just checking for any blood, checking spinal..." Ian went through all his training loudly, mostly for his own sake but also for the victim "I'm going to take off your helmet" he informed them after deciding there was no neck injury.

Slowly releasing the man's head from his helmet "fuck" Ian cursed loudly "what is it?" Rita's worries voice yelled from across the street where she was with the person from the car "nothing" he yelled back "he's unresponsive" he informed her "then get the oxygen out of your bag you know your shit Ian, don't panic"

It took Ian a minute looking at the brunette man, with thick eyebrows and small stubble on his chin.

Trevor.

He sighed he knew he had a job to do. He looked around "fuck" rookie mistake he forgot his kit in the ambulance when he ran out "Rita I need my bag" he yelled "I'mma start mouth to mouth"  He placed his ear on his chest 1,2,3,4,5... Pinching his nose and wrapping his mouth around Trevor's  
Breath.  
Breath.  
"Here" Rita was there faster than Ian expected "sorry" he gazed up at her "don't let it happen again, now help him!" She ordered  
Ian applied the oxygen mask and after a moment Trevor coughed back into life.  
"Ian?" He looked puzzled  
"If you're stalking me I think there's better ways then nearly getting yourself killed"  
Trevor coughed out a laugh.he licked his lips "did you kiss me?" He asked "mouth to mouth" Ian corrected "huh our first make out session and I missed it" he grinned 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Trevor to piss you off... Is it weird that writing him made me hate him more lol 
> 
> So does Mickey come face to face with Trevor  
> Should the whole story line just fizzle out so there's no more stress 
> 
> Comments, convos any acknowledgement that there's life reading this is always nice!
> 
> Ps I added Chesterfield for J_Qs request and it's sounds absurd like I said it would! But us Canadians like to please everyone so there it is


	24. Chapter 24

"Mandy" Mick waved his sister over "you good if I leave early?" He asked standing near a door that only had one other person waiting to see her "I wanted to stay open for another two hours" she whined "yeah well fucking look around it's a slow night, plus Ian gets home any minute I gotta fuckin talk to him" he played the Ian card knowing she wouldn't be able to say no "fine go, I'll finish with the people here and I'll be right behind you" she agreed.

It was pretty much as Mickey heard her say fine that he was rushing off to his car to get home.  
"Yeah love ya bye or whatever" Mandy said to what would have been a puff cloud if she was in a cartoon with how fast Mickey left

Mandy looked at her remaining patients in record time and was shutting everything down getting ready to lock up like she promised her brother, when there was a bang on the door "sorry closed!" She yelled through the door "please" the person in the other side begged "I'm promise I'm not a crazy murdering psychopath" he claimed "right because all crazy murdering psychopaths say they are before killing someone" she held her body agisnt the door. "Fair point" they sighed.

Mandy held her ear to the door, after a minute of not hearing anything she opened the door; sitting on the floor was the man. "You ok?" She asked cautiously "yeah" he mumbled "think my shoulder just needs to be popped back into place" he informed her as he winced in pain standing up. "Came here thought you'd help...guess I was wrong" he sneered "fuck you I do this to be a nice damn person, but I'm going how, I'm by myself ..." she shrieked "that's fuckin highly unlikely" he rolled his eyes "excuse me" crossing her arms ready to be on the defensive "if you were a nice person you wouldn't make them pay,or when some poor helpless person knocks on the door you fucking help them" he spatted

She grabbed him by the arm "fuck" he yelped "I'm a milkovich I'm sure you're heard of us so don't start a fight with me!" She barked hoping he didn't actually want to fight her cause she'd crumble. He nodded through the pain. "Good" she smiled pleased with herself and pulled on his shoulder for it to lock back in place "hey" he moved his arm with more mobility "thanks"   
"You're welcome, not that you deserved it, but I'm a nice person and all" she smirked, now having a chance to look at the person who's been nagging her. He had Sandy brown hair, the most unusual, but sexy eyes she'd ever seen "so what happened?" She asked to stop herself from just staring "girlfriend" he grunted. Mandy felt like a balloon losing all it's air of course he had a girlfriend "well I suppose ex girlfriend don't think I'll be going back" he scratched the back of his head

"You wanna grab a beer?" She asked "it's my medical opinion that booze will help you fell less of the pain in your arm" Mandy turned locking the door "so you said you're a milkovich?" He leaned against the building waiting for her "that means your Mickey's little sister" he continued "you Fuckin' know Mick?" She asked turning around "nah but my brother's fucking him" he informed her "names lip" he smiled a beauty, make you fuck em right there smile "and what about the heartache?" He dramatically held his chest "well you know what they say about getting over someone...."

***

Mickey got stuck on his way home, traffic backed up because of an accident. Slowly the traffic moved forward he tapped on the steeling wheel impatiently.  But it was then he saw the flashing lights of the ambulance that he realized it was probably Ian working. He arched his head trying to see. He waited painfully in the line of cars until he saw a spot to pull over.

He rushed over as close as he could get "Ian" he yelled over seeing a flash of red "Mickey?" Ian responded confused "what are you doing here?" He asked "on the way home, you gonna be long?" "Nah just finished." Ian smile happy to see his boyfriend until that sinking feeling hit his stomach, Trevor was around and he seemed like the type to screw with people. "So you must be the boyfriend" came Trevor's arrogant voice from around the ambulance. "Fuck are you?" Mickey nudged his head up "ah Ian I'm hurt you haven't mentioned me?" He slung his arm around Ian "get off" Ian shifted off of him "actually I was hoping to do that to you" he winked.

Mickey's blood boiled he took a hard step forward but Ian placed his hands on Mickey's chest "he's trying to piss you off don't let em" Ian whispered   
"Why the fuck is he here?" Mickey finally took his eyes off Trevor to look at Ian for an honest answer " he's the accident, and He--" Ian broke his sentence to shot a look at Trevor "should be in the ambulance" he looked back to Mickey "go home I'm home soon as I'm done with this call" he leaned in grabbing Mickey's by the back of his neck pulling him in to a rough passionate kiss he pulled away resting their foreheads together "I love you, you hear me" Mick nodded

"Yeah yeah kiss 'em love 'em but I'm the one riding into the sunset with you" Trevor teased.

"It's fucking midnight idiot" Mick yelled. Trevor waved and blew a kiss just to tip Mickey over the edge "fuck" the curse seemed to echo as Mickey stormed off to his car watching his boyfriend walk away with another guy.

Mickey slammed the door, lit a cigarette and inhaled, after a long drag he finally exhaled. He took out his little black book

 _Entry 33_  
_Fucking book is suppose to help with my feelings_  
_Well what the fuck do you do when all your feelings tell you to fucking ~~kill~~ seriously hurt someone? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for you lovely readers.   
> I did mention I had cameos right?! Well here's lip I don't know how much he and mandy will take up of this story as the title implies it is about Mickey Fuckin'Milkovich's feelings so I'll try; emphasis on the try. Keep it Mickey focused 
> 
> I think bad things would happen if Mickey actually killed Trevor but don't we all want that?


	25. Chapter 25

"Mickey..." Her voice seemed serious "can you please explain what's been happening with you since I last saw you?"the doctor asked her notepad out ready to jot down any notes. Mick shrugged "I dunno Ian moved in..."

"Mickey do you know that's the first time you've called him by name in our sessions?" She beamed writing down his name "you're opening up, this is becoming real for you. Up until now you've distanced him from all this by not attaching a name..."

"Yeah ok whatever you say doc." He rolled his eyes he didn't think he was purposefully keeping Ian from her, but maybe he was keeping their little life a bubble away fr prying eyes.

"So you asked Ian to move in?" She asked he nodded "yeah that just happened"

"And now you're becoming possessive... We talked about this Mickey..." She started in on him "no it ain't like that" he changed his posture sitting up straighter "so he started working and there's this kid who like what's him or something and he's Fuckin' trying to piss me off, he's trying to take what's mine" he roared. Liz cleared her throat "frist off Ian is a person not property, second do you think Ian is going to leave?" She asked Mickey actually thought long and hard before he answered "no, nah I don't think so" he knew he loves Ian, he knew Ian loved home, but if he wanted more, wanted someone with a good life would Ian go? Could Mickey blame him?

"Then don't fight this person it's only going to hurt you, entries like this one where you suggest killing somone--" "hey I scratched that!" He jumped in "yet I can still see you wrote it which means a judge can see it which means you will continue to come see me or worse they will fear you are too violent for the streets..." She took a breath "And that will not help Ian if you're behind bars" she hesitantly added.

Her words caused Mickey to slump back in the chair. She was right; not that he wanted to admit that. He couldn't risk losing Ian and he couldn't ask him to wait. "Fine" he finally huffed "I won't kill anyone, but what do you suggest I do? With all this uh anger?" He shrugged. He had never asked for her opinion before, was therapy actually working? "Well, many people try working out or yoga to deal with stress..." She paused when she realizes Mickey wouldn't hesr anything else she was saying over his own laughter "come on Lizzy, I ain't doing yoga we both know that" She let out a small chuckle "some of the world's greatest painters were suffering through pain you could use your anger to fuel your creativity." She suggested "or any artist really, sculpture, musician, photographer" she listed occupations "and if the arts are not for you   
We can start exploring options that will work for you as our sessions continue."

"Yeah alright" Mickey shifted in the chairman uncomfortably all these options seemed so... So not Mickey Milkovich.

***

Ian sat on the couch with Mandy "so you met Lip?" He asked "yeah, why haven't you introduced us before?" She asked stretching her legs over him, wiggling her toes to encourage him to hold her feet "he had a girlfriend" Ian reminded "yeah but you think I'm better than any girlfriend he had right?" Ian sighed "Right" he gave a small smile "but the thing with Lip is, sometimes his smarts come across as arrogance, and because he's smart he wants more than this life" he explained "I don't Fuckin' understand you saying he wouldn't want to be with be cause I ain't smart enough or food enough for him?" She barked "we're good enough for you, you got a 'more than this life' kinda job. whatever that means"

"Mandy clam down I'm not attacking you. Those are your words not mine. Lip is amazing he's my brother I love em, I just don't want you to get hurt with his ideas of grandeur, I wouldn't want you to get left behind, or have anything become weird with us" he squeezed her foot showing her affection. "Don't worry Red, pretty sure I love you more than my own brother" she joked, he thinks.

"What are you two doing?" Mickey asked coming home to the sounds of them talking and laughing. It might be one of the best experiences he's ever had walking in to this house hearing laughter and happiness, not something that happened on Terry's rein. "Mandy wants to do my brother" Ian did casually "the one you said was bad news for her? Good job keeping them apart" he huffed kicking off his shoes, and collapsing in a near by chair. Mandy ignored his snarky comment "what'd your shrink say?" She asked "pfft" air flowed out of his lips but no actual words "believe she suggested yoga" Mick rolled his eyes "what I thought you like downward facing dog" Mandy smirked looking between them "fuck you"

"Mick, can we talk about the other night?" He asked sitting up on tossing Mandy's legs off his. "That's sounds stressful so namasay no" Mickey smirked but he honestly didn't want to talk about it, talking about it was going to make him angry, if he got angry he was gonna have to hurt someone and as the doc pointed out, that wouldn't be a good thing for his life.

"Mickey!" Ian insisted.

Meanwhile Mandy curled herself up in her corner of the sofa hoping they wouldn't see her so she could listen.

"It was a God damn fluke, or A twisted way for Trevor to see me" Ian sighed "I never have to see him again, I don't want to ever have to see him again"

"don't fucking say his name I didn't need to know that" Mickey groaned "what's his deal?" Mickey asked not making eye contact with anyone "I don't know." Ian said honestly "He was pushy, he was obsessive, and it was all in his own head!" Ian kept staring at Mickey hoping he's look up. "So you don't like him?" He questioned starring at his feet "Mickey why would you fuckin think that, I love you, I moved in with you" he was emphasizing all of the yous. "Idont know I've never fucking been in love before and fuck I got trust issues, and maybe you were looking for someone not so fucked up"

"Aww look at Mickey using his therapy talk, and feelings" she gushed "stop lurking, and fuck off" he barked at his sister. But she knew his bark was worse than his bite especially when it came to her so she simply flipped her off and stayed put. "Mickey, you can fuck right off" Ian visibly upset. "I can believe you got trust issues, and that you've never been in love. But fuck you for thinking I'd leave. You should fucking know by now I love you, what you're doing thinking I could be a cheater or looking for something better" Ian started to have tears fill ."you're sabotaging this relationship"

"Fuck, I'm sorry Ian" he glanced up at his boyfriend "I'm an idiot" he added sighing heavily Ian sat there not saying anything letting the silence build which made Mickey very uncomfortable. "Yeah but you're my idiot" he finally smiled "yeah.." Mick gave a small attempt of a smile "yeah, I'm not gonna let a little fight scare me off, but you'll have to make it up to me" he winked

Mandy groaned "again you two are worse than bunnies"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So was that the last of Trevor??? 
> 
> And you know it means the next chapter is sexy time!! 
> 
> Are we still liking this fic? Is it fading? I feel like Mick is growing but where does it end?!! 
> 
> Comments suggestions worries complaints I just like knowing people are reading!!


	26. Chapter 26

Love you, im fucking sorry,”mickey whispered "God I want you"

"Mmm you always want me" the red head was coy wrapping his arms around Mickey's neck pressing their lips together. "How about we try out that yoga" Ian suggested with a smirk "yeah fuckin rights I ain't doing that" Mickey responded "oh sorry you thought I was asking oh no you owe me for how you acted, for how you thought I would act. So now I want yoga pose sex"

"You're telling what to do?" Mick arched an eyebrow "damn right I am Milkovich, now on your feet and hands I want to see you ass in the air." The oxymoron of Ian sounding like a drill Sargent while suggesting yoga poses would have made Mickey laugh if he wasn't so turned on. Mickey does as he's told; after removing his clothes.

He inhaled hard, it was choppy and caused a slight pain in his chest "fuck I'm outta shape Gallagher" he wheezed "all the more reason for this little yoga session" he traced his fingers along Mickey's back. It was killing Mickey not knowing what Ian was planning, fingering, licking, hand job...

Mickey closed his eyes he could feel the blood rushing to his head "what are you fucking doing?" He asked "oh no you didn't think this was going to be easy did you?" The tone in his voice gave Mickey the chills "you Wait there" Mickey heard the door close. He felt like had to wait forever for Ian to come back; when in reality it was probably less than three minutes. "Where the hell did you go" Mick asked sounding very done with this waiting game "hydration" he could hear the smirk in Ian's tone. The sound of ian sucking on an ice cube was getting him hard. "Can I get up yet?" He almost begged "no I'm almost ready don't ruin my fun!"

Ian slid down onto the floor his head between Mickey's legs,  looking up at Mickey's large and very excited cock. Before Ian's mouth is even around him he can feel the coldness. Teasing he flicks his cool tongue all around. Finally Ian took Mickey's cock into his mouth; the coldness, oh sweet baby Jesus the coldness of the ice mixed with the heat of his dick, it was a feeling he had never felt before, it was--fucking amazing. He also never experienced a blow job from this angle before "God that's fuckin cold" Mickey moaned not completely in a complaining tone Ian hummed causing Mick to twitch. He'd complain about the twinge in his neck if he wasn't enjoying watching Ian arch his neck up to blow him.

It's only been minutes minutes,and he’s teetering on the edge. Ian could taste precum and the melted ice against his tongue causing him to hum in excitement. Quickly sliding back out from under Mickey he stood up faced with Mickey perfectly plump round ass. Ian held Mickey's hips as he aligned his cock to his hole. After a moment of gentle pushing Ian slips in they both groan. They fall into their rhythm,Mickey rolling his hips to meet him thrust for thrust. Mick wants this to last forever but he's already so close

Mickey clenched as his body shook; he's finished much faster than he wanted. The sensation of his ass clenching around Ian's cock had him finishing soon after and slowing pulled out. Mickey collapsed on the floor "fuck Gallagher" he huffed

***  
After a quick shower Mickey was staring at his book "you gonna write about what happened?" Ian joked "nah I don't wrote that shit in here, god Mandy would probably fucking read it" he gave a small side smile. "So what's up you've been staring at it for at least five minutes now." Ian pointed out "yeah I know" he grunted "it's just... There's nothing really special in here, nothing you don't already know, but I feel...Fuck look at me talking about fucking feelings like a damn fairy" he gave a heavy sigh "I thought, maybe I should, I dunno if you wanted, you could read it" he stammered out a sentence. Ian's eyes widened, he never looked at the book let alone make any kind of suggestion that he wanted to read it; he did though. "Why? Why now?" Ian asked causiously "cause I fucked up, and I wanna show you I fucking trust you." He passed the book over "read it or don't, ask questions if ya want but there it is all of Mickey fucking milkovich's feelings... I'mma grab a beer" Mickey got up he couldn't just sit there and watch Ian read his words.

Mick sat out on the ratty back porch where he often found himself when he was stressed or needed to be away from people. He took a drag of his cigarette hollowing his cheeks some while savoring the addiction.The ashes falling to the balcony railing, the smoke flowing from the tip. He's stress smoking because it's already almost gone. He finally removes it from his lips to have a drink of beer. Was Ian taking forever to read or was he really just that nervous that time has stood still.

Inside Ian was sitting alone reading ever word carefully. the first few entries had made him smile he never realized how much he had gotten under Mickey's skin by just hanging out with Mandy. His smile faded by entry 12 and 13 where Mickey hates hi.awlf or thinks he has to say he isn't gay. Ian sighs and continues reading letting out an actually gasp seeing that Mickey had serious feelings for him earlier than Mick had admitted, maybe even earlier than Ian had.

Fuck maybe he had made a big deal about Mickey having a real job it's mentioned a lot in the journal. That made him feel like shit

Ian made it to the last of the entries smiling at Mickey's entry of how their I love yous went from his point of view then nest in tears for how the whole Trevor thing had really effected him. "Fuck" Ian muttered getting through the whole thing

 _Entry 34_  
_Summited by Ian Gallagher_

 _Mickey Milkovich_  
_Is amazing just the way he is_  
_Loyal,_  
_Loving_  
_Caring_  
_And funny_  
_He does anything for his family and those he loves_  
_Just because it comes across as anger issues doesn't mean he lacks empathy_  
_Mickey Milkovich is the best man I know_

Ian closed the book and went outside where he knew he'd find Mickey. He said nothing, he stepped over to him and kissed him "I love you, I'm sorry I drive you crazy"

"I wouldn't wanna go crazy with anyone else" Mickey replied pulling him closer for another kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't think Ian will be giving Mickey the cold shoulder anymore 
> 
> Oh yes I went there!! 
> 
> I think I've come up with my ending but we can add more till then so comment away!!


	27. Chapter 27

Mandy came out of her room surprised not to see anyone in the house. After a moment of listen in she realized they were on the back deck. She was about to join them when the elusive black book was sitting on the coffee table unattended. Mickey had only let her read it the once and even that it got taken away before she was done, she looked around before sinking into the couch to read. Refreshing herself she re read the first few entries. "Fuck this is a god damn page turner" she mumbled to herself

She hadn't realized how much she was clenching the book, not wanting it to end and definitely not to be taken away again, but to her surprise she made it to the end "damn it Mick..."

She looked around again, seeing no one she grabbed the pen

 _Entry 35_  
_Summited by Mandy Milkovich_

 _If it wasn't for Mickey Milkovich, I'd be dead._  
_Where you see anger, I see scared_  
_Where you see violence, I see my protector_  
_Where you see outbursts, I see defenses_  
_What you don't see, I've seen it all._  
_He saved me from our father_  
_He saved me from having to live on a street corner_  
_He gave me second chances_  
_He deserves a second chance._

The screen door slammed shut, Mandy jolted up "you're doing something you're not suppose to" he brothers voice boomed "every since we were kids Mandy jumps when she doesn't wanna get caught" he informed Ian as they made their way around the couch "my fuckin book" he growled "what!" Mandy's voice was shrill "you let Ian write in it!"

Mickey shifted his gaze to Ian "I did what?" Mick waited for Ian to respond "well.." Ian swallowed hard "after I read it I just figured I should add something " he shugged "and what about you?" He asked at his sister "hey I was good too!" She defended herself "I didn't even draw the heart and dick border I was thinking about!" She said as if it was something to be proud of

"Just fuckin give me the book" he growled. Mandy glided her way to Ian as Mick too a few steps away from them thumbing back the few pages   
He sniffed, nodded, cleared his throat and turned around "ok, Thanks"

"Can we change the damn subject now?" He asked; more like begged.

"Well i guess we should all get ready for work or something" Mandy shrugged "yeah fine, I'm ready so whenever you're ready mands we can go" she walked over to her brother "five minutes, I promise" she kissed him on the cheek and ran off to get dressed. "So best man you know?" Mickey asked stepping closer to Ian "you really are" he smiled. Mick leaned in and kissed him "the bars not really set that high though" he joked 

***

They want they're separate ways; Ian went to work promising that if Trevor showed up at work he'd notify Rita of the situation. Mandy and Mickey went off to her little hospital.

When they got there Mickey saw someone was already waiting, which already put him on the defense, becoming his sister's body guard as they aprouched "hey Mandy" they called out "you got regulars already" Mick asked his sister "I guess..." She sounded hesitint until she saw his face "you hurt again?" She enquired as she bounced over to Lip. "Me? Oh no I just figured you might like some company, and I've patched up Frank enough times if you needed any help" he smiled sweetly at her "aww, thanks"

 _Fuck_ Mickey thought he knew the tone in her voice, the look in her eye, she fucking liked him. Mind you Mandy always thought she likes them, it might be for a week or an hour, but she always likes them.

"Fine you too go play doctor, I'm gonna sit here" he informed them pulling up the chair best the door. And it wasn't till after Mandy gave him a look that he realized he just told them to go play doctor could come across as something else. He ignored the snickering that was now happening

_Entry 36_

_Looks like Mandy's got a new partner_  
_Guess that means I should figure out something for me_  
_Fuck_  
_I've never done things for me_  
_I've stolen for Terry_  
_Or for food for me and Mandy_  
_I've hurt people to protect us_  
_Work had only ever been to survive_  
_So now what?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick update for all of you  
> Mickey's at a crossroads   
> What will happen next??!!


	28. Chapter 28

God, was he actually starting to enjoy coming to therapy, not that he's be saying that out loud or even write it down. But there was something about doctor Liz that he was starting to look forward to.

"So, ah..." He wasn't sure how to tell her "both Ian and Mandy got a hold of the book" he held onto it not sure if he was ready for her to see "alright" Liz began a bit hesitint trying to read him and how he felt about it "did they read something you were unsure about? Did it break your trust or ..." She was cut off by Mickey's surprising truth that he had given it to Ian to read willingly "that is a wonderful step" the doc smiled "and well Mandy she's just nosey" he gave a half smirk still not mad that she read his journal.

"So you aren't mad at them, again I'm very impressed with how you're handling this" she wrote down a few notes "the thing is..." Mick took a deep breath "they wrote in it, and I don't know if that was ok, or if there was some kinda stuodi rule or something I dunno I just didn't want you to be mad..." He grunted

"Wrote in it?" She repeated "may I see the book?" She asked reaching for it "yeah" Mick shrugged. He leaned back hating watching her read in silence, sounds like his own breathing started to bother him the longer it took her to say anything.

"And you didn't encourage this?" She asked "fuck no" he blurted out "they both did that behind my back" as he spoke she wrote down more notes "what are you doing?" Mickey inquired "their testimonies are actually very helpful"

"Testimonies?" Mick scrunched up his face in confusion "they're just journal entries, just a boyfriend saying he loves me and a baby sister happy I didn't ditch her like the rest of our family."

"JUST?" Elizabeth looked shocked at Mickey apparent lack of understanding of what these meant for him "these uncoached entries will go a long way in front of a judge." She informed him "the love, support and insight into who you really are is better than any of the notes I could have provided to fight for you" she smiled

"Mickey, if you can find yourself a legal job, and keep that job without any incidents for at least a month It's my professional opinion that you would be off probation."

The twinge of hope ran through mickey he's rarely been off probation, or out of juve, or jail or anything that kept a watchful eye on him. He's be... For lack of a better word, free. But in true milkovich fashion he kept his cool and  nodded "I'll try doc"

***

For the first time after a session Mickey didn't go home, he walked, he wasn't a big fan of walking; it was slow, and boring he already knew what every inch of this town looked like. But now he was walking in hopes of finding a job or at least to clear his head, figure out his life. The things he knew for sure were as follows:  
1\. he'd do something that would make Ian proud.  
2\. He'd do something that he could tolorate  
3\. He'd change his life around

He saw lots of help wanted signs just nothing he was interested in.   
Grocery boy? Pass he'd definitely beat someone with a bag of oranges.   
Janitor? Fuck no cleaning up after rich people who would just look down on him, ain't gonna happen.  
Cab driver or as the kids were calling them now Ubers?  No thanks he had enough teenage drunk girl from Mandy he didn't need strangers puking in his car

Then he stopped seeing what may be the best thing for him, the local paper looking for a freelance writer. Fuck he got into this mess with journal entries maybe it was to lead him here. He laughed to himself with the thought of him writing a self-help column.

He walked in and a little bell above the door rang. How fucking quaint. He cleared his throat "hello?" He called out, he glanced around at the small town newspaper 'office' it had two computers though new they were still computers and not tablets. The walls were covered with stories frames, small awards won and family photos "hi" a perky brunette came from the back room "I,ah, saw you were hiring" Mick started "was wondering if I could apply"

"Sure!" She said happily "names, Meg"she smiled  "Mickey Milkovich" he responded "have you done any writing before?" she questioned "not professionally" he figured if he was going legit he was going to be honest. She nodded "do you have any previous experience in the news?"

Mickey felt like answering that he made the news lots but that wouldn't help him start new. "No, but I'm really good at getting to the truth of a story" ok that was half true he was good at getting people to tell the truth when he used his fists. "Why do you want to be in journalism?"  Meg gazes up, she was probably in her early thirties, rocking some  slutty retro look with old black cat eye glasses, button up white shirt and high waisted but very short black skirt.  Mandy would probably like her. He thought, he also assumed she got every story she went for with a look like that.

"Honestly" Mickey finally started "I'm looking for a change, and writing seems to be something I can do, and I think I could like writing plus it's be different all the time so less likely to get bored"

"Thank you for stopping by" she reached out her hand to shake his. Mick out stretched his hand to meet hers and shook. His eyes followed hers as she for the first time noticed he was tatted. Well damn if he wasn't getting this job due to lack of experience he was sure he wouldn't get it now.

"So do you just have the one tattoo?" She asked seeming more curious than upset by it. "Nah, I got a few" he answered "are they all fuck the world mentality as this one?"she inquired more "no some are just fucking stupid" did he seriously just curse during an interview. "So this one's not stupid?" Meg clarified. "I feel like that's a trick question..." Mick looked at her trying to figure her out "no honestly curious, thought I was the only one stupid..or brave enough to tattoo curses on themselves" she rolled up her sleeve to show she too was tatted from her wrist to almost her elbow was fancy frilly, damask looking design, it wasn't till closer look Mickey realized the word 'bitch'  was snuck in there "nice" he smiled "yeah it was between that or twat bubble... Bitch was just easier" fuck he no longer cared if Mandy would like her, he liked her; and Mickey never found a girl he could tolorate. "So Mickey Milkovich, you wanna job?" Meg smiled "you ain't gonna interview anyone else?" He asked "not going to find anyone as good as you, plus everyone else just wants to be a blogger so they can stay in their pyjamas and jerk off whenever they want"

"Well if that's a real fucking job I'll do that" Mick only half joked "tomorrow morning milkovich" he nodded and left, getting home before anyone else on the house woke up, night shift had everyone sleeping well past noon.

_Entry 37_

_I'm gonna try this writing thing as a job..._  
_Can you curse in the newspaper yet?_  
_There's spell check right?_  
_What the fuck am I going to write about?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well it feels like things are falling into place for Mickey!!
> 
> What will he write about  
> Crime in the city  
> Self help columns cause I laughed hard writing that but could also see it being to holds back truth telling for situations.   
> Boring everyday things - cat caught in a tree
> 
> Anyway   
> Comments please :)


	29. Chapter 29

Ian and Mandy were both awoken by a weird smell. Not a bad smell, just an unusual aroma for the milkovich house. Mandy met ian in the hall "you mean you ain't making that smell?" She seemed shocked "mick--" Ian called out causiously drawing out his name "in the kitchen" he yelled back. Ian and Mandy shared a look before walking into the kitchen "you're cooking"  
"You can cook?" They sounded surprised "fuck you two" he spat "you want food or not?" Mick asked placing the stack of pancakes on the table. They nodded eagerly and sat down "so what's all this for?" Ian asked placing three pancakes on his plate "wanted to celebrate..." He kept them on the hook. "Can you find more reasons to celebrate" Mandy mumbled through a mouth full of pancakes "and today's celebration is...." Ian pried

"I got a job" Mickey smiled joining at the table with a plate of bacon "like a real job?" Mandy asked a bit shocked "yes a real fucking job" he groaned "downtown has a newspaper, I'm gonna write" he informed them "so someone actually wants to give you a job?" Mandy arched an eyebrow "shut up Mandy" to everyone's surprise Ian barked "I wanna hear this"

"Not so much to tell yet" Mickey informed Ian "she seems really fucking cool, she wants to give me a chance so I'm gonna start tomorrow morning" he gave a soft smile before digging into to his food "but If we work nights and you work days we'll never see you" mandy sighed "yer seein' me right now" he pointed out "we can make it work" he locked eyes on Ian; he'd do anything to make it work with him "yeah we can we got at least four hours before I need to go to work"

"God please tell me you aren't going to fuck" Mandy whined "well not the whole time" Ian smirked "can't we do something else?" She continued in the same whinny tone "what's with you, it's like you haven't gotten laid....wait you haven't fucked his brother yet?" Mickey asked a bit surprised. "I work ya know" she rolled her eyes obviously not enjoying the turn the topic had taken. "Yeah and I've seen you blow a guy behind the counter" Mick squinted his eyes hating that he reminded himself that he did walk in on her "and didn't you..." Ian started but was cut off "yes I'm a slut I know" she yelled "maybe I was trying to change, try not to screw this up, I don't want to ruin what we all have, what you two have..." Her voice got soft and sad.

"Mands..." Mick's voice also surprisingly soft "who you screw isn't going to affect us."

"It's his brother! It might!" She sighed placing her head down next to her plate of pancakes

"Mandy..." Ian started "we talked about this, you're my family I just want you happy" he pushed her gently "the thing is..." She inhaled "I am, did you know he's so fucking smart he's done those SATs for other people, that he actually went to college"

"I did, but I have an inside source" Ian grinned watching Mandy light up talking about lip made him realize they might be good together "and what's his plan now that he's a dropout?" Mickey asked always the over protective brother "well if you're gonna be gone to a real job he might just stay and help me" she mentioned casually like she and Lip hadn't already talked about it.

***

After a very cute and normal afternoon Mandy left early to go work or as Mickey suspected gone to screw Lip before work. He and Ian were left, sitting and honestly just talking, enjoying each other something that's felt like it's been forever since they did.

Mickey would never say he's cute; but ian had no problem thinking or saying it. It was really when Mick gets tired that tired Ian had noticed he gets a little twitch in his nose. "I think it's time for bed" Ian informed Mickey "it's like 8:00" he grumbled "yeah and you worked the night shift with Mandy, and went to see the Doc first thing this morning, you're running on fumes" Ian reminded. Mick shrugged and nodded "what, you gonna Fuckin' tuck me in?" He asked as Ian got up "no, I was planning on getting dressed for work." Ian gave a soft smile as he shook his head heading off to the bedroom

By the time Mickey got to the bedroom, Ian was already in his boxers, digging through the dresser looking for clothes. The closer her got to the bed the more tired Mick felt, he rubbed his eyes, undid his pants walking out of them, he got his shirt up and over his head tossing it onto the ground before collapsing in the bed. The moment his body relaxed on the bed he let out a moan. Yup he was tired.

Mickey's eyes fell closed listening to the sounds of Ian shuffling around, he didn't even feel Ian slink into the bed, it wasn't till he felt a hand wrapping around his cock. Almost instantly he was hard, Ian had that effect on him "oh you're up I see" Ian chuckled he swiftly got Mick's boxers off and lowered his head and sucked at the wet head, bobbing his head and licking "fuck" Mickey goraned "I thought you were going to work" he tried to sting the sentence to get her but kept gasping. Ian popped off "oh you want me to stop" fuck the ginger was coy.

Ian moved his body up the length of Mickey his body pushing agisnt his. Ian softly kissed Mickey's lips, his eyes still closed letting his over senses go into over drive, he could feel the electricity between them, that's when he also felt Ian's thobbing cock pushing against his.   
Fuck it was hot  
Mickey had never felt another cock on his before, they bobbed and twitched as the other did.

Sleepily, eyes still closed Mick moved his hand to find Ian's dick and slowly started jerking him off while they kissed.

Ian followed suit trailing his fingers down Mickey's side across his hips, down the inside of his thigh, finally landing on his cock.

They rocked together

Moaned together

Mickey felt his hand grow wetter as cum drips through his finger.  
"Oh God"   
"Oh Mick"  
"Fuck Gallagher"

Mickey finally opened his eyes after they finished. Ian hopped up out of the bed "coming for a shower?" He asked "no I'm going the fuck to bed like I tried to do" Mick grumbled "you fuckin likes it" Ian smirked and disappeared into the shower. Mickey drifted off to the sound of the water. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick chapter for you lovely readers
> 
> Which is just me giving my self an extra chapter to figure out what Mickey will do at his job in the next chapter lol 
> 
> Love and comments


	30. Chapter 30

"morning Milkovich" Meg smiled as he walked through the doors, at what he felt was an ungodly hour; it was 7:30.  "How the fuck are you here, dressed and perky?" He goraned "coffee, lots and lots of coffee" she smiled handing him a very large to go cup of coffee "I had a feeling you weren't going to be a morning person "thanks" Mickey nodded taking the coffee without question , taking a sip he was surprised "no sugar" he muttered "sorry you take sugar?" She asked a bit surprised "no but people always just assume to add milk and sugar"

"It's kind of my secret power. I just know how people take their coffee; like yourself you're a as large as they come and keep it black" Meg smiled "so what are you?" Mick asked "since I don't have a super power and I figure coffee boy will be part of my job description"

"Me, I like as much as I can get with just a splash of milk, nothing fancy"  which always surprised people based on how fancy her outward  appearance was, people assumed she want whipped cream and sprinkles. Mickey was still surprised that she put together so early she had a dark purple button up top and a high waist mustard colour skirt with flowers, and of course her standard cat eye glasses and red lipstick. Meanwhile he was wearing the only pair of clean jeans he could find this morning, a plain black tee and a leather jacket.

"And I don't think you'll have time for coffee runs" she smiled "if you haven't noticed we're kind of a small office" she looked around "so it means you'll be helping with multiple stories"

"Cool" trying to act casual. "So what am I writing?" Mickey asked ready to start "want me to go undercover for a mod boss? Maybe ya need me to discover dirty cops in the town?" Maybe he sounded too excited to dig for dirt but she smiled at his enthusiasm "maybe baby steps there milkovich, why don't you just start with the weather" Meg suggested "people got fucking apps for that megs no one reads the paper for the weather" he huffed "the problem is no one reads the paper anymore" she told him honestly "but that's why I got this old place for a steal, it's why I hired you, we can make people want to read again"

"You're putting a lot of fucking pressure on me" Mick admitted "so what were you fucking thinking?" He asked. She bounced over to him with a stack of folders "you're choice!" She started tossing folders down on the desk as she said what each one entailed "politics, self-help, obituaries, sports"

"I can't do politics" Mickey told her flat out "sports I'm telling you now I'm going to be biased, and then dead people and sad people those are my choices?" He sighed

"Oh quit you're whining Milkovich" she smiled "and start writing" she tried to act stern

Mickey started with that he thought would be the easiest,sports:

_In NFL sports the Chicago bears won against the Carolina Panthers, but is that really does that surprise anyone it was the Panthers come on! Don't go holdin' you're breath that means we'll make it to the Superbowl or anything cause the last time we won a Superbowl was like 1985._

Mickey put the article aside obviously sports wasn't going to work, he followed sports well enough but not enough to keep up on the inguries of other players not on his team, nor did he keep up with sports he didn't watch, like Nascar cause fuck what's exciting about making another left turn.

Obituaries:  
_Betty Wren_  
_She was an angry old bat that you'll all pretend to miss and are sad for her passing, you'll all of a sudden forget that she yelled racial slurs from her porch. She definitely wasn't a Betty Crocker though her pot brownies weren't half bad. And she wasn't as funny as Betty White but some of those slurs were on point._  
_We ain't gonna miss her_  
_But if you wanna free tiny sandwich and coffee_  
_The funeral or wake or whatever it's called where her cold dead body is on display will be on the weekend, like at a regular time 2? Yeah 2 till 4 sounds good._

He put that down. Fuck. This was not going well, writing in his book it was allowed to be anything, this was a paper, Megs was gonna kill him none of these were acceptable.

Self-help:  
God was he really going to try this. He skimmed over the letter before letting out a deep sigh

 _Dear I hate myself_  
_Just stop._  
_What do you want sympathy?_  
_Getting other people to praise you will make you happy for like a minute, so make yourself happy_  
_Ditch the boyfriend he sounds like a dink_  
_Eat the damn doughnuts if it's going to make you feel good_  
_Ya know what throw the fucking scale out with the boyfriend don't need that either_  
_Do shit that makes you happy_  
_Stop fucking whining_  
_Have some damn good sex_  
_Start just living._

Mickey goraned loudly as he hit his head on the table. "This was a stupid fucking idea" he yelled not even sure if Meg was still around. "Hey it was my idea" she yelled back "you calling me fucking stupid?" She looked for clarity coming closer to him arms folded. She had the ability to have resting bitch face, still look stunning, and still make Mickey smile. "Guess I am" he answered "cause you thought some thug from the street would be a good idea"

"Shut up and let me see" she demanded the stack of papers. He handed then too her without looking at her. His head burried in his arms that were folded on the desk. He listened to her breathing, the sound of air being exhaled through her nose with one quick burst made Mickey think she was amused. "Not bad" she finally spoke. "I feel like if this is how we're going to write we should also just change the name of the paper" she gave a smirk, "the gazette, isn't that exciting of a title anyway, so....we should call it something like: to tell the truth!"  
"Isn't that some old ass game show?" Mickey asked "you should call it You can't handle the truth" he grinned "right and my reference was old" she rolled her eyes   
"the truth is out there?" She suggested "yeah and the tag line "and it hurts" Mick added  
"Truth or Dare?" He suggested "no that's weird" he added.  
"Trust me" they both laughed

At that moment the little bell above the door went off as they turned Meg saw a beautiful, tall, lean red headed man holding a tray of coffee "hi" Ian smiled "thought you'd need another coffee by now" he gestured to Mickey "but you actually sound like you're in a good mood" it wasn't that Ian was surprised Mickey was often in a good mood when they were together, it was that Mickey was in a good mood at work, 95% of people hate their jobs and Mickey just seemed like  a person who would just do work for the money. It really did make Ian happy for him thought.

"Sorry, I'm Ian" he smiled "Meg" she smiled back taking the coffee "what do ya got in there?" She asked bringing the coffee to her nose "coffees black but there's milk and sugar cause I didn't know how you took it" Ian said honestly yet the two laughed and had a look between each other "thanks" they both said "inside jokes already" he nodded "you must be something to get Mickey to like you so fast"

" Oh hunny, you have no idea" she smiled over exaggerating flicking her hair back. "You're kinda fabulous, ya know that" ian commented not meaning to sound as gay as it did. "I do know! You're kinda gorgeous too, how'd Mickey land you?" She asked, "persistence mostly" Ian grinned looking over at his boyfriend "really he nagged you?" Meg seemed surprised "no I did!" He corrected "you two are gonna be fun!" She sipped her coffee "drop by anytime Ian" Meg glided away

"I like your work wife" Ian told Mickey "she not my-- I dont--"

"Cool it milkovich" her voice really carried "he's not callin' you a cheat" she reassured him "I'm not Mick, I just think you two are a good fit I think you'll have fun, plus you like this too much to leave" he leaned in giving him a kiss "I'll see ya later" Ian smiled leaving

Mickey smile to himself and picked up his book   
_Entry 38_  
_I might like regular life._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys day light savings is killing me today...
> 
> Also I could have wrote this chapter forever!! So fun!
> 
> What do ya think? Is there a topic you want Mick to stick with?
> 
> Comments always welcome but you know that by now!


	31. Chapter 31

"Milkovich!" Her head shot up from her small wooden desk across from his "what if we called it 'truth be told'?" Megs laughed at her own idea "I think we gotta cut you off, yer goin' loopy on me boss" Mickey replied

His desk was surprisingly organized, the computer sitting in the corner on an angle, still untouched Mickey was going old school using pen and paper. He had three piles of folders for all the topics he had to cover. And of course he had his far too large cup of coffee. The trash can and the floor around the trash were a different story, it was the place where articles went to die, and it seemed to be a Massacre. He was doubting himself, he didn't know if he was suppose to be funny, speak his mind, or be professional. "Is that all you've been going over there?" He asked "you took two hours and that's all you came up?"

"Hey! I'm the boss you can't talk to me like that?" She tried to sound all athoritative but there was a crack in her resting bitch face and a smile slipped out "plus I had other idea.." she held up multiple sticky notes.

Her desk looked much different than Mickey's. It was was the same in only one aspect; she wasn't using her computer either. It was being used to display all the colourful sticky note with her brillent ideas. She had a day planer open with notes in different colour pens for different activities. it's not that it was messy but it was definitely colourful and maybe lacked a bit if direction.

"Well let's hear em'" he coached leaning back in his chair, tossing his feet up onto his desk "ok" she cleared her throat " so we got 'the plain journal'... Ya know cause I'd be funny cause we are anything but plain... Ok no stupid yeah I thought so too" she obviously didn't require Mickey to have an input apparently "um.. then there was 'the daily truth' " she paused looked at Mickey who didnt have time to respond again before "you're right not good enough" Megs sighed "the naked truth" Mickey finally spoke up fast enough to get a thought in "so I'll speak the truth and you'll be what naked on the cover? I'm sure people will read it for the articles" he laughed

"Shut up, or I'll write you up for sexual harassment"  she winked "Yeah you do that, just don't forget to add the part where I'm gay k!"

"What else ya got?" He asked "cause all these Fuckin' awesome articles can't go into a nameless paper" he grinned "oh yeah well let's here what you got then Milkovich if you're so clever"   
Fuck this bantering shit just back fired on him if he had to read them   
He sighed   
"Fine we got another obit cause people in this town are fucking old" he pointed out "really work is never dead!" Megs added "Ba-dum-dum-chee" he played air drums and cymbal.   
"So come on who's dead now" she pestered

 _John MacDonald_  
_Is old as fuck an accurate count? Hold on what's the fucking math 1930-2017... 87 yeah that sounds right, anyway he did not age well._  
_Pretty sure he was a spy, I mean come on John MacDonald could ya be more generic, though he was just as boring as his name. cause fuck so any of you know who I'm talking about? Thought not._

 _Sally Green_  
_She was a cheerleader, she was peppy!_  
_You wanna know why she was so peppy, coke! And I don't mean the drink kids._  
_Which is how she died_  
_Now I don't want to hear all you sappy fucks going on about how she died too young she had potential...she had no potential,maybe finally being a decent dancer at the gentleman's club. But that's it._

"What do you know about a gentleman's club?" She asked, and the first thing Mickey thought was he loved that her only concern was he was not someone to be making comments about a female stripper

"Oh my God! She leaned forward on her chair both hands flying down hitting her desk "I just thought of a real story for you!" Megs has a wicked smile that got Mickey nervous

"I've never been able to get an inside scoop, but you could" she still had that look. Mickey swallowed hard "well spit it out woman" he finally snapped the waiting was killing him

"Boystown! You could do a whole expose" she said arching an eyebrow to see if he was interested "fuck no, no, you want me to go down and be around a bunch of fairies" he grumbled "you're a fucking fairy"

"Take that back" Mickey resisted the urge to call his new boss a bitch which he thought he might get away with but he also didn't want her to fire him so he avoided it.

"Tonight take your boy on a date, go dance, go undercover isn't that what you wanted undercover work" Megs smirked with the realization that she caught him "yeah well undercover means in disguise not dancing half naked with music that sounds like a cat pukin up a furrball"

"I think Ian will like it" she folded her arms not backing down "yeah he fucking would" Mickey sighed

"Great you'll have a story on my desk tomorrow afternoon" Meg spin around in her chair in excitement.

Mickey got out his phone

 _When you done tonight?_ [Message sent 5:03]

 _I came in early so done at 11 if I don't take another shift [_ message received 5:08]

 _Don't take another shift. How bout we go dancing_ [message sent 5:09]

 _You fuckin hate dancing [_ message received 5:09]

 _Can't I do somethin fuckin nice for ya_ [message sent 5:11]

 _You can but it would never be dancing_ [message received 5:12]

 _Fuck. Fine. Megs wants a story. Thought you'd wanna tagalong_ [message sent 5:12]

 _Cool, where we going Mick?_ [Message received 5:13]

 _You fucking know where I can hear you smirking from here. Boystown_ [message sent 5:13]

 _Do you remember the last time we were there? I'm fuckin hot just think about you getting your hands all in my pants on the dance floor_ [message received 5:15]

Mickey tossed his phone onto the desk. Fuck he forgot about that. It felt like lifetime ago the two of them on the dance floor, Ian sexy as all hell and Mickey just as possessive. He'd come a long fucking way and didn't even realize

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at me I follow instruction Ipiccked this chapter up where the last one ended also boystown was suggest for Mickey so I found a way to slip that in, already for some ideas brewing of what will happen there!! 
> 
> Anything else?? 
> 
> Comments!!


	32. Chapter 32

The music was just as bad as Mickey had remembered and to make matters worse Mandy and Ian dressed him. He was terribly uncomfortable with the tight dark wash jeans his sister made him wear; he assumed that also mentioned there wouldn't be any inappropriate jerking on the dance floor. His top wasn't terrible it was just a black tank; he was pretty sure that was the word she used, he'd only ever referred to those types of shirts as wifebeaters. He through on a black leather jacket to have somewhere to put his notepad and pen.

He had to admit he looked fucking good. He never took time to do anything with his look. But between Mandy's wardrobe, and Ian having but something in his hair; he wasn't entirely sure what it was, since he was too busy staring at him still loving being close to him inhaling his sent. He had  looked in the mirror before leaving and he did look put together.

Drinks. Always the first thing on Mickey's list when he had to be out. Mandy and Ian of course went to the dance floor. Mickey pulled up a stool, took off the jacket and placed the notepad on the bar.  "beer, and keep 'em comin" he informed the very sparkly bartender who was only wear gold tight Spandex shorts. Mickey nodded a thanks as he got his beer. He took a sip before opening a notepad to figure out what kind of story to write. He'd jot down some topic ideas if he saw any come up.

"Oh. My. God, have you ever seen, someone so raw and sexy" a very flamboyant voice said two stools away, "no, no he's one of the sexy nerds,  look he's got a book in a club" Of Course Mickey made the mistake of looking to see what they were talking about "yeah, you know we're talking about you" he smiled "fuck, what?" Mickey spat "oooo and vulgar don't you just love it" the man squeeled moving into the spare stool that separated them "ya come here often?"  Placing his hand on Mick's arm"Do I fucking look like I come here often?' brushing his arm away. "I'm trying to do some God damn work if ya don't Fuckin' mind"  he informed the lanky man who insisted on drapping over him "oh, .are you an undercover cop?" He asked not as quiet as he thought he was being. "I ain't a cop, plus what the hell would I be searching for?" Mickey spat "illegal use of glitter?"  He chuckled he did hate glitter tho it was the herpes of art supplies. 

"Then what?" Now curious "I'm a reporter" Mickey informed him hoping it would make him go away "so what's the scoop?" He was relentless "dunno yet" Mickey said truthfully taking a very long drink of beer, he hated talking to people and even worse when they didn't get the hint that he didn't want to talk to him.

It never dawned on Mickey that this guy or any guy would be looking for more than just talking with him. People hit on Ian, not him. So he missed the signs, the touching, the ogling, the small talk to get to know you. It was all just a nuisance to Mickey; so after countless failed attempt the guy decided to go back to his side of the bar, defeated.

Finally alone again Mickey had the chance to look around the club, he started to write down what he saw, something might trigger a story. As his eyes drifted across the club undoubtedly found Ian. God he could move, he was beautiful, Mickey made a mental note not to work the whole time because Ian deserved a boyfriend who'd dance with him.

After being caught up gazing at ian, Mick snapped out of it to look around more. Nothing looked like a story, he felt everyone already knew what they were getting when they went here; golden boy shorts, overpriced drinks, dry humping on the dance floor and -- oh fuck. Mickey heard them before seeing them.

A bachelor party.

They were loud, Mickey called them woo-guys Mandy was often friends with woo-girls and guys. They had many similarities wooing at specific song coming on, getting half priced drinks, and wooing when they saw something they liked/wanted.

And to make matters worse this bachelor party was filled with both, and they were dressed up, wearing unicorn horns, fairy wings, and tiaras.   
All of a sudden he thought of ideas.

 _Topics_  
_•Have bachelor parties gotten too out of hand?_  
_• are gays getting married just to stick it to the man?_  
_•_ _ _how gay should a gay club be?__

"Omg you need to dance with us!" The man with the sash on; making Mickey figure the party was in part for him "I really don't" Mickey told him "you can't work at a club, you gotta let loose" he grabbed Mickey's arm before he could protest "oh and you need a prop"  snapping his finger a little gay boy popped up with a bag of extras "fairy wings?" Based on Mickey's face that was a big fucking no "um, unicorn horns? No you don't look like the poker of the relationship" fuck he was blunt "tonight I think you should be a princess" he carefully placed the tiara on Mickey's head.

Mickey stood there stunned that they thought he looked like someone who would enjoy this, but as it was all happening he figured he shouldn't be his angry abrupt self if he wanted to use this as a story, he needed to blend in learn what he could "so the fiancè here?" Mickey asked. The guys eyes lit up that Mickey was caring enough to ask "yup! Chocolate Thunder over there" he waved and a beautiful black man with an amazing fro waved back "you two got names?" Mick asked "he's Kenneth, and Leo Barbara...but my friends call me Barbie" he smiled "really? you're Ken and Barbie, you're fucking shitting me" Mickey shook his head "so what's with the theme party?"   
"Fairytales and happily ever after obviously!' Barbie smiled "so you always have a scowl or is there room for fun and dancing?'

"I really..." He paused "I can do one dance but I have shit to do man" Mickey figured getting in the middle of this party might be the best idea to find out some dirt. And it didn't hurt that he hear there were rounds going about for those in the bachelor party. He wasn't going to pass up free booze.

Ian looked to the bar again, shocked to see Mickey wasn't there, it took another two glances around the dance floor to find him. His stare became icy who the fuck was putting a crown on his boyfriend and why the hell would Mickey allow it? Was he fucking dancing with him. Ian could feel his face getting redder than his hair.

He should have. He should have passed on the free booze. It was some pink shot that tastes more like sugar than alcohol "what did you call it?" Mickey asked "unicorn fart" they all giggled; he just rolled his eyes if there was a story here he was starting to doubt it. Barbie had grabbed Mickey by the hips and was rocking him to the music pushing himself a bit to close to Mickey.

Barbie leaned in to whisper some drunken nonsense about last night of being single to Mickey who grunted. He hated at people thought tonight was the last night of being single what about all those other days of the relationship we're you out fucking other people and thought it was ok.

All Ian saw was whispers obviously  it was filthy words being murmured in Mickey's ear,so now he  was fuming, hot, irrational. To make matters worse Barbie seemed rather obnoxiously loud laugh; to be fair to him he was very drunk and stupidly happy

Ian was smart, he knew Mickey loved him he knew he wouldn't do anything. But common sense was out the window, after a few shots with Mandy and seeing another man draped all over his boyfriend who didn't seem to be stopping it. There was something in the pit of Ian's stomach, an ache, a growl, something raw, and animalistic.

Jealousy.

Ian darted toward them his gaze stuck on Mickey who hadn't yet noticed. Ian stood behind mick, grabbing his shirt and dragging him back "the fuck?"  He yelled over the music Mickey furrowed his eyebrows "see ya Barbie -- what is wrong with you Gallagher?" He asked "me you're the one in a fucking tiara" Ian reached up grabbing it tossing it off, as it left his hands the glitter from it fell onto them. The sparkles and the glitter didn't lighten the situation. Finally Mickey could see Ian's face; confused, maybe even hurt. "Outside" Mickey insisted

Mickey had barely gotten a full breath of the fresh air when his back hit the cold stucco wall. "Ian what is with you? He was --"

"Not me" Ian raised his eyebrows

There was a pause, as Mickey's  eyes darted back and forth examining Ian's face. Suddenly, a grin spread across Mickey's face. “You were jealous,” he stated, with almost a back of the throat chuckle but it wasn't a laughing matter  which Mick realized as Ian huffed angrily and turned away, Sherlock laughed out loud, folding his arms. “oh stop pouting" Mickey grabbed his arms pulling him onto him 

 

“Oh, for fuck’s sake--!” Ian sighed he was trying to be fucking mad about the situation, but being in Mickey's arms started to washed all those stupid irrational feelings away. It didn't however wash away the angry hard on he'd gotten 

 

Ian placed his hands on the cold stucco wall trapping Mickey. Leaning in tilting his head down to meet the small man's lips into the most passionate kiss fueled by jealousy poured out. Mick let himself be pressed back against the wall, his arms swinging around Ian's waist to keep him closer.

  
Ian fumbled down to Mickey's belt, pushing the pants down to his thighs. Mickey would have objected; except he never objects when it's Ian and sex, plus it's fucking dark enough and people around here are use to sex on every corner.

Ian grabbed Mickey's biseps turning him harshly into the wall. He dug around his jeans jacket till he found a travel bottle of lube; never leave home without it.

He managed to get his own pants down, his pale ass glowing in the moonlight. Ian slicks his cock with the lube, pulls Mickey's hips towards him; Mickey instinctively separates his legs.

Taking a minute to adjust and align, and slowly push his way in. Ian pushed himself in his lips near Mickey's ear "Mickey Milkovich aint no one's princess" his voice hisses, it sent shivers through Mick, who goraned in agreeance. Mickey grabbed hold of his dick pumping in unison with Ian. Bracing himself against the wall with one hand as the stucco peircing his skin; he didn't care, his heart was racing, Ian was on fire he was in charge. Mick wasn't going to last long.

Ian's whole body sighed as if in relief when he felt himself finish, when he had claimed back what was rightfully his. 

Ian looked away, suddenly embarrassed, and shrugs his shoulders. "You make me kind of crazy, sometimes." He did up his pants quickly

"Crazy with jealousy." Mickey smiled doing up his belt turning to look the red head in the eyes. "Come-on let's get back in. I need a beer after that"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's longer? Don't know if that's something I need to apologize for but I'm Canadian we apologize for everything lol  
> Plus you can all go blame J_Q for it being long she went and wrote 12 amazingly log detailed epic adventure called holding out for a hero... So go read that cause wow. But yeah it made me realize I could be better ...also Mickey's inability to write his article is me still trying to write it. I'm sure next chapter it'll be all sorted out so enjoy some quick sexy time while I do that..
> 
> I'm rambling sorry 
> 
> Always love comments but you.know that


	33. Chapter 33

Mickey and Ian sat together at the bar, Ian leaning into Mick, making it apparent Mickey was taken. Mickey was already feeling buzzed from the shots he got for Barbie which made writing a bit more difficult

 _Have you ever noticed people don't give a shit about PDA anymore, like people can be fucking in a corner and they don't even bat an eye._  
_What's up with that?_

He stopped writing to lean over and kiss Ian softly on the cheek. Barbie popped up next to them "sorry you got jealous"he gestured to Ian "don't worry about it" Mickey smirked, which causes Ian to playfully hit him "I overreacted" Ian stated "how's the bachelor party?' he asked "fabulous, of course" Barbie replied, "do you wanna join us? I promise I won't even dance with your man" he smiled

"Holy fuck" Mandy intrupted "why do straight guys think since their the only ones here that means I'm gonna fuck em?" She huffed leaning into Barbie "oh hey I'm Mandy, I don't know you" she smiled, the realization of not knowing him didn't stop her from being best him "Barbie" he nodded "she belong to one of you?" He asked "my sister" my best friend" they both answered  "yeah they love me" she giggled with a bit of a drunken hiccup "so are we dancing?" She asked. Mickey and Ian shared a look before nodding. Mickey had already agreed to give Ian one dance and blending into the bachelor party maybe no one would notice him, he did hate for people to draw attention to him, and now that he was a reporter he wanted to stay out of people's sight. 

There were a few false starts as Mickey tried to anticipate where Ian wanted him to go: dancing was hard, bumping and grinding he was good at, actually moving to music and with someone. He was like a deer fresh on new legs. "Just close your eyes " Ian instructed  soon all Mickey could hear was the music in his feet, the sounds of the bachelor party around them dulled and it was just him and Ian, feeling Ian's breath on his cheek, his hand guiding him. He leaned into Ian's body.

Mandy made herself comfortable dancing between the soon to be grooms, if she didn't have her own two gays she'd adopt these two. "There you are, sweetness, been looking all over for you,” a voice that had been following Mandy all night haunted her, his eyes wondering over her body.

She forced a smile to her face before coming up with her excuse. “I’m sorry, had to dance with my boys" she patted at Kenneth as he was the taller and stronger looking of the two. 

The waitress came into between them with a tray full of pink shots. "Drinks?" She smiled.  
Oh God yes. Mandy thought but as she reached for it the asshole took the last ones "a lady should never have to reach for her own drink" he was too slick, He smiled as he held out the tiny glass

 

She drank it, and another, but within moments the world became fuzzy. "Fuck" she muttered she knew all too well that this wasn't just being drunk, but how the fuck did he slip it to her she saw him the whole time didn't she?

Her gazed moved to him as he watched her figure it out, he linked his arms with hers "why don't you two fucking love birds keep dancing we'll get out of your way" he had a fucking million dollar smile that won most people over. Plus between not knowing better and being too drunk they agreed. Mandy pulled her arm trying to get free; without luck his grasp was too strong. He dragged her toward the bathroom. "We got a fighter boys" he sounded too excited about that as he was met in the washroom by two others. "Fuck you" Mandy spat. The one in the blue hoodie trailed the back of his finger down her cheek "hey beautiful" Mandy turned her head to try and bite him. The others laughed "feisty"  the second man with the popped collar took his thumb pressing against her bottom lip, replaced seconds later with his lips. Her ability to move was becoming harder. His body starting to push up agisnt hers. She was feeling trapped 

Mickey  was completely caught up in dancing his eyes shot open thinking he heard his sister he glanced around not wanting to leave Ian's side. It's as if they were of one mind, or Ian may have heard her too. "Why don't you go look at the bar, I gotta take a piss anyway" Ian told him

Ian casually walked into the bathroom not expecting the door to not open fully "what the fuck?"he yelled "privet party" someone yelled "well yer gonna make room for one more or I'm gonna piss on the door handle." His bluntness must have taken whoever was holding the door gave way enough for Ian to push his way in

Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw. He figured it was a bunch of guys snorting coke, or some other shit, or maybe even an impromptu orgy he didn't expect to see Mandy pinned to a wall what looked about to get gang banged

Ian's eyes didn't know where to rest, they darted between the guys, and Mandy. "Dude, we're just having fun" he smiled.

He Fuckin' smiled

Blind rage, that's the only way to describe it. Ian grabbed the guy by his fucking popped collar and punched the living shit out of him till his buddies tried to peel him off.

Mandy's body slid down to the floor.

Ian managed to escape their grasp, stumbling into a stall. He picked up the back of the toilet lid, he was mid swing with Mickey walked in. "Fuck" he ducked out of the way. The sound of the porcelain hitting someone makes quite the tink sound. "Ian, what the fuck?"

Ian threw the lid down "you're gonna wanto leave before I tell him, he'll make this look like pillow fight" Ian huffed

The three men scattered like cats running from water. "What'd they do you?" Mickey asked still not having the time to survey the area he was more worried about the love of his life snapping and trying to take on three guys. "Mandy" her name was barley out of his mouth before chills, his knees were buckling unsure which direction he wanted to go; to his sister or to the three men who surely had to die.

His love for his sister was stronger than his desire to kill them. He stumbled  his ass to the ground "Mandy" he let her body fall into his chest "MM--M Mic---" her mouth felt funny, she knew she was drugged mostly because she and Mickey had done multiple drugs multiple times, but unintentional she felt like she was hit with a ton of bricks she wasn't prepared for the that. "Home"  Mickey nodded getting her to her feet "you walk?" He asked trying to sound calmer than he felt. Mandy moaned something that sounded like agreeing so Ian and Mickey propped her up each of them having her arm over their shoulders.

Home was quiet, they all piled into Mickey's bed. Ian went into nurse mode, he made sure she was ok, looking her over twice, he got her water, and Tylenol. Mickey stayed by her side. They threw on a movie none of them were going to watch as mandy fell asleep Mickey looked over her to Ian "thanks for being there" he reached over lacing his fingers with Ian's across the headboard, careful to not run across Ian's busted up knuckles. "I love her too Mick." Ian glanced down

After another hour, Ian was alseep curled into Mandy. Mickey took a moment to write in his book.

 _Entry 39_  
_Fuck_  
_Fuck Fuck Fuck...._  
_I assume this is what an alcoholic feels like when they want a drink_  
_Someone hurts my sister and you're telling me I can't hurt them..._  
_I didn't hurt them..._  
_That's not the Milkovich way..._  
_Maybe I should hunt them down..._  
_They hurt her. And I did nothing..._

Tears snuck up on him. Tonight could have been a lot different, thank God for Gallagher, but Mickey was still kicking himself for not doing more.

Mandy groaned next to him, Mickey placed his hand on her leg "I love you Mickey" she said all groggy "thanks for getting me home" she shifted more into his leg. She had more thoughts in her head more words to tell him about how proud she was of him, but that'd have to be for another time, for right now she was too sleepy.

Mickey fell asleep with the two people he loved most in this world thinking that no amount of writing in the journal was going to help if anything happened to the two of them.

***  
Mickey walked into work after rushing through a shower and trying to remember all his notes, fuck trying to remember his pants were hard this morning. he didn't want to leave. But if he had to leave Mandy being with Ian was the best thing for her

"Hey" he dropped coffee off at her desk, if he was going to be late he better have coffee "got me a story Milkovich?" She asked taking the coffee from his hand, not leaving her comfortable lounging state. She had already kicked off her ankle high heels that were by her chair and had her feet crossed up on her desk, wearing a pair of black tights with a micro mini flare red dress and a leather jacket. "You trying to take my style now Megs?" Mickey asked taking off his leather jacket that he had on from last night. "Maybe this is just our uniform now!" She smiled taking a sip of coffee "so what's our story?"

"Where to fucking start" Mickey collapsed into his chair....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck!  
> Ok this was a rollercoaster to write.. J_Q had suggested roofies don't think this is how you were going to go, bit that's what happened 
> 
> Thought? 
> 
> Love you!!


	34. Chapter 34

"fuck?" Megs had moved from her laid back position to leaning over her desk clinging to every word. "I'm so sorry Mickey... I shouldn't have sent you...." she sighed,. Deep heavy burden sigh "not you're fault" Mick sighed retelling the events were harder than he thought "you ok if we add tequila to these today?" He asked half joking "whatdya want?" She answered to his surprise opening the bottom drawer of her desk "let's see I got some Baileys"

"What am I a teenage girl? No" Mick shook his head "umm I got some Russian vodka Stoles-something, like I said Russian" Mickey sneered "nah had some bad luck with Russians left a bad taste in my mouth"

"I got coffee flavoured tequila!" Megs seemed excited about the last option pulling the squat bottle with large cork out of her desk. Mickey simply nodded passing his cup over "ya know I think you'd like her" Mickey told her taking a sip of his coffee. He wasn't looking to get shit faced at work just a little bit to take the sting off. "Who? Your sister?" Megs asked "No I don't... Girls don't like me" she informed him which caused Mickey to get a grin on his face "she says the same thing"

"So what are we going to do about the article?" She asked "I dunno.. I had some ideas written down before all this happened. It was way lighter than all this shit that went down like _types of guys you'll meet at a gay bar_ "

"No,do that! Start it off light and airy some of the people you meet then the last one ends up being a kind of buyer beware for woman going to bars thinking it's safe..."

Mickey grunted "yeah I guess.. "

***  
"Mickey thank you for meeting me on your lunch hour" doctor Liz smiled "I have to tell you I'm pleased to see you've found a job, and seem to life it based on entry 38" she smiled "yup doc, ya did it, making me an upstanding part of society." He jokes leaning back in the chair "but can we talked about this last entry" Elizabeth took a deep breath  this was not going to be easy it was obviously new and fresh and if she didn't tread carefully all the hard work they had would go to shit and Mickey would go ballistic. "First, is your sister alright?" She asked because any other question could wait if she wasn't

Mick sniffed, lost eye contact with her and nodded "if by alright you mean not raped just drugged and pinned to a wall." He cleared his throat "then yeah she's alright"

"If she ever needs to talk, please let her know I'm here for her" she reached forward placing her hand on Mickey's knee. "Sorry doc, don't think that'll happen I do this cause I have to not cause I want to, I think you forgot that, and she won't come either." He shifted his leg. He was only being an ass cause it was easier than talking, talking would lead to crying and he wasn't doing that

She straightened her posture "of course, I thought I'd just mention that." She thumbed through her notes "can we talk about your behaviour, according to your entry you didn't harm the men that did this?" She questioned "nah Ian actually found her, he gave them a beating and let them go before telling me what happened"

"And you chose not to go after them" she wanted to clarify Mick shook his head "Mandy took priority, I needed to know she was ok more than I needed to bash their skills in I guess" shrugging off the choices he made. She made notes nodding along as he retold events, how he felt like killing people in some serious gruesome details. "Excuse me?" She paused in taking her notes "I said if I found them I'd lock em in a shed nail their dicks to the seat and then set the place on fire, their options would be to die in the fire or live and have whatever would be left of their Cock"

"I'm not going to write that down, I feel you've made so much progress, and you're very emotional today, I don't feel like that would be helpful." She told him placing her pen down "but Mickey these elaborate ideas of torture, it isn't healthy. "

"Don't get yer panties in a knot doc I won't do it" he informed her "I got reasons to stay outta jail now" he smiled thinking of Ian, of how close he and his sister had gotten, his job. Liz gave a smile and nod back to Mickey. Watching him light up about his life was refreshing. "Well if ya don't got anything else to say Lizzy I'd like to get back to work"

"No Mr Milkovich that's all for today." She bit the inside of her lip trying not show how excited she was for him, for the fact he wanted to get back to work, for not cussing her out, for honestly changing. "Till next time" she handed him his book

***

_Types of men at a gay bar:_

_If you have not been to a gay bar yet, you ain't missing out. Terrible music and if you come on the wrong night karaoke. And of course once you're there, there are going to be people who you do not vibe with, so if you need to know the types of people you will come across while being there. Here are the 10 types of guys you will meet a gay bar:_

_So before we start you need to beware there are two groups of people, the singles and the couple's and if you're coming to hook up you need to know the difference; unless you want an angry husband besting the shit out of you._

_**Singles** stay on their feet, better for mingling, always have a drink in their hand and talk with their bodies more than their actually fucking mouth. Fuck I saw a strut on one guy that his ass made it to the bar before he did._

_**Couples** exhausted from just leaving the house are desperate to find a place to sit, their drink will either be something hydrating like water or simple like a beer, nothing fruity or with a dirty name like 'sex on the beach' or 'purple nurple' and most obvious will be their body language, they will complain about their feet being sore or their clothes being too tight, for these are the people who are use to Netflix and chill (and I don't mean it like the kids do. Like fuck don't touch me while I'm trying to find out what happens on the wire)_

_Now that you understand who's available and who's not here's who you'll find:_  
_1. **The I'll hit on anyone that moves:**_  
_They never think 'do I have a chance' they just try and usually crash and burn, sometimes they don't take no for an answer so find a reason to be somewhere else; but not the dance floor because there seems to be a correlation between desperate and awkward dance moves._  
_2. **The Broadway lovers**_  
_They usually come out in packs during karaoke nights, if you can get past how loud they are, how loud their clothes are, they are passionate people who will befriend you in a heartbeat_  
_3. **The husbands**_  
_As previously mentioned you know how to find them but Husband's are obviously adorable because dating in the gay world is incredibly difficult, so it is nice to see their love work out. But, you can only see it till 11:00 p.m. because they typically leave to go watch Netflix_  
_4 **the twink**_  
_Like who the fuck let him in he's seventeen obviously but somehow they always get in, shaking their skinny ass on the dance floor all night._  
_5. **The bears**_  
_Though nice enough you can often smell them before seeing them, all hairy, all meat, all typically good looking_  
_6. **The chubs**_  
_Speaking of nice they get shit on a lot but honestly they are braver than me, they embrace who the fuck they are and don't give a shit what you think._  
_7. **The plaid wearing lesbian**_  
_Cause apparently it's a gay bar not a males only gay bar even though they are vastly outnumbered; let's but the ratio at 8:1_  
_8. **The boy next door**_  
_The Boy Next Door is everyone's favorite person - he is genuinely nice to everyone, does everything he can for his friends, and has a heart of gold find one of those._  
_9. **The girlfriend**_  
_Your best friend, your squad goals and your family. This person have seen you drunk cry over a guy at 3:00 a.m., they tag along with you to the gay bar to support you, and have a decent dance partner. They are the epitome of God's gift to you, so cherish them deeply._  
_10. **The straight guy who think he can get the girl.**_  
_Just because you're straight at a gay bar doesn't mean the woman there want to go home with you. Take the hint and walk away. Don't be the ass who spikes someone's drink just because you didn't like their answer. At a gay bar or any bar be a decent fucking human being._

Mickey stopped writing he was getting too upset he was going to start rambling or plotting a murder and he already promised the doc he wouldn't do that.

He realized as he read it over the boy next door is Ian and the girlfriend is Mandy, it makes his smile  seeing how much they've imprinted on his life.

"See ya tomorrow boss" Mickey left the article on her desk and walked out the door ready to go see the people he cared most about. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like it's been a while since we saw our doc. I also feel like I should warn you she might be seeing an end for Mickey.
> 
> Any thoughts or suggestions comments you know the drill!


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg I'm sorry this is so late and it's probably shit so sorry again

  
Today had been exhausting for the reporter, writing about his sister, talking about it all with the shrink, it was all mentally and physically exhausting. Mickey was done he just wanted to be home, hopefully catch Mandy and Ian before they were off to work. He wasn't sure how long being on opposite schedules were going to work only seeing them for an hour or two wasn't enough.

  
Mickey rubbed the back of his neck as he reached the door taking in one more deep breath of the crisp air.

He stepped into the house ready to expect the usual bustle of them getting ready but instead they were curled on the couch "hey.."   

"Hey we're playin' hooky" Ian informed him "I just didn't want to deal with stupid people today" Mandy admitted "plus I seem to have a killer hangover" she tried to joke it off because she definitely wasn't going to be talking about it again. "Did you two eat? He asked "pizza should be here any minute" Mandy informed her brother, which was pointless since it that moment the doorbell rang.

Mickey ended up getting the door and the pizzas, tossed them on the coffee table and collapsed into the chair, leaning his head back until it hit the back of his seat.

They put on a movie, devoured the pizza and had switched seats so Mickey and Ian could be together on the couch and Mandy took the big chair and blanket. Mickey also took off his now uncomfortable jeans; wearing jeans all day there's something freeing about lazing around in your underwear.

Ian leaned over and nuzzled into Mickey side, placing his hand on Mick's thigh. They had let Mandy pick the movie which meant they didn't care for it, bur snuggling on the couch, just being together was worth whatever rom-com Mandy put on. Mickey loved just touching Ian, he didn't need to have sex with  him; of course he would if at any moment the possibility arose. As he understands it most couples stop having sex every fucking day,  So settling down for some cuddling, seemed nice.

Having just written an article about how he doesn't Netflix in chill it took him longer than he care to admit about Ian's intentions

Ian started trailing his nails up and down Mickey's thigh as he slowly put more of his body weight on his boyfriend. He slipped his hand into Mickey's boxers

"Hey, whoa... What are ya--" mickey was flustered "Mandy's right there slee-- but was cut off by Ian, who gave him a look.

  "Don't say anything, don't wake her up" placing one of his long fingers up to his beautiful soft lips to shush him.

Ian tugged down and took hold of Mickey's dick.

Being with Ian had made Mickey realized he was into some fucked up shit, but having a sex in front of his sister was not something he wanted to "get your horny ass to the bedroom"

Ian stares at Mickey as he pulls his shirt off tossing it onto the floor with the other heaps of clothes both clean and dirty. Ian still just in awe of Mickey's appearance; his raven hair, his pale, soft skin, his bright blue eyes that shine brighter than the ocean.

Waited for him in the bed their bare skin touching still caused mick to have butterflies. Ian nuzzled against his neck and kissed his shoulder. Mickey smiled moving his face to find Ian's lips.The kiss was passionate, soft and loving.

The sex was sweet and passionate Turns out you can have sex without chocking, or spanking or name calling. It's different and nice in it's own way. The slow rock of their bodies moving as one, the warmth of Ian's hands holding his hips guiding him."I love you" Mickey hushed as he was lost in the feeling of them "I love you, Mick", Ian replied as he was about to finish.

They kiss collapsed on the bed slight panting as Mickey stares at the celling. He started to fall asleep Ian resting into his shoulder,slipping into  sleep peacefully in the knowledge that this was their life, things were falling into place, they fit,   
that he could do this for the rest of his life.

The morning came all too fast, Mickey woke up pretty much in the same spot he'd fallen asleep. Slowing moving his arm free from under Ian's neck, her slinked out of bed trying not to wake him. He threw on a pair of jeans he assumed were clean and walked out to the kitchen. Making himself a coffee. He had bitched and complained when Mandy got the damn once cup coffee maker but it was fucking convenient. He sat with his coffee that was made in like a minute and sat down opening his book

_Entry 40_  
_I'm good._  
_I mean I know shit didn't happen to me, so I probably have no fucking right to say if I'm alright or not... But I'm good_  
_I don't feel ~~vindicktive~~ , ~~VinDiesel~~ , like going after them.. if Mandy's good I'll be good. _  
_I feel normal_  
_I've never felt normal_  
_As long as it ain't boring lets see how this goes._

Mandy sleepily walks into the kitchen "hey" she acknowledges his existence as she heads for the coffee. Mickey shoves his book away feeling very aware he'd just been writing about her "you good?" He asked "as long as theres coffee I'll be good"

"So, ah, you wanna come to work with me today?" He asked feeling stupid "Mick, I don't need a fucking babysitter" she plopped down next to him. "Nah, I just thought you'd wanna get out of the house or somethin'" he shrugged but honestly he did want to keep an eye out for her "morning" Ian walked in "thank God. Your fucking boyfriend wants to watch over me"

"God Mickey leave her alone" Ian teased "plus I'll watch her while you're at work" me

"You two are fucking terrible" she rolled her eyes "listen I'd you're fucking watching me all day you are going to live up to being my gaybff. We're going  shopping!!"

***  
Mickey was getting use to the day to day of work, not every moment was spent with hilarious banter but sitting putting words to paper turned out to be something he enjoyed, something that made the time pass.

Because when the little bell above the door jingles he was shocked to see Ian and Mandy step in, he felt as though he just left them. Turning to the clock he saw it's actually been a few hours

"Tag, you're it" Ian called out lightly pushing Mandy in his direction "I'm gay'ed out"

"What the fuck did you do?" Mickey asked either of them "we went shopping that's we're I got these one fuck me boots" she kicked her foot up close to Mickey showing off the knee high leather boots "we did everything short of going to a god damn musical!" Ian sighed collapsing in the chair next to Mickey's desk "

Mickey she made me do fucking Brunch!...least there was mimosas so being a bit buzzed got me through" he smiled "Hey

if you're going to handle me like a delicate Fuckin' flower, I'm gonna treat you like a fairy!"  Mandy pipped up "

"Fuck, sorry" Mandy realized Mickey wasn't working alone "I'm Mandy" she smiled seeing Megs at the other desk. Who like always was dressed to kill, or at least stand out; wearing a black long sleeve lace crop top, and high waisted black with red floral skirt. "Megs" she smiled back "so, nice boots" she commented "right!"

"Oh God if they're gonna talk more about shoes I'm goin'for a smoke" ian informed Mickey "wait for fucking me then" he quickly got out of his chair to follow Ian out the door.

"So you fucking tired of people asking how you are?" Megs asked Mandy "fucking right I am" Mandy made her sleep at home throwing her feet onto Megs desk. Mostly for comfort but also to admire the boots. "So what's you're story?" Mandy asked "what do ya mean?"

"I dunno first you hire my brother, and actually seem to like em, second you got this kickass outfit even though there's no one to impress..."

"Oh I wouldn't say that" Megs gave a small smile "but I dress up for me... And to get guys heads to spin; especially when they're with the girlfriend and she gets all jealous, and she should cause she's wearing leggings and an oversized sweater with her Starbucks" she laughed obviously that scenario had happened more than once. "You're a little shit disturber!" Mandy beamed

Some could say it was friendship at first sight; which for Mandy was a rare thing, unsurprising she hasn’t got a lot of friends.

Some could say it was more than friendship at first sight; which was also a rare thing for Mandy, she's never found another woman attractive, then again most woman don't dress like that.

They sit and chat, fuck Mandy realized she's learned more about this woman than her so called boyfriend.

Mandy discovered She'd been writing since she was a teenager, started with the school paper till they kicked her off for exposing the teachers lounge as a hotbox the teachers used  during lunch. And that her family were all rich snobs who did not approve of her moving out and coming over to South side.

At some point they managed to get into her drawer of booze and were now giggling like school girls. Megs flew her head back in a fit of laughter coming back her hair fell in front of her face. Mandy has no idea what possessed her but she reached over and brushed the loose strand of hair to the side.A smile curled at the corner of Megs lips.

Mandy wasn’t sure which one of them moved first, but all of a sudden they were kissing. It was  so good that she couldn’t help but press forward, Megs hands reaching up to curl into her brown hair. Megs felt Mandy's hands grip her exposed hip, the feeling hot on her skin

Mickey cleared his throat "shit" Mandy muttered feeling cold as the space between them grew. "Don't you have a boyfriend?" Mickey asked "fuck off" she barked at her brother "like you two weren't out there getting handsy, don't take that long to have a smoke"

"You're going to leave now, right ?" Mickey asked,

"Yes, Mick" Mandy rolled her eyes "if I don't leave now he'll get this vain in the middle of forehand.. it ain't pretty" she smiled looking at Megs who still hadn't said anything since the boys returned 

"You're not leaving..." Mickey was getting impatient

"Yeah maybe we should go" Ian piped up "you can tell me all about this" he waves her hands around. the two woman. Mandy huffed "don't get your panties in a knot I'm coming"

"So, ah...that was..." She stammered "worth a more in-depth look, I certainly have more leading questions" megs finally spoke "ooo reporter lingo" Mandy giggled "maybe next time will be something worth above the fold"

"Or under" Megs whispered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard first there was writers block then life was stupidly busy. 
> 
> And I feel like the whole chapter is just a tease to all of you lovely readers with Mick and ian sex scene kinda getting brushes over (but I wasn't feeling like explicit dirty sex after the Mandy chapter) then I decide to get over the Mandy thing by getting her a little makeout and then that was cut short 
> 
> Geeze maybe I'm just a jerk  
> Please still comment


	36. Chapter 36

Ian finally managed to get Mandy out onto the street "so what was that?" He asked "nothing" she squeaked "fuck off you're the one that wanted a gaybff so spill"

Mandy bit her lower lip "I dunno, pretty fucking good though" she admitted "what about Lip?" He asked "you were acting so concerned about you two, not wanting to screw  shit up then you go and kiss someone else?" He asked confused she shrugged

"No come on I wanna know" Ian persisted "was he not good?" Ian asked a devilsh smirk on his face "cause let me tell you I've shared a room with him for years he thinks he's the Adonis, God's gift to woman and all that shit."

Listening to Ian did make her chuckle a bit "and he is, I mean, I can see why girls would think that. He's good, he's big, but I thought waiting would have made it... I dunno special sounds too virgin-y... But that spark, that thing that makes you want it more than air" as she explained Ian's smile softened and he nodded along that was what he and Mickey had. "And you're into girls?" Ian asked "fuck no, girls annoy the shit outta me"  
"So did you miss the part that Mickey's boss is a chick?" He asked "how could you fucking miss it, I know you're fucking gay and our lady parts do nothing for you, but you're telling me you didn't see how fucking gorgeous that woman was?"

"Yeah I guess, she's kinda hard to miss with a fashion statement like that.." Ian shrugged "you don't fucking get it, you're already in loooove" she swooned to be dramatic

***

"Fuck Mandy" Mickey greeted his sister   
"fuck Mickey" she mimicked back "this how we greet people now?" She asked "I dunno I thought you just liked to introduce yourself and plaster your face over people you just met" he growled "oh I do that too, as you've informed me I'm a major slut" she rolled her eyes. "You kissed my fucking boss, what the fuck?"

"I dunno" she said simply which drove him crazy "you, ah, kissed his fucking boss" Lips voice came from the doorway "sorry, I was a-just coming to pick you up for work, and ah, can we go back to the fucking part where you kissed someone else" running his fingers through his curls trying to keep calm. "Yeah, I did, sorry. But fuck she was hot, and shit had happened eariler and it just kinda happened..." She had no excuse except that she was a fucking slut.like Mickey had said on more than one occasion in her life. "Wait _she?_ " Lip's stance changing, relaxing "alright well if she's ever up for somethin' just ah, lemme know" he nodded playing it cool

"Fuck you don't care?" Mickey turned around to look at him "nah, man she said it was a chick, it's all good chicks not dicks."

"What?" Mickey looked more confused "not cheating unless there's dick" lip informed him "if you fucking say so" Mickey felt like his eyes were going to bulge out of his face. Who the fuck thought like that, maybe he was just super obsessive, protective, and overall a better person and thought if you're fucking with someone don't do anything with anyone else. But maybe he's just old school.

Mandy bounced out the door to work her night shift hospital with Lip. Mickey took in the silence as they left. It'd been a long time since he was home alone. He didn't actually know what to do with himself. He wasn't gay enough to out on the musical vocals of Michael Buble and have a Bublé bath, nor was he feeling like getting shit faced by himself, he could clean but the idea alone made him laugh so that was a no.

He grabbed his book

 _Entry 41_  
_For too long I've filled my spare time with harassing other people, getting shit faced._  
_So what the fuck do I do now?_

 _***_  
Apparently to answer his question of what to do was to fall asleep in front of the TV, And no one bothered to fucking wake him to get him to move. It was obvious Ian and Mandy got home from their jobs at some point since now Mickey had a blanket tossed over him. The simple gesture made him smile; the crink in his neck made that go away pretty fast.

Between having a showering and having a coffee and cigarette for breakfast it was already time for work, and he hadn't gotten to see Ian. If this was normal life he wasn't going to make it. Before throwing his phone in his pocket he decided to text Ian

 _I miss you, I know that sounds totally fucking lame since you're sleeping less than five feet from me right now, but I fucking miss you Gallagher, and love ya, and I wanna say that to you every fucking chance I have._  
_but working like this we keep missing each other and I Fuckin'hate it cause I love your fucking face._  
_[_ Message sent 8:46am]

He realized after he sent it that it probably had far too many fucks for first thing in the morning but he also doesn't give a fuck about that either it's how he felt and it's how he damn talks Ian knows that.

"Hey" Megs greets before Mickey is fully in the door "hey" he nodded over to her "should we talk about yesterday? Are we good? Did I totally fuck things up?" She asked rapid fire questions "slow down on the espresso, we're good, I mean I'm fucking judging you on your taste but we're good"

"Dude! It's you're sister don't be an ass" she spat back. "Just be careful I guess my sister like one of them birds magpie or something she sees somethin' shiny and wants it" he explained. "Alright, back to work Milkovich"

 _Sports_  
_Football:_  
_We are losing, we haven't won a damn game why are you when still watching?_  
_Hockey_  
_Blackhawks aren't doing half bad they are 2-3 in the season and have a game tomorrow against the Panthers if you care to see if we can do better_  
_Baseball:_  
_It ain't even in season and you wanna know shit about it, ok so the Cubs got Albert almora Jr. like two years ago but he's Probably going to be everyday centre fielder. And as expected Jim hickey will be pitching coach_  
_And if you're a Sox fan go find news somewhere else._

 _Politics:_  
_Nope... No I'm not writing politics. Cause I'll just get fucking mad. And I'm sorta in anger management so I don't want to get mad, and doing anything about the state of our government will get me pissed. And don't think I'm some hippy tree hugging pussy. I fucking believe in guns, and damn right I have the right to be armed. But the damn Cheeto "in charge" is fucking insane.... And now I'm fucking  done._

Mickey stopped writing he'd gotten himself fusterated. But as he tossed his pen down, his phone buzzed

 _Miss you too. Im gonna fix it, I promise, I'm going to get off night shift. Be home when you get home. Fuck I'll make you fucking dinner every night I'm home before you, I love you._  
[Message received 11:43]

His phone buzzed again   
Reminder   
Shrink meeting 30 minutes

***

"Mickey thank you.dor meeting me again so soon, I had some news that couldn't wait till our next meeting" Liz spoke in an optimist tone. "I heard back from a judge, he's going to take your case, you might be off probation" she smiled "fuck" a grin spread across his face even though he tried to stay calm "so when is this happening?" He asked "details are still being worked out but it should be sometime next week"

"Fuck" he said again still shocked with what he was hearing "thanks doc"

"No, this is you Mickey, I was just the messenger, you put in the effort you made a change. So thank you for being an inspiration, for showing me this works, that there's always hope"

"What you saying you thought I was a lost cause Lizzy?" Mickey smiled, he didn't think he would stop smiling at this point. No he would his cheeks were starting to fucking hurt.

 _You still making that supper? I got some news_  
[Message sent 12:56]

***

While Mickey was away Mandy popped by the office "hello.." she called out "in the back" came Megs voice Mandy followed it till she found her in the back.

Dim lighting, over flowing filing cabinets and old rickety bookcases filled the room "it's kinda creepy back here" Mandy declared as her eyes adjusted to the dark "no I like it, it's old, a bit haunting but mostly I feel comfortable back here". She explained "it's like getting to touch your hands into history"

Bent over the filing cabinet Mandy noticed how much Megs looked like a pin up secretary black pencil skirt, sheer white dress shirt, a belt around her middle that accentuated her breasts and long pearls that drew your eye down. "Your brother's not here" she commented "I noticed" Mandy assured her trying to make sure her jaw didn't hit the floor as she spoke.

It didn't matter Megs could feel Mandy's eyes on her, it made her smile a bit, she's love to taste her strawberry lips again smell the coconut in her hair, but she also knew not to be impulsive. After all she had her best reporter outfit on "I just have to find one more folder, why don't you tell me about yourself?" She asked casually "is this an interview or off the record?" Mandy asked not waiting for an answer "I dunno not much to tell Mickey's little sister, school drop out, opened a little first aid hospital thing so drunks don't have to wait and pay out the nose for health care" she nodded trying to think of anything else to say "that sounds cool" Megs filled in the silence. The reporter in her desperately wanting to know more about that.

"Got what I needed" she pulled a file out of the drawer. As she walked towards the door, her body grazed Mandy's; she paused.

Megs stretched out her left arm to touch her cheek. It was incredibly soft. Mandy's eyes were staring at back at her.

 

Megs thumb glided across the cheek, cupping  her face in her hand the gap between them closing even more.

  
It seemed as though whatever this was, it was quickly going to progress sweet kisses were never Mandy's thing and shy touches were only happening cause she had no idea what to do with girls.

Megs all too eager to take the lead gently pushing Mandy's back into the bookcase which gave a small quiver.

Mandy finally gave; gave in to not being in charge, gave in to the kiss and giving in to   
The fact this was happening again. Mickey wouldn't believe her but she honestly came here to talk.

The corners of Megs mouth curved upwards in smile as mandy continued to move her mouth with Megs'. She dragging her tongue across Manny's  bottom lip, almost as if asking premission for entrance. Mandy mostly still taken back by how kissing a woman was different, softer, more understanding of needs and desires.

Keeping her eyes shut; it seemed more like a dream that was happening and  that way, in dreams you can do whatever you want.  
  
Megs slid her hand up Mandy's shirt, grinning when Mandy gasped; whether it be for the shock of it happening or at the cold hand on her lower back. Megs took the opportunity to slip her tongue into Mandy's mouth.

Megs softly ran her hand over Mandy's lace bra, giving a small squeeze, causing Mandy to let out a small

moan when she felt her right nipple being tickled by the fabric, and Megs delicate fingers.

  
Mandy pushed her pelvis closer, pushing herself against Megs thigh, it was weird to not feel a bugle to know that what was happening was truning the other person on.

Still unsure what to do with her hands but feeling pretty stupid not doing anything she grabbed Megs hips, no longer any space left between them she let her hand fall to the bottom of Megs skirt, using her nails she dug into her thigh inching the skirt up. A hum escaped mega lips. The skirt now bundled at the hip mandy felt she was in control, she could move Megs body guiding it to where she wanted to go. Mandy tugged causing them both to miss step and stumble into the books causing a slight crash. Smiling into each other they gave another soft kiss

"Fuck, again" Mickey huffed from catching his breath he stood in the dim door way "I hear a fucking crash thought you fell"

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thanksgiving American readers   
> Here's another chapter since I still feel bad the last one took so long.  
> I feel like you should be aware we may be getting close to the end 
> 
> Let me know ow if you think anything else needs to happen before it's over


	37. Chapter 37

Mickey rushed through the door. "Hey sorry, lots of things at work.." he trailed off trying to get the image of his sister and boss out of his head

"You know if you're going to be the one to request dinner it's just fucking poliet to show up on time!" Ian was sitting at the round kitchen he's found a table cloth that actually looked pretty clean. One half burned candle and two clean plates "you didn't eat?" Mickey asked he wouldn't have blames him "fuck no, there this thing call the oven, it's magic is that it keeps food hot" he smirked "don't be an ass I felt bad!" Mickey declared.

"So what's you're news?" Ian asked serving up some kind of casserole with ground beef and rice, it was one of the few meals the Gallagher's knew how to make; mostly because it made so much you could eat the leftovers for days after.

"Saw the shrink, she's found a judge... Thinks I'll be able to be off probation." He tried to say it as monotone as he could to not give Ian too much excitement, because if Ian got excited and started planning their future, he'd get excited then if it didn't work out he wasn't sure what he'd do.

"Mickey that's wonderful" Ian smiled taking a mouth full of food "yeah, so is this" he mumbled through the face full of food. "So" Ian tried to talk through his mouth of food but opted to chew, swallow than talk "I start day shift next week, I got notice in just in time for next week's rotation" mickey nodding he'd taken too much food again but he really was excited if this meant seeing Ian more.

The rest of the meal was pretty quiet as they inhaled the casserole. Ian ended up in Mickey's lap, straddling him,kissing him. which made mickey close his eyes and arching his head back in bliss. He opened his eyes feeling Ian's fingers lifting the bottom of this shirt, arching forward to ease the shirt coming off, before the shirt hit the floor Mickey was back to Ian's lips, which were shifting as Ian leaned back he reached behind him and grabbed the bottle of chocolate sauce "I think it's time for dessert" Ian had a devious twinkle in his eye.

The click sound of the bottle opening sent shivers through Mickey Ian held the bottle up high, letting a drop fall on to Mick's chest, he quickly cleaned it up with his finger and sucking the chocolate off; not breaking eye contact with Mickey.

This time Ian let more drops fall again cleaning up with his finger, this time bringing his finger to Mickey's lips. Ian smeared it across his lower lip before kissing it off; some nibbling may have been involved.

Once again Ian lifted the bottle this time a long sting of chocolate sauce poured down Mickey's chest, this time Ian decided to clean up with his tounge. Mickey groaned low in his throat; especially as Ian scratched his teeth across Mickey's nipple.

Not being able to take it anymore Mickey pushed his way out of the chair and placed Ian into it. Whipping Ian's belt off, shimming his pants and underwear down below his ass, and Mickey knelt down "I was going to do that" Ian's attempt at protest "yeah well I'm the one that's already fucking sticky" Mickey reminded.He gave a long lick from the base to the head before taking as much as he could in his mouth.

Mickey loves the noises Ian made as he sucked him off; his cock hit the back of Mickey's throat.

Ian's gripped tightened around the arms of the chair. Mickey continued to suck and lick and swallow around his cock until the pleasure began rising to higher levels than ever before. Ian's toes curled. Ian's heart raced, his breathing rapid, his body tenses as he-- "oh God" he was cumming into mickeys mouth. Mickey willingly took in the warm white substance only having a small dripping come out at the corner of his mouth.

After catching his breath Ian suggested going to the bedroom.

Mandy came home seeing the remains of the romantic dinner. "Fuckers didn't leave me any dessert" she mumbled seeing the chocolate sauce. Eating the casserole out of the pan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a short chapter for you lovely readers while I try to figure out what should happen next.


	38. Chapter 38

  
Mickey doesn't keep secrets, not from Ian anyway. but he  doesn't like broadcasting personal things to the whole world. Hell no one knew he was gay. That's  how much he doesn't talk to fucking people. So if anyone would have seen him and Megs talking they would have to assume it was business; they would be wrong.

"...Ok just don't tell Mandy, she can't keep a secret" Mickey told Megs who nodded. "Reporters never reveal their source" Mickey looked at her suspiciously "alright he finally nodded

"Well I gotta go" she told him cutting their conversation short "got a lunch date" she smirked "yeah yeah, do I need to give you the same fucking speal I give the deadbeats shes brought around?" Mickey groaned "no don't think I'll be knocking her up so don't fucking worry" Megs joked before leaving

Mickey had multiple tabs open on his computer. Sports, conspiracy theories about Russia, and though it's a personal computer he had personal things in his search engine. "Hey Mick" Ian's voice came through the door. Mickey shutting down all the tabs faster than when he was a teenager hiding gay porn.

"What are you doin here?" He asked not caring what the answer was, he was just happy to see him "wanted to say hi on my way into work"

"And... Do you have a suit?" Ian's question immediately made his hands sweaty "fuck I dunno maybe do we have to go to a god damn funeral?"  He sighed "no you morbid Bastard. For your trial? Thing with the judge" Ian realized he didn't know how formal this was "it's tomorrow" he reminded not that Mickey needed the reminder "ya need to look presentable at least try Mick" Ian pleeded. Even with his the slight whining Ian was still adorable to Mickey Joe could he say no to him  "yeah, you're right maybe I need a suit"

They had a few more minutes of a conversation before Ian had to go. Mickey was going to be glad when he could see him longer than fifteen minutes at a time. They were like ships in the night, these last fee days; quick glances, a peck of a kiss and lots of texts.

 _Entry 42_  
_Some secrets are ok to keep._  
_Sometimes people just need a change._  
_Sometimes people change...._

Mickey sat reflecting on how much he had changed and he was sure the doc, the judge and anyone else would probably think it was the anger management, but he knew it was Ian he made him a better man.

***  
Mandy smirked flirtatiously, like she did all through lunch and now had convinced Megs to come back to her place. Mandy leaned in and kissed Megs lips. Megs soft tongue slid into Mandy's mouth.

Megs guided her hand up Mandy's chest. She squeezed Mandy's breast, causing her to let out a gasp. Megs quickly took her hand off thinking it was too fast. Mandy didn't have to say anything for Megs to know she was wrong. Mandy  pulled shirt over her head. She threw it to the side, returning kisses running down Megs neck and then stopping at the collar of her shirt grabbing the bottom of the shirts fabric she lifted it over Megs head .

There was a pause  as both woman looked and enjoyed each other's bodies. Meg was the first to move, taking her hand cupping Mandy's breast, massaging on, her other hand wrapping around Mandy's waist bringing her closer. Megs mouth moved closer to the breast. Her tounge flicking out brushing past the nipple.  Mandy moaned as Megs took that to proceed now engaging her teeth with small love bites.

"You like that?" Meg asked knowing this was Mandy's first time with a woman she wanted to insure if she wanted to back out she could.

"Fucking rights" Mandy expressed arching her back, her head falling back, her long hair tickling down her back.

"Good then let's go to the bed" Megs instucted

Megs hands had begun rubbing Mandy's thighs, the delicate touch was almost ticklish on her bare skin. As Megs move her hand to the inside of Mandy's upper thigh, Mandy exhaled a soft moan.

She feels Meg slide one finger slowly inside her and its like she’s being teased because she needs more and without a word it's as if Megs knows that.  Megs grinned at her, mandys already wey, but it doesn't  stop her from sliding a second finger in.

 

Megs leans her head down, slowing the rhythm of  her fingers. She gives a soft timid lick. And again. And again.  Her laps become deeper her tounge twisting in ways Mandy  never felt before. Flicking across her, sending ahivers through mandy. 

It's not long before she can feel herself starting to reach climax. but she doesn’t.  megs continues now sucking on her clit and thrusting her fingers inside her as she rides it out. The warm substance trailing down Megs fingers.

 

Megs waits a moment before slowly releasing her fingers. She settling her hands on Mandy's hip as she lays down next to her. 

Mandy flopped her head over to gaze at Megs “What do you want me to do?” she asked with a hint of curiosity in her voice. "You want me to tell you?" Megs asked still having control intrigued her "kiss me" she instructed

Kissing Mandy knew how to do, like her brothers mantra 'a mouths a mouth' she slipped her tounge in.

"Mmm" Megs moaned breaking her the kiss "mow move down to my breast" she instructed leaning her head back, eyes closed to fulling enjoy, and see what Mandy could do "like tittie tourture?" She asked "mmhmm" she didn't even open her eyes "just start small run you're tounge cross the nipple, suck on it, collect it in your mouth and pull up for as long as you can before releasing it" she explained further.

Mandy did well with instructions her tounge flickering across the hard red nipple, she inhaled before sucking the nipple up as she arched her head up Megs let out an exhale of excitement. "You know what you're doing girl"

"Now twist it, squeeze it" she continued, and Mandy followed, "trail your tounge down now, see what else you can do"  Nipples we're one thing  , Mandy kissed down Megs stomach, kissing with a bit of teeth scratching at her hip when Mandy saw it made Megs twitch. She teased her there before moving her mouth to the slit. She quickly began to lick, long strocks,  before forcefully plunging her tongue inside. Megs let out a loud moan, she had continued to play with her breasts.

Megs legs tensed up and closed around Mandy's  head. Mandy's tounge was deep inside the folds of Megs core, and pressed her lips to the little nub at the top of the slit. She started sucking at it, and Megs moans came fast and panting as she orgasms.

They both laied collapsed on the bed "So," Megs glanced over "that was intense" Mandy gave a small smile "really?" Megs looked surprised "cause we didnt even have toys" she smiled "ok well maybe I meant different" Mandy changed her statement interested in knowing more about toys. 

"Well I should get back to work" Megs said "thanks for taking us out to eat" she winked hooking her bra back on.

***

For Mickey it was odd to pay for something with cash, especially something so expensive. "Ah thanks" Mickey said walking out of the store, this had been his third store today; he'd gotten the suit like Ian suggested, he'd even gotten a hair cut. He was ready for tomorrow

_Entry 43_

_I thought I was getting good at words. But trying to be ready for tomorrow.... There's not enough words to say everything I need._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I've been MIA (Even if it's been six days) somebody thought it was a good idea to have two board meetings back to back from like 6:30-11:30 like don't people know that that's my writing hours!! 
> 
> Anywhere here's a chapter, prepare yourselves next one could be the last


	39. Chapter 39

There it was. Mickey; in a file. Sitting on the podium awaiting the judge to come in. He swallowed hard. He had a feeling in the pit of his stomach.

Hope.

"Mickey relax" Elizabeth said sitting next to him, "you're not on trial it's just a review process, and you're going to do fine." The doc reminded. Mickey looked over his shoulder. Ian was sitting in the wooden pews behind him, Mandy next to him, the two holding hands; not in a nervous for the outcome kind of way, more of a happy to be near each other kind of way. Next to Mandy was his boss Megs, she and Mandy looked like they were happy together, even if at this moment there wasn't anything someone could see to indicate they were together. They were just sitting shoulder to shoulder, with some side smile and glances at each other.

God everything he cared about was behind him, and in front of him was hope, uncertainty. He wouldn't tell them this but the last few nights he hatched a plan that he would just leave if this doesn't go his way, he didn't want Ian to be held down by a failure, someone with no future, someone the courts were going to name unfit in society. He'd make a run for it let them love his life and he'd go underground or something.

Not seeing Ian would kill him, he's grown to fucking love that red headed bastard. He'd do anything to make sure he was safe. "All rise" the bailiff called out distracting Mickey from all his thoughts. Mickey stood as he was suppose to say when he was told.

"This is a hefty file" the Judge commented. "I also see here a letter from your doctor, letter of employment, and two notes from family" he listed off the papers in front of him. Mickey not shocked the doc wrote a letter or that she copied the journal entries from Ian and Mandy, but for Megs to write something actually surprised him, she didn't know him or owe him, if anything he owed her, and if this went the way he wanted he'd litterally owe her his life.

The judge continued to talk Mickey tried to follow all the legal garble, you think he'd been in this type of situation enough he'd understand it all, but every time it just bored him. It wasn't till he heard those words he finally snapped back into reality.

Releif washed over Mickey as he watched the gavel fall. The judge had just given his final verdict. Mickey was a free man. After the long hours with the shrink, the book, the journals he actually got use to having to get his thoughts down. After the years of hate and violence that use to make sense in his life, that now seemed so far away.

He stood again feeling shaky in the knees as he walked through the small wooden doors and into Ian's arms. "You did it Mick" he whispered into Mickey's ear. The hug could have only been three seconds but Mickey could have stayed there forever. He felt his sister's arm wrap around him.

He broke away from them "thanks" he nodded over to Megs who nodded back. "Doc, couldn't do it without you, thanks" he out reached his hand "your most welcome" she smiled

***

“Ian" Mickey clears with throat it's just the three of them chillin on the couch, like old times. But after the day they had, Mickey needs to get this off his chest.  "I love you so much."

"I love you too Mick" ian added in with a smile before turning his attention back to Mandy.

"No I kinda had more I wanted to say." He interted again. "Oh sorry" now both of them were staring at him, fuck he didn't want an audience. He could fucking back out right?

He cleared his throat again  "For so long I never thought I would find anyone. Fuck I never wanted to find anyone, people are shit" he knew he was getting off topic "I never thought anyone would genuinely love me, and want to be with me. And then I met you." Mickey smiled

" You met me at the end of my dark days, or maybe because of you it was the end, you are  my true north, my light for that I'm grateful"

" You have no idea how much better you make my life,These last few months with you have been the best

of my life. Ian Gallagher, will you marry me?" Mickey finally asked

 

"Holy shit that was a wedding proposal" Mandy covered her mouth

.

"Mickey.."

Ian's head shoots up, and he stares at Mickey for a long moment before stepping over the small over table, being face  to face with Mickey, he grabbed Mickey's face, pulling him into a kiss. “Yes,” Ian murmurs against his lips.

 

"I love you Mickey, I want nothing more than to wake up beside you every morning and for you to be the last person I see every night before I go to sleep" 

 

Mickey fumbled in his pocket, slipping the ring on Ian's finger, the woman at the store had convinced Mickey that rose gold was in, so he took a simple rose gold band but had found one that had wood inlay. It was simple with just a bit of shine.

 

"Ok, Let's get married." It was Mickey's turn to smile, a great ear-to-ear grin that lit up his entire face.

_Entry 44_

_Today was a good day._

_The rest of my life is going to be good_  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking through all of this with me!!

**Author's Note:**

> I hope this ends up being as fun as I think it can be  
> Feel free to add comments or suggestions of journal entry or situations for Mickey


End file.
